life

Be Respectful, Not Neglectful

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | February 23rd, 2015

One of my favorite old comedians, the late Rodney Dangerfield, was famous for his line, "I get no respect." Then he would usually add something like, "I remember when I was a kid and played hide-and-seek. The other kids wouldn't even look for me."

If you want those who work with you to respect you more, try this simple tactic. Ask their opinions, and really listen to what they have to say. When done well, this is a powerful workplace practice that produces tremendously positive outcomes. Then, take action from what you learn. Employees will feel validated, and you will become someone people will flock to.

Example: Jack, a manager, is talking to Judy, who works for him. He asks her what she thinks of a new company policy. Judy answers with a thoughtful opinion. But as she is telling Jack what she thinks, Jack sees his boss walk by. Jack wants to ask his boss something important, and his mind focuses on that instead of on what Judy is saying.

Judy sees that Jack is no longer making eye contact or listening to her -- even though he solicited her opinion. She stops mid-sentence. Jack is so lost in thinking about his question to his boss that he doesn't even notice that Judy has stopped talking for a few seconds.

Embarrassed that he has been caught being inattentive, Jack tries to cover up the fact that he wasn't listening. Judy politely skims over the incident and says she needs to get back to work. Later, Jack overhears Judy telling a co-worker about the incident. "What a jerk," she says. "He asked me for my opinion like he cared. And I was dumb enough to think he did."

Jack flinched at her words. He knew he appeared not to care, even though he wanted to hear her ideas. He realized that he had damaged his relationship with an employee. He knew that he had to make an effort to be a better listener in the future, and vowed to repair the damage over time. He also knew that he had learned one of the most valuable lessons a manager can learn: Listening to what his employees have to say is a priority and should be treated as one.

Of course, when I think about respect, Aretha Franklin immediately comes to mind. Her blockbuster hit "R-E-S-P-E-C-T" is timeless. As the lyrics advise, find out what respect means to employees.

Half of all American employees think they're not treated with respect by their employers or managers, according to the website discoverysurveys.com. When this happens, employees tend to lose respect for their bosses and don't trust them. They also become resentful, less motivated and no longer committed to their employers.

To minimize this problem, treating people with respect has to begin at the top of an organization. If senior managers treat each other and their subordinates with respect, this sets the stage for respect among all employees.

Employee suggestions should be acted upon, rather than just ignored or ridiculed. Simply asking for input will gain some employee respect, but acting upon good suggestions is an imperative. Employees must also be given credit for the idea.

Allowing for scheduling flexibility gives employees the idea that their employers respect them enough to let them get their work done according to their own schedule. Letting them come in late or leave early on occasion is a strong way of showing respect and trust.

Making employees aware of the financial condition of the company and the reasons for various decisions also lets them know the company trusts them. If cost-cutting is necessary, solicit ideas from them. Inviting their input demonstrates respect for their opinions. An added bonus is that the people in the trenches have a unique and valuable perspective.

Investing in employee training and career development is an investment in the employees themselves. They will respect the company that provides it.

As you work to reach your goals, remember that others also have goals and are also working hard. Respect people for what they are and for what they stand for -- even if you don't agree.

Mackay's Moral: Be respectful or be regretful.

life

Lessons From Washington

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | February 16th, 2015

As a history major, I am intrigued by the origins of our great country. George Washington is a logical place to start.

This week, we celebrate his and Abraham Lincoln's birthday on Presidents Day.

But what do we really know about this Founding Father who led our country through the Revolutionary War?

In 2002, Stephen Kinzer wrote in The New York Times: "By comparing textbooks used in the 1960s with those of today, researchers at Mount Vernon, Washington's home in Virginia, have concluded that Washington now occupies just 10 percent of the space he had then."

This is a shame, because, besides many other reasons, some of the business lessons that Washington espoused are still relevant today. He was the definition of a pragmatist. He was very practical and had a straightforward, matter-of-fact approach. He was always focused on reaching a goal.

He was incredibly smart and shrewd. As commander in chief of the American forces, Washington refused a regular salary and worked for expenses only. When offered the U.S. presidency, he volunteered to work for expenses again -- but this time Congress insisted he have a fixed salary.

Among his writings was this advice to his nephew, Bushrod Washington, on Jan. 15, 1783: "Be courteous to all, but intimate with few; and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation. Let your heart feel for the afflictions and distress of every one, and let your hand give in proportion to your purse, remembering ... that it is not everyone that asketh that deserveth charity; all, however, are worthy of the inquiry, or the deserving may suffer."

And to General William Woodford, he wrote: "... be strict in your discipline; that is, to require nothing unreasonable of your officers and men, but see that whatever is required be punctually complied with. Reward and punish every man according to his merit, without partiality or prejudice; hear his complaints, if well founded, redress them; if otherwise, discourage them, in order to prevent frivolous ones. Discourage vice in every shape, and impress upon the mind of every man, from the first to the lowest, the importance of the cause, and what it is they are contending for."

His leadership lessons are worth noting also.

One reason the U.S. Congress has two houses can be found in the following conversation attributed to Washington and Thomas Jefferson. Jefferson, who did not attend the Constitutional Convention, was not happy with the proposed bicameral system for the legislative branch of the new government. During a visit to Washington at his home, Jefferson argued for the French unicameral system, one legislative house.

After much discussion around the tea table, Washington turned sharply to Jefferson and said, "You, sir, have just demonstrated by your own hand the superior excellence of the bicameral system."

"How is that?" asked Jefferson.

"You just poured your tea from your cup into its saucer to cool. In the same manner, we want the bicameral system to cool things. A measure originates in one house, and in heat is passed. The other house will serve as a wonderful cooler, and by the time it is debated and modified by various amendments, it is much more likely to become an equitable law. No, we can't get along without the saucer in our system."

life

The Power of Listening

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | February 9th, 2015

Two friends were walking down a busy street one evening when one paused and said, "Listen to those crickets chirping."

"What crickets?" said the other person. "I don't hear any crickets. Hey, you!" He waved down a woman passing by. "Do you hear crickets around here?"

"No," the woman said, and went on her way.

The first man closed his eyes for a moment, then walked to a mailbox on a nearby lawn, reached down, and picked a cricket up from the grass.

"That's amazing!" said his friend. "How did you hear that?"

"Watch," the first man said.

He dug into his pocket for a handful of change and tossed some coins onto the sidewalk. Immediately, the door of a house opened, a car stopped and two passersby stopped to look for the coins.

The first man shrugged. "It all depends on what you're listening for."

We are born with two ears, but only one mouth. Some people say that's because we should spend twice as much time listening as talking. Others claim it's because listening is twice as difficult as talking.

Whatever the reason, developing good listening skills is critical to success. There is a difference between hearing and listening. Pay attention! Your next job/account/paycheck may depend on it.

These statistics, which I've gathered over the years from sources including the International Listening Association website, really drive home the importance of listening. At the same time, they demonstrate how difficult listening can be:

-- 85 percent of our learning is derived from listening.

-- Listeners are distracted, forgetful and preoccupied 75 percent of the time.

-- Most listeners recall only 50 percent of what they have heard immediately after hearing someone say it.

-- People spend 45 percent of their waking time listening.

-- Most people remember only about 20 percent of what they hear over time.

-- People listen up to 450 words per minute, but think at about 1,000 to 3,000 words per minute.

-- There have been at least 35 business studies indicating listening as a top skill needed for success.

In addition, there are a number of behaviors to avoid if you want to be a really good listener: interrupting, avoiding eye contact, rushing the speaker and letting your attention wander. Don't rush ahead and finish the speaker's thoughts, because you might take them in the wrong direction. Arguing, as with a "yes, but" response, indicates that you were more interested in getting your own point across than listening to others. Trying to top the speaker's story doesn't win you any points either.

Listening can be hard work, and some people are more challenging to listen to than others, but when you find yourself tuning out what someone is saying you should ask yourself why.

If you want people to listen to what you're saying, make sure they feel like you have listened to them. When we feel we are being listened to, it makes us feel like we are being taken seriously and what we say really matters.

In his book, "The 8th Habit," management guru Stephen Covey tells a true story about the importance of asking other people their opinions.

Covey says J. W. "Bill" Marriott, executive chairman and chairman of the board of Marriott International, the world's largest hotel chain, described to him "the biggest lesson I have learned through the years."

It is, said Marriott, "to listen to your people. I find that if you have senior managers who really gather their people around them, get their ideas and listen to their input ... you make a lot better decisions."

Marriott said he learned this lesson from an encounter with President Dwight Eisenhower when Marriott was a young ensign in the Navy.

"I ... had been in the Navy for six months and had come home from the Supply Corps School for Christmas. U.S. Secretary of Agriculture Ezra Taft Benson came down to our farm with General Eisenhower."

Marriott said it was extremely cold outside, but that his father had put up targets outside for shooting. He asked the president if he wanted to go outside and shoot or stay by the fire.

"He just turned to me," said Marriott, "and asked, 'What do you think, ensign?'"

Marriott said he told the president it was too cold outside for shooting and to stay inside by the fire, which he did.

Marriott said that lesson, asking and listening to someone else's opinion, has stayed with him and has been a big asset in his business.

Mackay's Moral: It's amazing what you'll hear if you just listen.

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