The 72nd annual Yellville (Arkansas) Turkey Trot, which took place on Oct. 14, is famous for its Turkey Drop, in which live turkeys are dropped from a low-flying airplane and then chased by festivalgoers. This year, KY3.com reports, several turkeys were dropped during the afternoon despite animal-rights activists having filed a formal complaint with the sheriff's office, saying the pilot "terrorized" the birds. But pharmacist and past pilot Dana Woods told the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette: "We treat the turkeys right. That may sound ironic, but we don't abuse those turkeys. We coddle and pet those turkeys. We're good to them." Wild turkeys can fly, but in 2016, about a dozen turkeys were dropped and not all survived the fall. According to The Washington Post, over the past several years, local sponsors and the chamber of commerce have distanced themselves from the Turkey Drop, now more than five decades old. The Federal Aviation Administration is checking to see if any laws or regulations were broken, but said it has not intervened in past years because the turkeys are not considered to be projectiles. [KY3.com, 10/15/2017; Washington Post, 10/13/2017]

'Tis the Season

Could turkeys be sensing the peril of the season? Police in Bridgewater, Massachusetts, tweeted a warning to the town's residents on Oct. 15 about aggressive wild turkeys, WBZ-TV reported. As proof, an accompanying video showed four turkeys chasing a Bridgewater police cruiser, but police were not as amused as their Twitter followers. "Aggressive turkeys are a problem in town," the department tweeted. "State law doesn't allow the police or (animal control) to remove them." [WBZ-TV, 10/17/2017]

Update

In 1990, Marlene Warren, 40, answered her door in Wellington, Florida, and was shot in the face by a clown bearing balloons (one of which read "You're the greatest!") and flowers. On Sept. 26, Palm Beach County Sgt. Richard McAfee announced that Warren's widower's current wife, Sheila Keen Warren, 54, had been arrested for the murder, 27 years after the fact, and taken into custody in Abingdon, Virginia. Sheila Keen married Michael Warren in 2002, NBC News reported. (Warren went to prison in 1994 for odometer tampering, grand theft and racketeering in connection with his car rental agency.) Sheila had worked for him, repossessing cars, and they were reportedly having an affair when the murder took place. While Sheila had always been a suspect, new technology finally allowed prosecutors to retest DNA evidence and build a case against her. [NBC News, 9/27/2017]

Sex Therapy

Zookeepers believe China's 4-year-old giant panda Meng Meng, currently on loan to the Berlin Zoo, displays her displeasure with her surroundings, food or caretakers by walking backward. "Meng Meng is in puberty," zoo director Andreas Knieriem explained to the Berliner Zeitung newspaper on Oct. 22. "The reverse walk is a protest." To address the situation, zookeepers will introduce Meng Meng to Jiao Qing, a male giant panda three years older, who presumably will ease her frustration by engaging in sexual activity with her. [Reuters, 10/22/2017]

Lucky!

Kenyans Gilbert Kipleting Chumba and David Kiprono Metto were among the favorites to win the Venice Marathon on Oct. 22. Instead, Eyob Ghebrehiwet Faniel, 25, a local running in only his second marathon, took the prize after the lead runners were led several hundred meters off-course by an errant guide motorcycle. Faniel is the first Italian man to win the Venice Marathon in 22 years. "Today's race shows that the work is paying off," Faniel said following his victory. Uh, sure. [NPR, 10/23/2017]

Most Considerate Criminal

Nelly's Taqueria in Hicksville, New York, suffered a break-in on Oct. 3, but the burglar redefined the term "clean getaway." Surveillance video showed a man donning food-service gloves and starting a pot of water to boil before hammering open the cash register. He secured $100 in his pockets, leaving a dollar in the tip jar, then started "cooking up a storm," owner Will Colon told Newsday. Cameras recorded as the thief cooked beans, sauteed shrimp and chicken, and helped himself to a cold soda before enjoying his meal standing up. "The way he handled that pan, man, the dude had some skills," Colon said. Afterward, he carefully stored the leftovers in the refrigerator, cleaned his pans and wiped down all the surfaces he had used. Then he took off through the back window, the same way he had come in. [Newsday, 10/4/2017]

People Different From Us

-- In Lissone, Italy, 40-year-old fitness instructor Laura Mesi made news when she married herself in late September. "I told my relatives and friends that if I had not found my soul mate, I would marry myself by my 40th birthday," Mesi said, according to The Independent. She spent more than 10,000 euros ($11,700) for the occasion, which included a white wedding dress, a three-tiered cake, bridesmaids and 70 guests. Mesi is part of a self-marrying movement dubbed "sologamy" that has followers all over the world. Her marriage holds no legal significance. "If tomorrow I find a man to build a future with, I will be happy, but my happiness will not depend on him," Mesi declared. [The Independent, 9/27/2017]

-- An anonymous collector from Palm Beach, Florida, was the winning bidder in an Oct. 11 online auction for a half-smoked cigar that British Prime Minister Winston Churchill enjoyed during a 1947 trip to Paris. AP reports the 4-inch cigar remnant brought just over $12,000 in the auction managed by Boston-based RR Auction. The company says Churchill smoked the cigar on May 11, 1947, at Le Bourget Airport. A British airman, Cpl. William Alan Turner, kept the cigar after he and his crew flew Churchill and his wife between Paris and London. The label on the Cuban stogie includes Churchill's name. [Associated Press, 10/12/2017]

Least Competent Criminal

Greensburg, Pennsylvania, police made a traffic stop on Oct. 19 and found drug paraphernalia in plain sight on the car's front seat. When police asked where the occupants had obtained the heroin found in the center console, they said they had bought it from someone named Cody in the maternity ward at the Excela Health Westmoreland hospital in Greensburg. Officers arrested Cody R. Hulse, 25, at the hospital after he admitted to possessing and selling heroin just feet away from his newborn daughter. The Tribune-Review reported that police found 34 stamp bags of heroin, four empty bags and multiple hypodermic needles in Hulse's possession. "I have an issue myself with drugs ... heroin," Hulse told them. "I really didn't want to bring it in." Hulse's girlfriend, the mother of the newborn, said she did not know he was selling drugs from the room. [Tribune-Review, 10/20/2017]

Crime Report

Coroner's pathologist Elmo A. Griggs, 75, was arrested Sept. 12 in Morgan County, Indiana, for drunken driving, but it was what was rolling around in the back of his pickup truck that caught officers' attention. Along with a half-empty vodka bottle, Griggs was transporting several labeled totes, according to the Indianapolis Star, containing organic material. Marshal Bradley K. Shaw of the Brooklyn Police Department said early investigations showed the totes contained brain and liver samples. Griggs' wife posted on Facebook that he "had a bad day and had a couple of drinks before driving home," but court documents revealed he failed all field sobriety tests. [Indianapolis Star, 9/13/2017]

It's Good to Have Goals

Alysha Orrok of Portsmouth, New Hampshire, will head to Las Vegas in February to compete for the $10,000 prize in the National Grocers Association 2018 Best Bagger contest, reports The New York Times. Orrok, who recently won the New Hampshire competition, is a teacher who moonlights at a Hannaford Supermarket. Competitors are judged on multiple skills, including speed, weight distribution, appearance and technique. [New York Times, 10/13/2017]

Quick-thinking paramedics in Dorset, England, saved the life of a man whose fishing outing went south when a dover sole jumped down his throat and blocked his windpipe on Oct. 5. Sam Quilliam, 28, had just caught the 5 1/2-inch-long fish and went to give it a kiss when it wriggled free and lodged in his throat. "I ran round the pier like a headless chicken and then passed out," Quilliam told The Guardian. When first responders arrived, Quilliam was not breathing, but friends were performing CPR. Paramedic Matt Harrison said: "It was clear that we needed to get the fish out or this patient was not going to survive. ... I was able to eventually dislodge the tip of the tail and very carefully, so as not to break the tail off, I tried to remove it -- although the fish's barbs and gills were getting stuck on the way back up." Finally, the fish "came out in one piece," Harrison said. Quilliam said his brush with death won't put him off fishing. "Once I am back at work and fit, I will probably get back at it again," he said. [The Guardian, 10/13/2017]

What's in a Name?

Carrie L. Hitt, 42, of Junction City, Oregon, died after her Ford Bronco left the road on Territorial Highway and rolled on Oct. 4. Hitt was ejected from her car and then struck by a second vehicle, driven by Nadine M. Killmaster, 32, of Yakima, Washington. Oregon State Police told The Register-Guard they believe Hitt was using a mobile phone just before the crash. [Register-Guard, 10/6/2017]

Horsing Around

-- Lindsey Partridge of Ontario, Canada, booked herself at a pet-friendly Super 8 in Georgetown, Kentucky, for the Retired Racehorse Project's Thoroughbred Makeover on Oct. 4. At check-in, Partridge asked the front desk clerk if the pet policy included horses, to which the clerk answered, "Aw, I wouldn't mind. You could do that." So Partridge returned to her horse trailer and brought Blizz, her retired racehorse, into the hotel. Partridge and Blizz took a video and a few photos in the room, but eventually Partridge took Blizz to the Kentucky Horse Park, where the rooms are more suited to equine visitors. The Lexington Herald-Leader reported that Blizz took third place in the trail competition during the event. [Lexington Herald-Leader, 10/14/2017]

-- Meanwhile, in Iowa, a pair of women stopped at a traffic light in Altoona in October looked at the car next to them and saw a horse staring back from the back seat. "This is the most Iowa thing that has EVER happened to me," Hannah Waskel tweeted, along with a video of the miniature horse. "We started laughing and the people driving the horse saw us and waved," Hannah told UPI. "They even rolled the window down for the horse." [United Press International, 10/16/2017]

Questionable Judgment

Tucson, Arizona, firefighters were called on Oct. 15 to a mobile home park after a resident there tried to remove spiderwebs from beneath his trailer using a propane torch, but ended up setting his home on fire. KVOA-TV reported that the unnamed man's elderly mother, who also lived there, suffered minor injuries while being carried out of the mobile home with the help of neighbors. [KVOA-TV, 10/16/2017]

Wait, What?

U.S. Customs and Border Protection agents at Dallas Fort Worth International Airport made an unusual discovery in the luggage of a traveler arriving from Vietnam in October: 54 illegal bird nests. The nests, which are considered a delicacy in some countries, are built out of solidified bird saliva and are used to make soup and broth, reported UPI. However, they are banned from entering the United States because they may carry infectious diseases. The nests were destroyed. [United Press International, 10/13/2017]

What We'll Do for Love

The Daily World in Centralia, Washington, reported that Rachel A. Deckert, 27, tried to turn herself in at the Lewis County Jail on an outstanding DUI warrant on Aug. 21, but was turned away because she brought along her partner -- literally glued to Deckert by her pinky finger. When Deckert tried again the next day, still attached to her partner, police and firefighters were called. The two women were attached by a copper elbow pipe into which they had each inserted a pinky finger secured with "some kind of epoxy," a firefighter said. They told authorities they had been that way about a week at the suggestion of a couples therapy counselor. "They haven't been able to feel their fingers for three days," said police detective Patty Finch. Efforts to separate the women were unsuccessful, and Deckert was released with advice to seek medical attention. [Daily World, 8/22/2017]

Timing Is Everything

Eva Pandora Baldursdottir, a member of the Icelandic parliament from the Pirate Party, was scheduled to take part in a debate on Oct. 12, according to UPI, but an unexpected injury lent her an especially jaunty look for the televised event: She had to conduct the debate wearing an eye patch after her toddler daughter scratched her eye. "Sometimes astounding things can happen at the worst time," Baldursdottir shared on Facebook, along with a photo of her wearing the eye patch. [United Press International, 10/13/2017]

Awesome!

For the last time, Flight 666, traveling from Copenhagen, Denmark, to HEL (Finland's Helsinki-Vantaa airport), took off on Friday the 13th of October. A Finnair spokesman said the flight, questionably numbered for the superstitious among us, has been making the trip for 11 years and has flown on Friday the 13th 21 times. "Today will actually be the final time that our AY666 flight flies to HEL," a spokesman told The Telegraph. Some Finnair flights are getting new numbers, and the infamous route will be renumbered to 954. The flight arrived safely in Helsinki. [The Telegraph, 10/13/2017]

Bright Ideas

-- Malcolm Applegate, 62, of Birmingham, England, couldn't take life with his demanding wife anymore, so 10 years ago he escaped. Applegate spent five of those years living in the woods near Kingston, until applying to live at a homeless charity called Emmaus Greenwich Center in South London, Fox News reported. "Without a word to anyone, not even family, I packed up and left ... I went missing for 10 years," Applegate said. "I enjoyed my life," he wrote in a blog on the Emmaus Greenwich website, but says he's grateful to the charity for encouraging him to reconnect with his sister. As for his wife, there has been no reaction from her to Applegate's reappearance. [Fox News, 10/17/2017]

-- Residents of Rogersville, Missouri, are protesting a high school fundraising plan to convert an abandoned funeral home into a haunted house, according to KY3.com, calling the idea distasteful and insensitive. The Preston-Marsh Funeral Home had been scheduled for demolition, but the owner gave permission to students from Logan-Rogersville High School to use it at the end of October to raise money for a safe graduation celebration for seniors. Students said they would use leftover equipment such as gurneys to enhance the spooky experience. But one Rogersville resident said doing so is "akin to opening a strip club in an old church." [KY3.com, 10/12/2017]

Oops!

In Vero Beach, Florida, a husband and wife made a hot bet on the Dallas Cowboys vs. Green Bay Packers football game on Oct. 8: The loser would set their team's jersey on fire. When the Packers won, the husband, 27, took his blue and silver Cowboys jersey outside and set fire to it. But, as he later told sheriff's deputies, because he was drunk, he then tried to put the jersey back on, and that's when things got heated. Family members pulled the burning jersey off the man and rushed him to the Indian River Medical Center. A witness told the Sebastian Daily "skin was hanging off his arm and back." He suffered second- and third-degree burns to his hand, arm and back. [Sebastian Daily, 10/9/2017]

Unclear on the Concept

An unnamed Colorado woman apparently defied death when a train rolled over her near Whitewater, Colorado, on Oct. 15. The woman was sleeping on the tracks and wearing earphones when one engine rolled completely over her before the train could stop. She was then removed from the tracks and refused medical attention. Lands End Fire Protection District chief Brian Lurvey told the Grand Junction Daily Sentinel he was not sure whether she had been cited by Union Pacific for sleeping on the tracks. [Grand Junction Daily Sentinel, 10/15/2017]

Bryant Johnson of Casper, Wyoming, was on a mission on Oct. 2 when police responded to a call about a man warning citizens of an alien invasion coming next year. KTWO Radio in Casper reported that Johnson told police he had traveled back in time from 2048, explaining that the aliens filled his body with alcohol and had him stand on a giant pad that transported him back to 2017 -- although he was supposed to arrive in 2018. He also asked to speak with the "president of the town." Instead, Bryant was arrested for public intoxication. [KTWO Radio, 10/9/2017]

Farm Animals Gone Wild

The owners of a mischievous ass in Vogelsberg, Hesse, Germany, have been ordered to pay for damages after Vitus the donkey apparently mistook an orange McLaren Spider sports car for a carrot. When Markus Zahn left his $411,000 car parked next to a paddock on Sept. 16, 2016, he returned to find that Vitus had nibbled on its paint to the tune of almost $7,000 in damage. "The donkey had insurance, but the insurance didn't want to pay," Zahn told the BBC. Vitus's rap sheet also includes biting a Mercedes. [BBC, 9/28/2017]

Oops!

In Romania, it takes more than foul weather or a damaged field to stop football. On Sept. 24, a match between Bistrita Brosteni and Vanatorul Dorna Candrenilor was abandoned just 58 minutes in after all the teams' balls ended up in the nearby Bistrita River, according to the Hindustan Times. Bistrita was winning 2-0 when they ran out of balls. Fans suggested they might find the balls at the Bicaz dam nearby. [Hindustan Times, 9/28/2017]

Creeps on Parade

-- Samantha the intelligent sex doll suffered a number of indignities at the Ars Electronica Festival in Linz, Austria, in early September. Sergi Santos of Barcelona, Spain, who developed Samantha, said men at the show acted "like barbarians. Two fingers were broken. She was heavily soiled." Samantha, who talks, is also programmed to react when someone touches her. Santos told Metro News that Samantha would have to undergo repairs and cleaning, but she "can endure a lot. She will pull through." [Metro News, 9/27/2017]

-- Metro News also reports that women in Middlesbrough, Cleveland, England, have contacted police about a mysterious man handing out provocative notes in the streets. The notes begin: "No offence intended. You are simply a female that caught my eye. ... I am looking for a possible private arrangement. If you understand my meaning." The man has handed out several of the notes, one to a 14-year-old girl at Middlesbrough Bus Station. Her sister called the phone number at the bottom of the note and said the voice "sounded foreign." She went on: "It made me feel a bit uncomfortable and it set off my anxiety." [Metro News, 10/2/2017]

DO NOT EAT!

Doctors thought a 47-year-old postman in Preston, Lancashire, England, who complained of a persistent cough might have cancer, as he was a long-term smoker whose X-rays showed a spot on his lung. But when they removed the mass, the BBC reported, they found the "long-lost Playmobil traffic cone" the patient had received as a gift on his seventh birthday. He told doctors he had regularly swallowed the small pieces as a child and believed he had inhaled the tiny cone. Happy ending: After the toy was removed, the man's cough almost disappeared and his other symptoms improved. [BBC, 9/26/2017]

Corporate Shenanigans

The Russian division of Burger King has asked the country's Federal Anti-Monopoly Service to ban Stephen King's horror movie "It" from showing in Russian theaters because the clown character, Pennywise, looks too much like Ronald McDonald, and therefore the movie is advertising for McDonald's. However, the Hollywood Reporter noted, the movie opened in Russia on Sept. 7 and had already grossed millions of dollars by late September. A spokeswoman for the FAS, confirming that the complaint had been received, said, "We can't be concerned with the content of the film," but the agency would determine whether it contained advertising or product placement. [Hollywood Reporter, 9/26/2017]

Inexplicable

If you're already shopping for your 2018 calendar, Metro News recommends you don't overlook the Carponizer Carp Calendar, which features "12 beautiful carps with attractive women. On high quality paper." Oh, and the women are naked. Hendrik Pohler, 28, the calendar's creator, was struck with the idea when he was fishing with a friend "and at the spot next to us were two hot girls fishing," he told Maxim, which described the models as having "stiff, pained expressions." [Metro News, 10/3/2017]

Crime Report

Patrick Joseph Adams Jr., 36, of Great Falls, Montana, pulled the ultimate heist in July when he convinced two male friends and his girlfriend to help him "move out" of a house that wasn't his. One of the friends was suspicious when he saw a wall in the home dedicated to military service, but didn't remember that Adams had been in the service, the Great Falls Tribune reported. That friend left before the move was complete, but the rest of the group loaded about $40,000 worth of belongings into a U-Haul, requiring two trips. Later that evening, the true homeowner of the burglarized house called police and reported the theft, and through U-Haul records police were able to track Adams down. He was charged on Sept. 28 with burglary and criminal mischief. [Great Falls Tribune, 9/28/2017]

Bureaucracy in Action

Juana Escudero, 53, of Alcala de Guadaira, Spain, has been dead since May 13, 2010. Except she's still very much alive. FOX News reports that a Malaga, Spain, woman died on that date who shared Escudero's full name and birthdate. As a result, Escudero was pronounced dead by the government, which has given her headaches ever since. For instance, she can't renew her driver's license or go to the doctor. Finally, in April 2016, she tracked down the actual dead woman in Malaga, and in September of this year, she petitioned the courts to open the grave to prove that she is not the dead woman. She even offered to do a DNA test. "On the government's computers I am dead," Escudero said, "but for the banks I am alive and kicking." [FOX News, 9/27/2017]

Questionable Judgment

Minnesota State Police nabbed a motorcycle rider on Aug. 31 who was weaving in and out of traffic on Interstate 394 and performing stunts, all while wearing a panda suit, complete with an oversize animal head. The rider told police that the panda suit was meant to help his motorcycle videos "go viral," but police responded with a citation for reckless driving, and they confiscated the panda head. "A panda head will not protect you in a crash like a DOT-approved helmet would," police advised on their Facebook page. [United Press International, 10/3/2017]

Ironies

Samantha Faye Toope, 20, and Kelsie Laine Marie Mast, 23, inmates of the Edmonton (Alberta, Canada) Institution for Women, must have been pumped up about their successful escape from the prison on Oct. 2, so they headed to a downtown "escape room" -- a problem-solving and strategy game room where players are given limited time to find their way out. SideQuests Adventures owner Rebecca Liaw told CBC News that the women arrived at the business on Oct. 3 and inquired about the game. As Liaw explained how it works, five uniformed police officers arrived and handcuffed the cons, both of whom Edmonton police described as violent offenders with weapons offenses. "We get lots of interesting visitors," Liaw said, "but this is definitely top of the list." [CBC News, 10/4/2017]