The International New York Times edition published in Kuala Lumpur on Jan. 22 carried a page-one story noting increased worldwide demand by meat processors for pigs raised in the fresh air rather than enclosed in pens -- illustrated by a photograph of a cluster of pigs feeding in an outdoor stall. However, the Malaysian printer (who had downloaded the digital pages and set them to paper) had added black boxes to cover just the faces of each pig in the photo. "If there is picture of nudes or (the) like, this we will cover (up)," a publisher's spokesman told the Malay Mail. "This is a Muslim country." (The story, headline and photo were otherwise identical to the versions that appeared elsewhere in New York Times editions.) [Malay Mail (Kuala Lumpur, 1-22-2014]

-- The convenience beverage market got jumbled recently when, first, Oregon-based Union Wine Co. announced in November that it would soon sell its Underwood pinot gris and pinot noir in 12-ounce cans and, second, the London department store Selfridges unveiled a champagne vending machine for New Year's celebrations. (The French bottler Moet & Chandon offered bottles of bubbly behind glass doors for the equivalent of $29.) [The Oregonian, 11-25-2013] [Daily Telegraph, 11-15-2013]

-- Marketing Challenges: (1) "Does Germany really need a gourmet restaurant for dogs?" asked Berlin's Bild newspaper. Regardless, the Pets Deli in the Grunewald neighborhood of Berlin offers servings for the equivalent of about $4 to $6, either take-out or arranged in metal bowls on Pets Deli's floor. Said owner David Spanier, lauding his upscale, healthful treats, "Junk food is bad for animals." (2) Around Tokyo, "idle boredom is an impossible option," wrote Vice.com in December, as a reporter described a resort just out of town where one could swim in a pool of green tea, coffee, sake or (the most popular treat) wine. "A giant bottle of merlot" spilled into a pond the size of a minivan, he wrote (while braving the Yunessun resort's warnings not to drink from the pool). Though both-sex nudity is tolerated in Japan's hot springs spas, Yunessun discourages it. [Agence France-Presse via Yahoo News, 1-3-2014] [Vice.com, 12-10-2013]

-- The Joy of Researching: A team of Czech Republic researchers led by Vlastimil Hart, writing in Frontiers in Zoology in December, reported that dogs (among a few mammals), dealing with a nature's call, spontaneously align their body axis with the Earth's magnetic field. To reach that conclusion, the researchers said they observed 70 dogs of 37 breeds during defecation (1,893 observations) and urination (5,582) over a two-year period. [Frontiers in Zoology, 12-27-2013]

-- If We Can Do It, We Should Do It: (1) ThinkGeek.com has introduced the Tactical Laser-Guided Pizza Cutter, at a suggested $29.95, for helping to achieve straight-line precision in those difficult four-cut (eight-slice) pizza formulations. (2) From the Japanese lingerie manufacturer Ravijour comes a bra whose front clasp can be locked unless its built-in heart-rate monitor signifies that the heartbeat is characteristic of "true love." (Ravijour said it is still testing the bra.) [Huffington Post, 12-3-2013]

-- Man's BFFs: (1) The Battersea Dogs and Cats Home in Fulham, England, admitted in December that a rescued Staffordshire bull terrier, Barney, had a ladies' underwear-eating habit and that potential adopters should keep him away from laundry baskets. (In his first days at Battersea, officials say, he "passed" knickers three times.) (2) The Cairns (Australia) Veterinary Clinic warned in December of several reports of dogs becoming addicted to licking cane toads (which notoriously protect themselves by a venomous secretion that can be hallucinogenic). One vet told Brisbane's Courier-Mail of individual "serial lickers" treated for cane toad poisoning several times a year. [GetWestLondon.co.uk (Uxbridge), 12-19-2013] [Courier-Mail, 12-16-2013]

-- Who Knew That Racoons Were Easily Offended? The Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals condemned a Pet Expo in Greenhithe, England, in October after reports emerged that a trainer had showcased "Melanie," a racoon who rides a bicycle-like device, apparently to great acclaim. An RSPCA statement denounced the expo for "degrading" a "wild animal" in such a "demeaning light." [KentOnline (Medway City Estate, England), 10-29-2013]

-- Management Comes to the Terrorism Industry: (1) In November, the Army of Islam (Syrian rebels) announced, via a dazzling, fully functional website, that it had job "vacancies" in the fields of graphic design, photography, printing, journalism, reporting and media promotion and programming. The anti-Assad force already has a Facebook page featuring videos of alleged military victories. (2) Somalia's coastal pirates, having peaked in 2009 in boat captures, may now be laying low only because of the familiar business problem of "inventory management." A November analysis by Quartz (qz.com) showed the pirates with such a surplus of hijacked vessels (still with earnings potential) that they would likely wind those down before taking to the seas again. [BBC News, 11-6-2013] [Quartz, 11-11-2013]

-- Mumbai, India, has its share of Western-style financial advisers using computer programs familiar to Wall Street -- but with the additional layering of "financial astrologers," who forecast successes and failures based on the alignment of the planets, among other indicators. According to a Business Week report in September, the GaneshaSpeaks service (with inspiration by the elephant-headed Lord Ganesha, god of wisdom) claims 1,200 subscribers at the equivalent of about $80 a year. Said one astrologer, "Fund managers used to laugh at me." During crises, he said, "I'm constantly crunching market and planetary data." [Business Week, 10-3-2013]

-- A group of (legal) prostitutes in the Netherlands began a campaign in December to have their occupation officially termed so dangerous and physically challenging that they should be allowed (as soccer players are) to save in tax-free pension funds. They carry out "difficult physical work," their lawyer said, and their careers are likewise short-lived -- much better-suited for the young. Furthermore, he pointed out, prostitutes are not able, post-career, to earn money coaching or by endorsements. [BBC News, 12-17-2013]

-- American health-care reformers routinely decry the inability of consumer-patients to compare prices of services to help drive down the costs. Two doctors, writing for the Journal of the American Medical Association in December, illuminated the problem by surveying 20 hospitals in the Philadelphia area. Nineteen fully disclosed the prices for parking in the hospital garage (and potential discounts were shown), but only three of the 20 would disclose their prices for routine electrocardiograms ($137, $600, $1,200). [JAMAInternalMedicine.com, 12-2-2013]

In ubiquitous public relations announcements around Pittsburgh, the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center (UPMC) proudly points to its 52,000-person workforce delivering high-quality care. However, when the government sought to collect payroll taxes on UPMC, the company claimed it owed nothing because not a single employee actually works for UPMC. All 52,000 are, technically, on the books of UPMC's 40-plus subsidiaries, and a UPMC spokesman told the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette in October that he not only did not know which subsidiary the UPMC CEO worked for but which one he himself worked for. (He also said he did not know how many of the subsidiaries paid payroll taxes, but a UPMC attorney said its arrangement is "widely practiced throughout the business community"). [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, 10-22-2013, 11-11-2013]

Two 16-year-olds tried to pull off a street robbery at a housing complex in the Bernal Heights neighborhood of San Francisco in December, but one was arrested and the other is no longer with us. According to police, the victim cooperated fully with the two, but for some reason, one of the muggers fired his gun anyway. The bullet struck the victim (who was hospitalized, but will survive), ricocheted off his face and hit the shooter's partner, who died at the scene. [SFGate.com, 12-27-2013]

Thanks This Week to the News of the Weird Board of Editorial Advisors.

America's returning warriors continue to experience inexplicable difficulty after putting their lives at risk for their country. It took 13 years for Army Sgt. Maj. Richard Erickson to get his job back from his civilian employer after he took leave in 2000 to serve in the National Guard special forces. The employer soon fired him for taking "excessive military leave." The employer? The U.S. Postal Service, for which Erickson worked as a window clerk (and which was forced to reinstate him after a January 2014 ruling awarding him $2 million in back pay). Erickson had won several interim victories, but USPS fought each one, extending the case, and said in January that it might even appeal the latest ruling. [Los Angeles Times, 1-8-2014]

-- Happy New Year: (1) Once again, celebrants in France marked Jan. 1 by setting fire to 1,067 cars nationwide (down from 1,193 the previous Jan. 1). (2) In the Hillbrow neighborhood of Johannesburg, South Africa, celebrants apparently decided to abandon a 20-year-old tradition and not hurl furniture from high-rise apartments. (The Hillbrow custom was highlighted on one social-networking website, along with the New Year's graveyard gathering of relatives in Chile and Ireland's banging bread on walls to dispel evil spirits.) [Daily Telegraph (London), 1-1-2014] [Wall Street Journal, 1-2-2014]

-- Holy Mutations: Deformed animals born in developing countries often attract streams of pilgrims, seeking to touch a creature considered divinely blessed. In December, a five-legged cow in Raipur, India, had supposedly "caused" the last 30 women who touched it to give birth to boys. And a day after that report came one from Phuket, Thailand, in which a newborn gecko with six legs and two heads has become a magnet for visitors seeking clues to winning lottery numbers. [Daily Mail (London), 12-25-2013] [Phuket News, 12-26-2013]

-- In November the Journal-News of Hamilton, Ohio, examining various police union contracts in the state, learned that in several jurisdictions, officers are allowed to work their shifts even when less sober than some drivers whom they ticket for DUI. In Lebanon, Ohio, for instance, cops can work with a .04 blood-alcohol reading. In Butler County, a .04 reading triggers legal protections for officers that are unavailable to ordinary drivers. (However, in Lebanon, an officer's right to suck on a breath mint before taking the test was recently removed from the contract.) [Journal-News, 11-17-2013]

-- Judges as Romantics: (1) In December, Italy's top appeals court awarded a new trial to a man, 60, who had been convicted of having sex with an 11-year-old girl. Evidence had been excluded that the pair were having an "amorous relationship" with "feelings of love." (2) Alabama Judge James Woodroof of Limestone County, given two separate chances in December to sentence Austin Clem, 25, to jail time for raping a girl beginning when she was 13, both times opted for probation. (The no-jail sentences perhaps reflected that Clem's family and hers continued to socialize after the rapes.) [Agence France-Presse via Business Insider, 12-31-2013] [Associated Press via New York Times, 12-24-2013]

-- The Continuing British Campaign to Abolish Risks: (1) Britain's Royal Mail announced in December that it would stop delivery to Jeff and Sheila White's cottage in Carnforth because the carrier was frightened of cows. (Mrs. White said he was just lazy, in that when the cows were present, the carrier had to open and close a gate to get to their cottage.) (2) A 65-year-old school crossing guard resigned in October from a job he said he liked because officials at Manadon Vale Primary School had ordered him to stop playfully "high-fiving" students. Guards, the school said, need both arms free to hold signs and make proper signals. [Daily Mail, 12-5-2013] [Plymouth Herald, 10-14-2013]

-- News of the Weird has reported the emerging mainstream treatment (for various bowel disorders) of fecal transplants, in which a healthier relative "donates" via enema supposedly healthier microbes to a sickly patient to normalize intestinal activity. The process, still strange to many patients despite its apparent success, has become so popular that in October Canadian officials felt the need to warn patients not to perform amateur transplants. Said one mother, after successfully having her 10-year-old daughter treated, "I think one day ... we will have fecal-matter banks like (blood banks and sperm banks)." [CTV, 10-4-2013]

-- Unclear on the Concept: In December, after Carmen Reategui, 34, was arrested for DUI in Readington Township, N.J., and was too impaired to drive home, she called Nina Petracca, 23, who arrived at the police station impaired herself (and was arrested for DUI), and both women called Ryan Hogan, 33, to take them home, but he also arrived impaired and was arrested. [Hunterdon County Democrat, 12-20-2013]

-- Classics: (1) Jamal Garrett, 29, was arrested in Antioch, Calif., in January after, police said, he tried to rob a Wells Fargo bank, but had fled empty-handed after a teller struggled to read a poorly written holdup note. (She and her manager said they did not even know immediately if it was a holdup or just a note requesting assistance.) (2) Daniel Severn, 27, pleaded guilty to burglary in England's Hull Crown Court in December, for trying to enter a home through the roof but getting trapped, upside down, in the bathroom. He dug his phone out of his pocket, but it fell into the toilet, and he remained hanging for an hour and a half until a resident arrived and found him. [San Jose Mercury News, 1-6-2014] [Daily Telegraph (London), 12-12-2013]

-- Unrelenting, swastika-tattooed New Jersey neo-Nazi Heath Campbell, 40, saw child No. 9 born in November, and once again, the county family welfare office removed it almost immediately. "I'm not allowed to have children because I'm a Nazi," he lamented. Campbell first made headlines in 2008 when a bakery declined to decorate a birthday cake for his son, Adolf Hitler Campbell, leading child welfare officials to investigate, and more seizures followed, now including the November-born Eva (Lynn Patricia) Braun. Campbell told reporters he would continue to fight for offspring. "I'll stop making them when they stop taking them." [New York Daily News, 12-30-2013]

-- News of the Weird informed readers in November that the Snuggle House was about to open in Madison, Wis., promising clients pajama-clad bedmates -- as long as no sex (or foreplay, even) took place. In fact, Snuggle House has yet to open (in part because the Madison assistant city attorney has yet to overcome her belief that cuddling without sex is impossible). However, a December Associated Press report noted that no-sex cuddleries thrive in Rochester, N.Y. (The Snuggery), Boulder, Colo. (Be the Love You Are), and San Francisco (Cuddle Therapy). Snuggle House owner Matthew Hurtado said he is still working with Madison officials on regulations to prevent naughtiness. [Associated Press via Washington Post, 12-8-2013]

-- Among planet Earth's most bizarre local customs is the Christmas tradition in Spain's Catalonia region of decorating Nativity scenes with figurines of famous people squatting and answering nature's calls. News of the Weird has noted that presidents (Bush and Obama) have been "honored" with posterior-baring statuettes, along with Queen Elizabeth. Right on cue this past Christmas, Spanish artists unveiled "caganers" in the images of Pope Francis and Nelson Mandela. (Perhaps the least-illogical explanation for the tradition is that if the manger is fertilized, the coming year's crops will flourish.) [Agence France-Presse via The Local (Rome), 11-16-2013]

-- To build an iron ore smelting plant in Iceland in 2009, Alcoa Inc. was forced to kowtow to the country's national obsession that elves ("hidden people") live underground and that construction projects must assure that the little fellas have had a chance to scatter gracefully to new habitats. Alcoa hired the necessary elf-monitoring "engineers," and eventually the project proceeded. In December 2013, the government announced it was temporarily abandoning a major road project connecting a remote peninsula and the capital of Reykjavik after it was "learned" that the route would disturb an "elf church." The likely outcome, again, according to an Associated Press dispatch, is that the project will resume once the elves have relocated. [Associated Press via San Jose Mercury News, 12-23-2013]

Everyone's Above Average: Ask Americans how they stand compared to their fellow countrymen, and in survey after survey, the vast majority rank themselves "above average" in such areas as driving skill, sexual prowess, and general honesty. A recent study of English prisoners, published in the British Journal of Social Psychology, revealed that those miscreants think they, too, are in the upper half. They rate themselves above average (whether compared to Britons in prison or in society at large) in compassion, generosity, dependability, trustworthiness and honesty. In fact, the only trait on the University of Southampton survey on which the criminals failed to rank themselves as better than the typical Brit was "law-abidingness." On that trait, the inmates rated themselves merely as "average." [Pacific Standard magazine, 1-7-2014]

-- Pastor Ray Scott Teets, 66, of Fallen Timbers Community Chapel in Springhill Township, Pa., arrested in November for alleged "inappropriate contact" with an 11-year-old girl (daughter of parishioners) on at least three occasions, denied to police that the meetings were inappropriate. The girl, he said, requested counseling with him and suggested that the sessions take place in the storage shed in back of the chapel. (The girl said there were six meetings, lasting about 15 minutes each, and denied initiating them.) [WTAE-TV (Pittsburgh), 11-22-2013]

-- Robert Bourque, 55, was convicted of DUI in Sarnia, Ontario, in October, but continued to deny the charge. He admitted he had four beers on the day of the traffic stop but said the Breathalyzer result was misleading because he had recently poured alcohol into his ears to test his theory about how Jesus healed the sick. (Bourque was acting as his own lawyer.) Toronto Sun, 10-11-2013]

-- The mother and other relatives of William Medina, 24, said they felt hurt by the public's comments suggesting that Medina and his partner in the November Reading, Pa., armed robbery were "thugs." William was a "family man" -- "no big hard criminal," his mother said. The two robbers, armed and wearing masks, were gunned down by a Krick's Korner customer who said he feared the worst when he saw the robbers leading a store employee at gunpoint into a back room. A Medina cousin said he deplored people's taking the law into their own hands. [WFMZ-TV (Allentown, Pa.), 11-5-2013]

-- Celebrity Ironies: (1) In December, a California appeals court endorsed actor Tippi Hedren's victory suing the lawyer who had earlier failed to win compensation for her from a 2006 studio accident. In Hedren's most famous movie role, she was attacked by birds in Alfred Hitchcock's iconic film, and in 2006 had been clobbered by falling scenery caused by birds nesting in an attic over a stage. (2) A man who won a Hollywood raffle to watch the finale of "Breaking Bad" with cast members was arrested in Fort Myers, Fla., in January and faces his own intent-to-sell drug charges. Two weeks earlier, unrelated to the show or the raffle, a man with the same name as the show's protagonist (Walter White) was sentenced in Billings, Mont., to 12 years in prison on drug charges. [Hollywood Reporter, 12-16-2013] [Naples Daily News, 1-1-2014] [Billings Gazette, 12-16-2013]

-- Too Much Information: Arvind Kejriwal, fresh from his electoral victory as chief minister of the state of New Delhi, India, was to report to work on Monday, Dec. 30th, to begin fulfilling his anti-corruption administration -- one that promised unprecedented "transparency" to make government visible to constituents. However, the transparency of his first public announcement was perhaps over-the-top -- that he was taking the day off because of a bout of diarrhea. Said a colleague, "When the chief minister gives you a minute-by-minute update on his bowel movements, hail democracy." [Agence France-Presse via South China Morning Post, 12-30-2013]

-- Officials in Taiji, Japan, announced in October they would build a tourist attraction to publicize a nearby annual dolphin cull in which thousands are killed. Park planners hope to attract visitors to swim and cavort in pools among the lovable, captured dolphins -- and also to dine on dolphin meat (and rare whale meat) scored from the culls. Conservationists are of course disgusted by the project. [Japan Daily Press, 10-7-2013]

-- Michael Robertson, 31, argued via a lawyer before Massachusetts's highest court in November that his arrest for taking "upskirt" photographs of a woman on the subway should be tossed out -- asserting that he has a constitutional right to take pictures of anything that is not covered up in public. Said his lawyer (a woman), noting that the victim's skirt provided only partial covering, "If a clothed person reveals a body part whether it was intentional or unintentional, he or she cannot expect privacy." (Robertson's case had been suspended at the trial court while he seeks a ruling on his legal interpretation.) [Eagle Tribune (North Andover, Mass.), 11-4-2013]

-- Legislation, Not the Constitution, Is the Supreme Law of the Land: The December federal court decision, by Judge William Pauley, dismissing a challenge to the National Security Agency's phone surveillance program, suggested that even if a citizen might prove that his constitutional right to privacy was being violated, that person could never know it in the first place and thus never challenge, because Congress purposely made the NSA program secret. In fact, wrote Judge Pauley, the alleged constitutional violation that created the current lawsuit only came to light because of the unauthorized leaks by Edward Snowden. Therefore, if Congress never amends its secret laws, citizens will never get to find out whether their rights are being violated. [Washington Post, 12-27-2013]

For nearly 30 years, until 2007, the U.S. national symbol, the bald eagle, was endangered and protected, but officially they (along with golden eagles) are now so insignificant that the government is willing to endure dozens of them being chopped to death annually in the blades of "clean energy" wind turbines. An Associated Press investigation in December revealed that the federal government is purposely ignoring the eagles' attrition out of fear that outraged conservationists' campaigns will hinder development of wind power as an alternative to coal-produced electricity. (Another recent AP investigation revealed a similar painful choice in the continued commitment to ethanol as a cleaner alternative fuel even though that cleanliness is being increasingly questioned, and even though ethanol production requires the massive diversion of corn that could inexpensively feed millions of hungry people worldwide.) [Associated Press via Philly.com, 12-6-2013]

Love the One You're With: (1) Lydell Coleman, 36, was charged with felony indecent exposure in Seattle in December. He had allegedly dropped his pants outside the Sub Shop at Westwood Village and begun "humping" the front window. (2) Edwin Tobergta, 34, was sentenced to 11 months in prison in November after his earlier guilty plea in Hamilton, Ohio, to "having sex," naked, with a rubber pool float, in front of children. (3) An inebriated Andrew Davidson, 25, was arrested in July on a train between Aberdeen, Scotland, and Glasgow after foisting himself on a beverage cart and "humping" it, shouting "I want to kiss you, I want to (have sex with) you." [KOMO-TV, 12-25-2013] [WXIX-TV (Cincinnati) via WMC-TV (Memphis), 11-5-2013] [Metro (London), 1-7-2014]

According to a police report, Tevin Monroe, 31, walked into a McDonald's in Norfolk, Va., in December to inquire about a job, asked a manager for an application, and was told that the form was available online and that he should go download it. The manager's response left Monroe dissatisfied, and he lifted his shirt to show the manager the gun in his waistband. The manager quickly located a paper application for Monroe (but also discreetly summoned police, who arrived and arrested Monroe while he was still filling out the form). [WVEC-TV (Norfolk), 12-17-2013]

University of Alabama football fan Adrian Briskey, 28, was charged in December with the fatal shooting of a 36-year-old woman (also a Bama fan) at a postgame gathering in Hoover, Ala., to commiserate over the team's last-second loss to arch-rival Auburn. According to the victim's sister, Briskey was angry at the woman because she was insufficiently distraught at the game's outcome. [WBRC-TV (Birmingham), 12-9-2013]