How many of you remember your mom or dad washing your mouth out with soap when you said a bad word or got caught lying? I don’t know if it’s still a common practice, but many people of my generation remember the awful taste this left in their mouths and dutifully passed this teaching opportunity to their children.

My dad always told me, “Think before you speak.” Easier said than done. However, over the years you learn NOT to use certain words that you know will invite a negative reaction or worse.

Words matter. They can lift up or they can knock down. They can unite or divide. They can paint a masterpiece idea or rust an ironclad agreement. Use your words wisely.

You can be bright and cheerful on the inside, but your words and behavior can sabotage your best efforts. I have compiled a list of phrases that you should banish from your workplace vocabulary.

-- “It’s impossible.” Any variation of “I can’t do that” will generally mark you as someone who doesn’t want to work hard or take on a new challenge. Unless you’re being asked to violate the laws of physics (or your state), make an honest effort to do what’s asked of you.

-- “That’s not my job.” Teamwork is essential to any organization’s success. Don’t hide behind your job description to get out of assignments you don’t like. Too many people take their job descriptions so literally, often ignoring the “and other duties as necessary.” If you’re too busy, or the task is outside your field of expertise, say so. If not, do your best to accommodate requests and follow instructions whether or not they’re officially part of your job.

-- “I’ll try.” Too often this can be seen as an alibi. You’ll make some effort, but you’re not really committed to success. Replace “try” with “will” to motivate yourself -- and to inspire other people’s confidence in you. Learn from the wisdom of Yoda, the "Star Wars" Jedi master: “Do or do not. There is no try.” They don’t pay off on effort; they pay off on results.

-- “It’s not fair.” You don’t want to get a reputation as a whiner. Complaining about every injustice or slight at work will alienate the people you want to get along with. Focus on doing your job to the best of your ability, whatever happens.

-- “Who comes up with this stuff?” Yes, we’ve all thought it. And there are times when it is a completely legitimate question. But I will guarantee you, the minute that sentiment is uttered aloud, the boss who proposed the idea will appear around a corner and wonder who is unwilling to give it a go.

-- “That’s bizarre/stupid/unreasonable.” Don’t be offensive and demean a co-worker. This shows you are not a team player. Ask for details to see if you have misunderstood what is being proposed. If you don’t like the idea, explain why politely. It always helps to have a workable solution in your back pocket too.

-- “You should have ...” Avoid anything that sounds like you’re searching for blame or scapegoats instead of solutions. Try to join forces instead. Ask what happened so you can figure out what to do next. And keep in mind that many great ideas have sprung up from mistakes on the first go-round. (We prefer to call that “research.”)

-- “That’s the way we’ve always done it.” When anything’s been done the same way for a long time, sometimes it’s a good sign it’s being done the wrong way. So, what am I saying? Think big, think bold, think creative, think stretch, think quantum leaps. Sometimes it’s risky not to take a risk.

-- “This may be a dumb question, but ...” Don’t diminish your point before you’ve even made it. What is really dumb is to proceed when you don’t understand what you are supposed to do or what outcome you are seeking.

I have always thought that some of the best communication advice ever offered came from Thumper, the young bunny in the Disney movie “Bambi”: “If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.” It’s so much easier to have said nothing than to have to try to walk back a thoughtless statement.

As President Calvin Coolidge said, “I have never been hurt by anything I didn’t say.”

Mackay’s Moral: Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can come back to haunt you.

A young woman was starting her career and leaving her parents' home when her father pulled her aside and said, "There are only three things you need to make a big success in this world -- three strong bones."

"Three bones?" the young woman asked.

"Three bones," her father repeated. "A wishbone, a jawbone and a backbone.

"You need a strong wishbone to dream big and imagine a life of endless possibilities," he said.

"Your jawbone is to ask for help when you need it," he continued. "Speak your mind when you have to and raise insightful questions to feed your curiosity and your intellect.

"Finally," he added, "your backbone gives you the courage, effort and determination you'll need to achieve your goals."

When it comes to a wishbone or dreaming, it's important to aim high -- to have dreams that inspire you to go beyond your perceived limits. Show me someone who doesn't dream about the future, and I'll show you someone who doesn't know where he or she is going.

Indecision can destroy your dreams, if you allow it. Dr. Seuss, the author of the beloved children's books, identified this common workplace malady in "Oh, The Places You'll Go." He takes the reader on a journey along beautiful streets and into wide open fields under clear blue skies. Then, there's a crossroads and confusion. Suddenly, we're in what he calls "The Waiting Place" -- a place where people just wait because they can't make up their minds or because they are afraid of change.

I often joke that it takes years to become an overnight success. But it starts with a dream. My dream was to own a factory. I wasn't even sure what kind of product I'd make, or exactly where it would be. But I pictured myself walking the factory floor, talking to workers. The pile of broken-down machines I bought might have looked more like a nightmare at the time. But dreams come true -- with a lot of wide-awake work.

I like to say: If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it -- if you are truly determined.

As for a jawbone, we all need help at some time. Don't be afraid to seek out advice. Consult someone you already know and trust. That person can usually lead you to someone who can help you if different skills are necessary. Use an expert to find another expert in the same profession. In other words, don't ask a lawyer to help you choose a doctor. Good advice is never cheap. And cheap advice is seldom good.

Successful people rarely reach the top without a lot of help along the way. The ability and willingness to ask for help is one trait that really stands out among those who are truly committed to success.

Ask questions -- a lot of them. I ask a lot of questions. There's so much information out there, and I want only the good stuff. I want information that will help me make the right decisions. There is an art to asking questions and discovering what is central to your success. Here's the secret: What is it that you really need to know? To get a good answer, ask a good question.

And don't be afraid to speak up. I received some good parental advice from my father, who told me: "If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up." And I would add to that, if you don't speak up, prepare to put up.

The backbone may be the most important bone of all. Courage is regarded as one of the major human virtues. Courage is bravery, valor, standing up to danger, guts and nerve all rolled into one. It's easier to be ordinary. Courage is what sets you apart from the crowd.

Determination is what keeps us hammering away. Determined people possess the stamina and courage to pursue their ambitions despite criticism, ridicule or unfavorable circumstances. In our culture of instant gratification, the attributes of patience and determination are hard to find.

I remember when I was first starting out in sales, I asked an experienced colleague I respected how many calls he would make on a prospect before giving up. He told me, "It depends on which one of us dies first."

Mackay's Moral: If you want to be able to do the heavy lifting required for success, start building strong bones.

We all need to laugh more, especially around tax time! I received so many positive responses to my column on humorous stories with good business lessons, I decided to do a sequel.

It’s been my experience that people remember information better when the message has a fun twist to it -- a punch line of sorts. These stories follow a similar theme: using your head and your sense of humor.

Think: It’s the hardest, most valuable task any person performs. You are driving in your car on a wicked stormy night. You pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the bus: 1) An older woman who looks as if she is about to die; 2) An old friend who once saved your life; and 3) The perfect man or woman of your dreams. Which one would you choose to offer a ride, knowing there could only be one passenger in your car?

This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application. You could pick up the elderly woman because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the ideal chance to repay him. However, you may never be able to find your perfect dream person again.

The candidate who was hired out of 200 applicants had no trouble coming up with the answer. He said: “I would give the car keys to my old friend, and let him take the elderly woman to the hospital. Then I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the woman of my dreams.”

It’s easier to change your own mind than to have someone change it for you.

I love the story about two elk hunters who were flown to a remote valley in Alaska. By the end of the hunt, they had bagged four elk, and their pilot returned to take them out of the valley.

When the pilot saw the four elk, he said, "There's a problem. The plane can only carry two elk."

The hunters were outraged. They said, "Listen, we were here last year. The plane that carried us out was the same, the weather was the same, and we had four elk then too."

The pilot said, "OK, I guess you know best." So, they loaded up the plane and took off. The plane started climbing out of the valley, but it began to lose altitude, the engine sputtered and, finally, it crashed. As they stumbled from the wreckage, one hunter asked the other if he knew where they were.

He said, "I don't know for sure ... but I think we're about a mile from where we crashed last year."

Ask the right question to get the best answer. A carpenter entered a doctor’s office. The receptionist asked him why he was there.

“I have shingles,” the carpenter replied. And so, a nurse was summoned.

“Why are you here today?” she asked the carpenter.

“I have shingles,” was the answer.

She took his blood pressure, temperature, height, weight, and told him to change into a gown and wait for the doctor.

When the doctor came in, the carpenter told him again, “I have shingles.”

“Where?” the doctor asked.

By now, the carpenter was losing his patience. “Where do you think? Outside, in my truck.”

Those who don’t know don’t know they don’t know. A classic story illustrates this point. A minister, a Boy Scout and a computer executive were flying to a meeting in a small private plane. About halfway to their destination, the pilot came back and announced that the plane was going to crash and that there were only three parachutes for the four people.

The pilot said, "I am going to use one of the parachutes because I have a wife and four small children," and he jumped.

The computer executive said, "I should have one of the parachutes because I am the smartest man in the world and my company needs me," and he jumped.

The minister turned to the Boy Scout and, smiling sadly, said, "You are young and I have lived a good, long life, so you take the last parachute and I'll go down with the plane."

The boy scout said, "Relax, reverend, the smartest man in the world just strapped on my backpack and jumped out of the plane!"

Mackay’s Moral: He or she who laughs, lasts!