Dear Helaine: My situation is a mixed bag. I’m currently an adjunct professor who somehow manages a decent -- $75,000 -- income. I’m 34. I have $80,000 in an IRA and another $20,000 in emergency savings. On the other hand, I still owe $10,000 on $75,000 in student loan debt. My profession is unstable, and I sometimes don’t know what I’m earning until all my classes are assigned. But I know my schedule for the next several months, so should I take out half my emergency savings and pay off the student loans, which otherwise have five years to go at $350 a month? They aren’t keeping me awake at night, but I would like to see them gone.

I’m quite conflicted. I am frugal, but I don’t deprive myself of simple pleasures -- I eat out with friends, and I travel at least twice a year. I think that paying off that debt will help me feel better about my financial situation. Also, I’d like to begin to save for a down payment on a home. What do you suggest? -- Feeling Trapped for No Sane Reason

Dear Trapped: I think you are obsessing about the student loan to cover for a bigger worry: You don’t have a steady source of income. Working as an adjunct at institutions of higher learning can be very fulfilling, but as you yourself point out, it’s less than predictable. You literally don’t know what you are going to earn the next semester -- or if you are going to earn anything at all.

And you are in your mid-30s, reaching an age where your friends are likely buying homes and otherwise getting more fixed in their lives. You, on the other hand, are going to find it tough going getting a mortgage even if you have a down payment in hand, because you can’t show steady income.

I wouldn’t pay off the student loan right now, but not for the reason you are thinking. I believe you need to keep the money in emergency savings, not just for an out-and-out emergency like an unexpected medical bill, but because you might need it to get started on the next stage of your life.

My advice? Give yourself a set period of time to get a tenure track position. And if that doesn’t happen, start contemplating another, more steady career where you can put your obviously well-developed skills to good use.

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)

Dear Helaine: I’m in my mid-50s, and I left the workforce (where I made low six figures and socked away money) to move back to a city I left decades ago and back to my parents’ home to take care of them. They are both in their early 80s and ill with neurological diseases that rob you of movement or mind, but don’t actually cause death. Both need more and more help, and it’s expensive. They have no long-term-care insurance; it’ll all be out of pocket.

They have a net worth of about $2 million and receive about $12,000 a month from a pension, Social Security and required distributions. I’m trying to figure out how to best invest their money (I have power of attorney) to cover their increasing medical costs, yet also leave me and my sibling (he lives in Europe and gets half of what’s left) something to somewhat make up for the cost of leaving the workforce to care for them full time.

Family values have always been that we earn our own way, so their view is that “we can spend it all.” Technically, I support that, but I really supported that before I had to leave the workforce and stop making my own money and contributing to my own Social Security and savings. What’s your advice? -- Dutiful Daughter

Dear Dutiful Daughter: I reached out to Carolyn McClanahan, a certified financial planner specializing in medical expenses and issues, on your behalf. She and I agree. The first thing you need to settle is what you are going to get paid in return for giving up a six-figure job to take care of mom and dad.

If you make this a formal arrangement, you can get paid market rate, still continue to contribute to Social Security, and your parents can deduct it as a medical expense on their taxes. I also think it would be beyond fair if you received some additional compensation in their will as well, especially since your sibling is leaving all this caretaking to you.

If your mom and dad won’t do all that, you need to seriously re-evaluate returning to your professional career. It’s one thing to teach a child to earn her own way, but it’s not fair to prevent her from doing so. One thing you do not need to worry about: If your parents have an income of $12,000 a month, combined with their substantial assets, they will likely be able to afford both assisted living and live-in aides. You don’t need to sacrifice your financial future, not to mention your personal and professional lives, to make sure they are taken care of adequately.

As for investments, I would attempt to calculate what your parents' cash needs will be going forward before coming up with an investment plan. It’s quite possible they will need to move into assisted living or even a nursing home at some point in the future, and money will need to be available for that. There is only so much a middle-aged daughter can or should be expected to do.

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)

Dear Helaine: I like to be generous. A friend and I went to dinner at a restaurant at my recommendation. I tried to pay for our dinner with some gift cards I had. She tried to make me use them only on myself. She spoiled my enjoyment of our dinner. Why couldn’t she just enjoy the dinner and the fact that I wanted to use my gift cards on her? -- Generous Pal

Dear Generous Pal: You mean well, you really do. You wanted to go to a particular restaurant, and you wanted a friend to join you. You wanted to use a gift card, and you absolutely did right to offer to cover the cost of the meal. Personally, I think it’s a bit tacky to use a gift certificate to pay for your share of the bill for a meal and not make that gesture. Clearly, you agree with me!

However, here’s what you can’t do: You can’t force anyone to accept your generosity. No matter how much you wanted to pay the bill, no matter if the person you were dining with could use a bit of financial help, there’s no way. We can’t control other people. As long as you tried to do the right thing, I don’t think you should have allowed it to impact your enjoyment of the meal and time with your friend.

In the future, I would suggest explaining in advance that you have a gift card and would like to use it to cover the both of you. This way, you aren’t putting anyone on the spot, and you can enjoy the meal however you both pay for it.

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)