DEAR MISS MANNERS: Upon entering the bin-loading line at airport security, the traveler directly ahead of me started to load her bin at the tail end of the "rolling pin" line, farthest from the scanner. There was no one ahead of her, leaving the roughly 30 feet of loading area empty.

There were travelers behind me. I grabbed an empty bin, walked around her and began filling it. She completed loading her bin and brought it around in front of me, immediately in front of the scanner to run through.

I would not have noted any of this except that, as we picked up our bins post-scanner, the traveler turned to me and noted that I had rudely cut in front. With several additional critical comments, she got her displeasure off her chest.

I had several responses in mind, but simply wished her safe travels. I have had a bit of esprit de l’escalier, but also some reflection.

Who, in your opinion, was the impolite party? For my part, I think this traveler committed two etiquette gaffes, but I have certainly been wrong before.

GENTLE READER: Even had she not known how you (politely and correctly) resolved the situation, Miss Manners would have concluded -- from your charging that person with only two rudenesses -- that you value civil coexistence. She thanks you for that rare restraint.

In your place, your fellow traveler, who is evidently stockpiling indignities, would no doubt have filed separate charges for each specific insult -- without waiting to think of them on the staircase.

A polite traveler who needed extra time to hoist everything up onto the belt should simultaneously, and explicitly, invite those in line behind to proceed.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is there really such a thing as rummage sale etiquette?

Here is what happened: A friend told me about a church rummage sale via text, with pictures. She wrote in capital letters, "I REALLY LOVE THIS" next to a picture of a quilt for sale. I said it was neat.

Well, we were in line for the sale to open, and she was in front of me, but she went in a direction away from the quilt. I knew where the bedding was at this yearly sale, so I got the quilt because I wanted it, too, and so did two other ladies.

She is now mad at me because she said I knew she quilted. But I had forgotten that. She asked whether our friendship was worth me getting the quilt before her.

So what is the etiquette? I feel that whoever gets the item, gets the item. Is that right, even if you both want it??????

GENTLE READER: Yes, but yours was not exactly an innocent mistake, was it?

You learned of the quilt because of your friend’s text and you watched her go off in what you knew was the wrong direction.

Miss Manners admits that it would have been worse had you trampled her in your haste to snatch the quilt -- or hidden it when she passed by -- but surely you must understand why she feels ill-used.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: An old friend from high school has reached out to me. This means that he made the effort to specifically track down my phone number to send me a text. I don’t have any social media presence, in part due to a lack of interest, but also to avoid these sorts of situations.

He was never a close friend to begin with, and I am not going to resume any sort of relationship with him. I know the polite course of action would be to chat with him, make a small effort to express enthusiasm I don’t feel for his having contacted me, and quite possibly end up making plans to get brunch or whatever.

That ain’t happening. I’ve no interest in small talk, I’m not going to share anything about my life with this person, and I have no curiosity about what they’ve been up to in the last few decades.

That’s harsh, but it’s the honest truth of the matter. So which of these is the less-impolite option: telling this old acquaintance I’m not interested in continuing any level of friendship, or just not responding at all?

I don’t like ghosting people, but replying to a request for friendship with “no thanks, I’m good,” is also kind of a bummer.

GENTLE READER: Is showing some minimal civility to someone you describe as an old friend really such a burden?

Note that Miss Manners does not include under that banner a requirement that you report back about your life, have brunch or, while you are at it, get married and buy a house together.

All you need do is text back, “Nice to hear from you.” This need not be done immediately. And if there is a follow-up, your subsequent responses can take longer and longer -- until your old friend gets the idea without your having to smack him.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have two friends who always arrive between 20 and 45 minutes early for parties. They send me a text when they arrive, saying that they will wait in their car until the appointed time.

It seems rude to respond that yes, they may wait in the car, so instead, I invite them to come in while I finish getting things ready. Knowing this always happens, I try to have everything ready an hour early -- but then, by the time the other guests start arriving, the hot things are cold and the cold things are warm.

Would it be acceptable to hold off on putting out the food until the appointed time? I hesitate because it would leave the early arrivals sitting alone while I return to the kitchen. This seems rude, but what is one to do?

GENTLE READER: While Miss Manners sees nothing wrong with serving the food at the scheduled time, she would also understand if you -- with appropriate and sincere apologies -- leave your too-early friends outside, and explain, when they arrive on the dot, that while they were texting, you were busy rushing to get everything done.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: On New Year's Eve, we took my elderly mother and a friend to a fairly upscale Italian restaurant. My mother and the friend each ordered a glass of red wine. The server, who knows us as regulars, confirmed with my husband that he wanted "the usual coffee for the driver."

When it was my turn, he asked if I wanted my usual red wine. Instead, I asked about Champagne -- “by the glass, as I am the only person here tonight who likes Champagne.” He said they had nothing by the glass, but they had several types of small bottles, splits and single-serve bottles. I asked a couple of questions (sweet or brut?) and ordered the one that sounded best -- a split of no more than two glasses.

When he brought the split, he brought three glasses and divided the Champagne into three partial servings. So my mom and the friend were each served both the red wine they’d ordered AND a glass of what I’d ordered for myself.

I let it go, as it wasn’t that big a deal and I really couldn’t think of a good way to say, “Hey, wait -- that’s MY Champagne.” They enjoyed the red wine, but neither touched the Champagne. Not only did I not get a full glass for myself, the other two partial servings went to waste.

Was this just a goof by the waiter, or is it a rule that any time a bottle of Champagne is ordered, no matter how small, it is expected to be shared with the whole table? This was a very early dinner, so no midnight toast was in the offing.

GENTLE READER: Still, it was New Year’s Eve, good fellowship, and all that.

Miss Manners wonders why, in that spirit, you did not say, “If you’re not going to drink that, may I have it?” You could have started with your mother, and her friend would have been sure to say, “Here, I haven’t touched this, either.”

Some wisdom to guide you through the new year: It is all right to ask for what you reasonably want as long as you do it politely. And for that waiter: Listen to the customers.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended a New Year's Eve party with about four other couples. At 10:30, people started leaving, and I quickly came to realize my husband and I would be the last remaining guests.

I was afraid it would be rude to be the only ones there and have the hosts feel obligated to continue to entertain just us until after midnight. So my husband and I also got our coats and left just behind the other guests, leaving our hosts with an empty house.

Was it right to leave and not be the last remaining guests, or would it have been better to stay until the new year was toasted?

GENTLE READER: How awful for the hosts to be deserted during the key part of the occasion. Miss Manners does not accept your reasoning that, after preparing for guests, they would prefer to be left alone. Please apologize to them.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)