DEAR HARRIETTE: My son wants to become a police officer, and I am worried. I know that it is a so-called good, stable job with benefits. But I worry that he will end up being killed in the line of duty. Plus, these days the community doesn’t trust cops the way they did when I was growing up. I know I can’t make this decision for him, but I really wish he would go for something else. How can I get him to consider another path? -- Say No to Cop

DEAR SAY NO TO COP: You should not try to dash your son’s dreams. Yes, being a police officer comes with certain potential dangers, but he knows that already. We need strong, honest community members to go into law enforcement. Perhaps your son can help to bring back that spirit of community that you appreciated when you were growing up.

Rather than stomping on his dreams, you can express your concerns but give your son your blessing for him to find out if this is the right career for him.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a neighbor who complains about her daughter all the time. Her daughter is an adult who started her life off great. She is smart and was driven to make something of her life, but then she got caught up with a ne’er-do-well guy, and everything went downhill from there. They started smoking crack, and the next thing you know, this young woman with so much potential has taken a nosedive. She can’t keep a job. She has stolen from the family home and destroyed property in the house. The police have come to their apartment several times, causing disruption and fear in many of the neighbors -- especially those who have children.

Some days this young woman seems perfectly normal. You would never know she has a problem, but her mother assures me that she is still addicted to crack. As a neighbor, I’m not sure what to do. On occasion this young woman has asked me to buzz her into the building or to use my phone. I have known her for most of her life, but I don’t want to become a pawn in this. I also don’t want to let her into my house. How can I establish boundaries? -- Neighbor of an Addict

DEAR NEIGHBOR OF AN ADDICT: Start with the mom. Ask her how she recommends you interact with her daughter. Ask if she thinks you should let her in the building or engage her in any way. If she recommends no engagement, you may have to keep your head low when you see the young woman and not comply with her requests. If you have to go that route, you could also apologize and say you’re sorry, but you can’t help out anymore.

Given that the mother has told you that the daughter has vandalized her own home, you should not let her into your home. As awkward as it may seem, even if you let her use your phone, do so outside your door. Mostly, you need to stay out of this. Until this woman is successfully treated for drug addiction, her behavior will likely be unpredictable.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Last year, I had a series of medical tests that led to more and more tests. I was diagnosed with a couple of health issues that I need to deal with, but honestly, I can’t afford to go to all of the doctors' appointments, let alone pay for all of the medications. And I have insurance! I work, too, but I can’t keep up with all of the things needed to stay healthy. I feel like I am going to go broke trying to stay alive. I don’t know what to do. -- Can't Afford Health Care

DEAR CAN’T AFFORD HEALTH CARE: I’m so sorry to hear about your situation. Sadly, you are not alone. A lot of Americans are facing the same reality -- they cannot afford the care they need to stay healthy, at least not at face value.

While I do not have any magic tricks to offer to you, I can tell you that some teaching hospitals offer free or low-cost health care for patients who are willing to allow students to learn from them. This has been true for schools of dentistry, surgery, mental health and more. Look around your city to see what teaching hospitals are there, and inquire as to whether they will accept you.

Beyond that, negotiate a payment plan with all of your medical creditors. Be proactive, and let them know your situation. Ask for mercy. Usually, this will help you to create a bridge that allows you to meet your goals.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I started working for my local newspaper, and I am totally psyched about it. I live in a small town, and most of the people know each other. My job is to be like a gossip columnist in a way, reporting on the people and things that are going on. Anyway, my editor asked me to write a story about a family that got into trouble recently. One of the family members got arrested, so it is real news. I feel awful for this family, and I don’t want to make it harder for them. I have known these people for years. I also don’t want to lose my job. How can I handle this situation? -- Sensitive or Professional?

DEAR SENSITIVE OR PROFESSIONAL?: If you want to keep your job, you will have to write something about what has happened, but who says you can’t do so with compassion? Given that one family member got arrested, that news is public knowledge. Dig a little deeper. Can you discover any information that might shed light on why the alleged crime happened? Consider talking to friends of theirs to gain insight into who they are and how they are dealing with this crisis. Write an honest, fair and balanced article, but feel comfortable being thoughtful. If your whole town is in shock or mourning or there is another type of predominant emotion among neighbors, share that, too. You can create a complete story without being scathing.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My high schooler went to a party this weekend with friends from school. Afterwards, I learned that a number of the kids were vaping e-cigarettes. I have seen ads for e-cigarettes, and I know that they are highly addictive. When I talked to my daughter about it, she blew me off and said that none of her friends are addicted and “it’s no big deal.”

Trying to keep my cool, I kept talking to my daughter. I want her to feel that she can talk to me about anything. I asked if she had ever tried vaping. She admitted that she had. I wish I could punish her in some way to get her to never do it again, but I know that won’t work at this point. What can I do to protect her from possibly getting addicted to nicotine -- or anything else, for that matter? -- No Juul

DEAR NO JUUL: Part of the reason that the Food and Drug Administration, many parents and activists have protested against e-cigarettes is because they are addictive. In my research, I learned that one Juul e-cigarette has as much nicotine as an entire pack of cigarettes. What makes cigarettes addictive IS nicotine.

How can you relate the severity of e-cigarette use to your daughter? Tell her stories -- as many as you know. Make sure they're true stories. If you ever tried smoking cigarettes, tell her what happened. Talk to her about drug use and what the effects can be on her life. Go through the list of drugs and substances that teens use these days. Definitely talk to her about opioids, too, as they are highly addictive. Expose her to what’s happening today and how dangerous peer pressure is. Give her examples whenever you can of how detrimental e-cigarettes and other substances can be to her future. Showing her rather than reprimanding her is the best way to open her eyes.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been on my job for less than a year. Recently, I was asked to apply for a position that came open. It stretches my abilities, but I was up for it. I have been doing OK for the most part, and I have received a lot of encouragement. There’s one woman, though, who is constantly belittling me. She seems to go out of her way to find negative things to say about my job performance. She is never encouraging, and it’s upsetting. Another one of the leaders in the company who is very supportive of me suggested that I speak to this woman and tell her to quit bullying me. I’m nervous to say anything. I would rather just not stay in this job than to have her always going out of her way to poke at me. What should I do? -- Anti-Bullying

DEAR ANTI-BULLYING: The tricky thing about walking away from certain conflicts without addressing them is that they often follow you. The business leader who told you to stand up for yourself was right. The next time your bully addresses you inappropriately, ask her directly what the problem is. Ask her why she is talking to you in that way. Tell her you want to figure out how to work with her effectively, but when she constantly berates you, it makes it difficult for you to work well.

You can also say the words directly: "Stop bullying me." You have to say it like you mean it. If she persists, go to HR. Do your best to speak up for yourself and sort it out directly first, though.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)