DEAR HARRIETTE: Due to my age and health, I move about in a motorized wheelchair. My hips are no good anymore, and it's just easier for me this way. Part of the village I live in has a steep incline. This hill used to be manageable for me until a new business renovated the incline into stairs. This Mexican restaurant just remodeled the sidewalk into 6-foot-wide steps and left a slim sliver of sidewalk that isn't a stair. Going onto the road is incredibly unsafe, but I fear I am too close to the curb and steps on either side of me to try to tackle this hill.

I have considered writing a letter to this business, mentioning how it's upset the disabled community in the village, but I'm afraid we aren't its demographic anyway. -- Not Disability Friendly, Suburban Maryland

DEAR NOT DISABILITY FRIENDLY: You absolutely should write to the restaurant and file a Americans With Disabilities complaint with the United States Department of Justice (ada.gov/complaint). Federal law protects you and all disabled people: It is the law that you should have the ability to maneuver on sidewalks. Public establishments should also offer wheelchair access to restrooms. While it is not always easy to enforce this law, you can certainly try. You may need to engage the media to draw attention to your plight, but do not give up. Your safety may depend on your activism.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I work with overweight and obese children to help them develop healthy habits in regards to diet and exercise. The center has dance parties (Zumba for children), small cooking classes and a wealth of information and dietitians. We have helped many children, but I am noticing a sad trend. Once children go to about three to four weeks' worth of classes and workshops, their parents will see immediate improvement and withdraw them. At this point, children gain back the weight and turn into yo-yo dieters. I think that parents are in denial, and once their children experiences a little improvement, they decide it is good enough.

I could never force parents to keep their children enrolled, but we create fun programs and are really trying to make the next generation healthier. An intern mentioned using contracts to keep children enrolled and see long-term weight loss, but I think this goes against our message of wanting willing participants at the center. How can we persuade parents to keep children enrolled after the initial improvement? -- Fluctuating Weight and Attendance, Syracuse, New York

DEAR FLUCTUATING WEIGHT AND ATTENDANCE: Instead of contracts, why not consider incentives? Offer gifts to the children if they reach particular milestones of weight loss and fitness activity. You and your company can come up with affordable incentives that are exciting enough to lure children back after their initial success. With the parents' permission, you can post success stories on a private website that shows parents what sticking with the program will do for their children. It is possible to help some of these children long-term. Don't give up on them.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife's parents have never really liked me. They think I'm too loud, too competitive and too commanding in terms of deciding plans. Honestly, these traits aren't things I dislike about myself in the slightest. I like being the leader of excursions and deciding how events will go.

Anyway, as my mother-in-law's birthday is coming up, I was thinking of a way to win over my in-laws. They live in a senior community in Florida, and golf carts are an acceptable mode of transportation. So I thought of surprising my in-laws with a new golf cart so I'll be more favorable to them. My wife told me not to even try because I won't be able to buy their love, but this gift is so grand, I'm expecting a fairly positive reaction.

Is this the best route to go down with my in-laws? I doubt anyone can turn down a new golf cart! -- New Wheels From New Son, Dallas

DEAR NEW WHEELS FROM NEW SON: Your wife is right. You cannot buy anybody's love. You can impress them, and they may accept the gift, but it is doubtful that you will end up with the gift you really want -- acceptance. Indeed, the golf cart could come off as a loud and competitive way to win them over.

Rather than a physical gift, why not try listening a little better and figuring out what interests them? Try to talk less and listen more so that you get a sense of what makes them happy. Give them space to exert their own personalities, and over time you may be able to strike a comfortable relationship with them where no one dominates. As far as the golf cart goes, feel them out when you are together to see if they might like the idea. If so, then you can give it to them -- from you and your wife!

DEAR HARRIETTE: My preteen son plays on a travel soccer team. He's been playing soccer for eight years and has been around many different coaches in his life. I have liked most of these coaches; however, the most recent one really irks me. Whenever the boys get injured and aren't as aggressive as he'd like them to be, the coach yells at them to "act like men" or to "stop being pansies."

As a father, I've been trying to set a different example of masculinity for my son, and my son's coach seems to be reversing everything I've told my son about being able to express himself and his emotions. I don't want to seem like a pill, yet I feel like I should speak to the coach.

The boys on the team are about to become teenagers, and I don't think it's healthy for them to be constantly told to be aggressive and bottle up their emotions. How can I start the conversation with his coach? Should I ask other parents to join me, or should I confront him privately? -- Archaic Masculinity, Denver

DEAR ARCHAIC MASCULINITY: This is a time when there may be power in numbers. Speak to the other parents and ask them to go with you to speak to the coach. Chances are, however, that you won't get far. You can use this as a teaching opportunity where you talk to your son about the different ways that men express their masculinity. You may also want to take him off the team.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my co-workers is a horrible prankster. He describes himself as a jokester, and he's honestly becoming a nuisance to the office. Possibly the worst part of his pranks is that they're too small to be considered real pranks. For example, I'll try to use my stapler, only to discover that the staples have been taken out. Then, I'll hear him snickering. Once, he dropped four packets of sugar into someone's morning coffee. The "pranks" aren't funny; they just cause inconvenience around the workplace.

I'm afraid if I insult his "skills," he'll decide to take his pranking even further. Our boss laughs it off and says that this keeps the workplace lively, but I don't see anything funny about having to discover that he's taken all of the toilet paper from the bathroom and hidden it in a closet. How do I stop this? These mini-pranks are driving me nuts. -- Not Clowning Around, Seattle

DEAR NOT CLOWNING AROUND: Since your boss is complicit in your co-worker's shenanigans, you won't get the support you want from him. The next best step is to ignore this man. When he does something that is annoying, don't let him know that it bothers you. Do your best to act as if you don't even notice this guy. Without an audience, a performer often loses his drive. You can even suggest the same to your fellow co-workers. If all of you refuse to make comments or otherwise allow him to incite you, he may calm down and stop using you as his targets.

If he gets worse, go to human resources and file a complaint. It may seem petty today, but his games may become counterproductive tomorrow.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A close friend of mine moved in with me two months ago after losing her apartment due to the nonpayment of her roommate. It was great at first, because while I enjoy living alone, it can get kind of lonely every so often. However, I am now annoyed. Even though I have set boundaries around living in my house, my friend has repeatedly violated them, leaving dishes in the sink for days, not cleaning when it's her turn and bringing guys back to the house when I'm not home.

Whenever I ask her about her apartment hunt, she says she's been looking but it's just taking longer than expected. I don't want to kick her out, but I am starting to go crazy. How can I handle this without losing our friendship? -- Not Big Enough for the Both of Us, Detroit

DEAR NOT BIG ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US: Do not hesitate to invite your friend to leave. If you wait much longer, it might be difficult for you to get her out. You have every right to show her the door now. She has consistently broken your house rules, so she has to go. Give her a short window for a deadline, and make it clear that you will not be extending her stay. If the day comes and she has not packed up to go, you can change the locks and forward her belongings when she gives you a forwarding address. Harsh? Yes. Fair? Yes!

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)