DEAR MISS MANNERS: Ten years ago, I got married for the second time, four years after the death of my first wife of 38 years. Everything is fine and dandy except when it comes to Christmas cards.... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I need to know if it is appropriate for a guest (especially family) to give money to help with food, bills, or what have you after they visit for a weekend or a couple of weeks. My ... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I recently joined the managerial staff in a medium-sized company. Two months ago, my boss explained his holiday "tradition" of having each of us contribute $75 to a holiday gatherin... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My elderly mother enjoys participating in the social activities at her senior living complex. In addition to weekly card games and coffee klatches, they also have seasonal brunches,... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: One of my favorite things to do with the computer is make greeting cards, sympathy cards and birthday cards with software. The cards are made with high-performance paper and look ve... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was brought up in a home where I was expected to dress appropriately for special occasions, especially the holidays. My husband's family dresses far more casual and rarely goes be... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Never did I imagine that I would live to see the day that I would be invited to Thanksgiving at the home of an out-of-town acquaintance and arrive bearing a turkey and wine, only to... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: On September 11, the whole world fell apart. Members of my family had to walk from Manhattan across the bridge to get home to Brooklyn. The next day I was still told to have a nice ... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: A group of friends has been showing up at a restaurant bar for as long as 30 years, and on rare occasions, a latecomer may be the recipient of three or four drinks already purchased... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: In the wake of the tragic attacks on New York and Washington, my wife and I canceled a trip to attend the late September wedding of an old friend in Europe. While we believed that f... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Several months ago I read in some food magazine that when one finishes the entree while dining in a restaurant, it is considered good manners and considerate to the server or busboy... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: About half of all those free return-address labels I get have my name preceded by "Mr." If someone wants to call me mister, that's fine, but I don't believe it's right to call mysel... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Please tell me if I have been a bad girl. I was ordering lunch at the counter of a local deli when a woman I had not noticed came up behind me after having left her sunglasses on a ... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: We are a family of recent immigrants who have just received their permanent residency permits. While we came to the United States on a temporary assignment, we have grown to love th... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was stunned when I had my family and two adult children over for an informal Sunday evening dinner, and my 60-year-old sister popped a tape in and put her earphones on her head wh... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a cleaning lady, and I also clean my church. My problem is that when I go to someone's home for a social occasion where I'm invited as a guest, I'm expected to help serve and c... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter and I always seem to be attending a funeral service. Sometimes this takes time and effort to do. This is a large city, and we sometimes drive 10 miles to the mortuary.... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Our living room has two large, built-in bookcases, filled with some of our favorite books. (Still others fill up our study.) The first guests to arrive at our parties will occasiona... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: The scenario: the 50th wedding anniversary of my favorite uncle and his wife. (Note the phrasing.) He and I were very close and had frequent conversations until I came out five year... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When our friends join us at any restaurant on a social evening, I find it awkward when they request separate checks. If we are close enough friends, why is this necessary? It seems ... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: As a birthday party for my friend, I had a pot luck luncheon for a group of friends, all retired, who sew together. I placed the entrees on a buffet table and put the desserts, incl... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My friend's husband has the habit of answering our telephone when visiting us, sometimes to regrettable effect. Once he answered immediately prior to my husband's surprise birthday ... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter's wedding five months ago was very small, and only family was invited except for a couple whom we have known for 31 years, who are considered "family." These people have... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My boyfriend's father is a physician, and I have always addressed him as "Mister" since it comes naturally to me. I am 18 years old, and have been dating my boyfriend for three year... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Perhaps you know the drill that charity organizations use to rate their donors: Large donors are "Patrons" and "Benefactors," while smaller donors are merely "Associates."... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Only you can help me, as I consider this strictly a question of manners and do not wish to be told to seek counseling or get in touch with my feelings.... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am writing about an etiquette problem common in historic re-enactment/living history groups, for any given historic era: people who are popularly known as "authenticity police."... more
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband makes comments to sales clerks, waitresses, etc., that I think are unpleasant jabs to make them uncomfortable. He says he's "just joking," and I'm being neurotic and spoi... more