DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started a business and work out of my home. I need to have client meetings to get things going, but I don’t have a place to go. I have been inviting people to meet me for coffee or drinks at various locations, but that is getting expensive. I don’t have much disposable income right now. If I invite someone to meet with me, I feel like I have to offer them something. I don’t know what to do. I get that you have to pay to play, but I can’t keep paying at these prices. -- On the Path, Philadelphia

DEAR ON THE PATH: Do a little research on your spending patterns. How much do you typically spend per month to entertain clients? Count every cup of coffee, doughnut, lunch, drink or dinner. Be specific so you can assess what you have allowed yourself to afford thus far.

Next, consider some of the popular temporary workspaces popping up in your area. Often you can rent a desk with access to a conference room for a relatively low monthly fee. Then, voila, you have an office and can invite people to meet you there. You can also look for free public spaces to meet, including the library -- if there is a room where you are allowed to meet. Look for enclosed public spaces that are opulent and that attract a professional population. This could include open space that’s attached to a business. You have to get creative to identify an opulent space you can afford, which is why the rented desk and conference room could be the answer. Don’t give up!

DEAR HARRIETTE: When do you stop trying to keep a friendship going? I ask because I made friends with a woman a few years ago, and we spent a lot of time together initially. I met her through a mutual friend who remains friends with both of us. But whenever I contact this woman to get together, she’s busy. I have been sending her notes every few months for about two years. Sometimes she writes back to say hello, but nothing has happened. I know how busy our lives can get, which is why I don’t necessarily think she’s brushing me off. But still, it has been two years. Do I give up now? -- Distant Friend, Jackson, Mississippi

DEAR DISTANT FRIEND: How important is this woman to you? You must decide. If you believe she adds value to your life, you can continue to check in on occasion. What she is making clear to you is that you are not a priority for her right now. I recommend that you cultivate the relationships that feel ripe for the harvest. One day, this friendship may feel more favorable. Until then, you will likely be left unfulfilled because she is not choosing to make time for you. Never forget your own value; you are worthy of respect and thoughtfulness. If you aren’t getting that from someone you like, step away until you believe you will be welcomed.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter starts off shy and then warms up after a while. Because she is slow to interact with people, some think she is shy or unfriendly. That’s not the case at all. It’s more like she starts off as an observer, figures out who she wants to talk to and then slowly opens up to that person. In our fast-paced world, this can cause problems. I’m worried that now, when she’s interviewing for high school, that the first impression people may have of her is that she is not interested in their school. What can I do to help her to pick up her pace? -- Press Fast Forward, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR PRESS FAST FORWARD: Please know that your daughter is not the only student who can be a little shy at first. Many children need a little coaxing. What you can do to help your daughter prepare for what is a rigorous interview process in New York City is to get her a coach. She needs to practice speaking out loud and talking about herself with confidence and enthusiasm. Generally, that’s not a role best filled by you. It can be a friend who is good at coaching or, better yet, a hired professional to support her through the interviewing process. You can encourage her to think about what she likes about the school she is visiting as well as her interests. Practicing talking about herself is key to losing the butterflies.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I had an intern many years ago whom I really liked. He tried to keep in touch with me, which I appreciated, but it was at a time when I was busy building my business, so I was distracted. When I finally realized how dismissive I had been of him and tried to find him, I had no good contact information. Years have passed, and this young man’s teacher, who is my friend, found a letter from him. We have his parents’ contact information. I’m a little nervous. I want to reach out to reconnect with this young man, but I was not responsible years ago. Do you think it’s wise to knock on that door again? -- Closing the Loop, Seattle

DEAR CLOSING THE LOOP: Your sincerity should ring through when you make this next effort. Starting with his parents, write a note, or call if you have a phone number, and say you want to reach out to their son. Remind them of when he worked with you so they will feel comfortable making the connection.

If you do reach the young man himself, start off by saying how happy you are to reconnect. Ask how and what he is doing. Allow him to share his story. Then admit you didn’t feel good about the way you parted ways years ago and that you have tried to find him for some time. Ask for his forgiveness for your lack of responsiveness in the past and see if you can forge a relationship now. There is a chance he could be in a busy phase, but your overture should count for something.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My twin sons are in eighth grade. Their middle school ends at eighth, so we are shopping for schools now. It’s driving me nuts. I went to public school in my hometown, and it was great. They are in private school, and we are looking at private, aka independent, high schools now, but it’s expensive. I don’t know how we are going to be able to afford to pay for high school and then college. My husband and I earn a modest living. We are applying for financial aid, but I worry about getting enough money from a scholarship. What do you recommend? -- Next High School, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR NEXT HIGH SCHOOL: The high school process can be harrowing, especially in New York. What you should do is fill out the paperwork for financial aid eligibility as soon as possible. When you speak to schools, tell them you will definitely need aid and ask what the ranges are for what they give to families. Typically, schools with large endowments have more flexibility when it comes to supporting students’ education. Those are the schools you should target when you know you need financial support.

However, don’t overlook public high schools. New York City is famous for excellent public high schools that are as competitive as many of the independent schools. While hard to get into, they provide an excellent education at no cost. Consider the gamut of what high school education has to offer. Do not go into debt trying to pay for a school you cannot afford.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a woman of a certain age, and I am discovering that I get hot flashes in the blink of an eye. I could be walking down the street or sitting in a meeting or talking to my kids. Then suddenly it’s like it’s raining on my face. Sweating is so embarrassing. I don’t know what to do. Should I wipe my face? Excuse myself from the conversation? I want to keep my composure, but it’s impossible sometimes. -- Stop the Rain, Cleveland

DEAR STOP THE RAIN: Menopause can be a difficult stage in life to manage. If you can accept it as a natural part of life, you will be able to live through it better. Practically speaking, wear lightweight clothing, preferably in natural fibers and in layers. Being able to peel off layers when you are hot can be a lifesaver. Avoid wearing clothing that is tight or that binds you. Keep a fan with you at all times. You can whip it out and fan yourself pretty much anywhere you are.

Do your best to stay calm. When you experience any type of extreme emotion, you will likely have a hot flash. Staying even-tempered helps to keep your body cooler. Finally, go to see your gynecologist and talk about natural hormone replacement options that may help you to go through this stage more easily.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)