DEAR MISS MANNERS: How do you go about declining when someone who just isn’t your type asks you out or asks for your phone number?

I have been nice and said things like, “I’m not dating right now,” or even, “I really only want to date someone of my faith.”

Some men just don’t seem to get the hint. How do you politely say, "It’s you, personally, I am not interested in"?

GENTLE READER: Oddly enough, people do not like being told that they are unattractive, especially by those they find attractive -- no matter how delicately this is worded.

And those excuses will just get you into trouble. If you use the line about your faith, suppose someone replied, "But I was hoping you would convert me."

The lack of an excuse will actually make your refusal clearer: just “Thank you for asking, but no, I think not.” This can simply be repeated in case of any ill-advised follow-ups.

As for the request for your telephone number, Miss Manners suggests putting a twist on the standard plea of busyness: “Why don’t you just give me yours? But frankly, I’m not sure I’ll be able to call because I’ve been very busy.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter is planning a wedding in 14 months. We are currently looking at venues in the city where she lives, which is a six-hour drive from our hometown.

We know that many people she would want to invite will not be able to attend. We also know that the invitation list will be limited by the occupancy limits of the venues we are looking at.

Is there a polite way to use a save-the-date card to say, “We’d love for you to come, but if you know you can’t, let us know so we can expand our invitation list”? Is this something that I should just talk to our friends and family about, as the mother of the bride?

For instance, we have relatives on our tentative guest list whom we love, but who have children playing sports in the fall; they would probably choose not to miss their kids’ games to spend a weekend at a cousin’s wedding. Other potential invitees might have limited time off work. We have several elderly aunts who I feel certain are not up to the trip, but they are at the top of our “must invite” list.

GENTLE READER: Alas, there is no polite way to say, “Please come -- but we’d be grateful to hear that you won’t.”

It is never safe to presume which guests would decline. It is not even safe to count on any answers received this far in advance, as plans often change.

In an ideal world, you would know who is coming within a week of sending actual invitations, which is when prospective guests should respond. Ha.

Rather, when that time comes, you will probably have to call around to non-responders to find out. And if they say they are not sure, Miss Manners would condone your replying, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I know Brenda will be disappointed. But of course we understand.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended a music festival, where I wore pasties instead of a top. While there, I actually ran into a group of co-workers, who all had a good laugh at seeing me in such a state of undress.

When I return to work, should I address the incident in any way, or should I pretend it never happened? Do I just laugh it off? I am pretty sure people will spread this story around the office, and it was obviously a bit embarrassing.

GENTLE READER: Let them have their laughs. Presumably you followed the festival directive: Scantily clad for maximum airflow.

Unless there are even more embarrassing photographs on social media, you need not submit your off-work life to their judgment. And if there are, Miss Manners suggests you delete them immediately.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am in the process of searching for a home for myself, my spouse and our young child. It will be a slight upgrade from the house we currently own, but we cannot afford anything large.

Many of the houses we view have three modest upstairs bedrooms, a kitchen and one large living/dining room downstairs. Thinking only of our own needs, we would be happy to turn the spare bedroom into a study and let the living/dining room be a playroom for our child. She can get a lot more use out of the floor space than we can as adults, especially during colder months.

I envision setting up an art table and art supply cabinet, various areas for pretend play, and a central dance area in this space. Any seating in this room would be appreciated only by those who enjoy being in the midst of kid activity.

If we were to set up our home this way, would it be rude for us to entertain guests (whether they come for a meal or merely to chat over tea) in our kitchen? Notice that I also do not have a dedicated spare bedroom in the above plan.

What rooms am I required by etiquette to have, even when square footage is limited?

GENTLE READER: This may come as a shock, but etiquette does not care how your house is laid out (or whether or not you have a guest room), only that you do your best to accommodate guests with seating and refreshments when they are there.

Therefore, Miss Manners condones entertaining in the kitchen and holding dance parties in the living room -- as well as the occasional chair made out of Legos for anyone who is up for it.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ve always wondered about this situation, which happens to me from time to time: Person A has finished their business in the restroom and opens the door, only to find Person B arriving to use the facilities.

Who has the “right of way” in this case -- the incoming person or the outgoing? Is there a proper etiquette?

Common sense tells me the incoming person probably has more of an urgent need, but maybe it’s not proper to let them in before the outgoing person exits.

GENTLE READER: The person leaving the facilities is usually allowed to exit first. But if the other person’s bathroom needs are that visibly urgent, Miss Manners suggests you get out of their way.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a female student, and I have a situation where a male classmate inappropriately chimes in on personal conversations. For example, I was asking my friends about a type of bra, and later that day, this classmate followed me to my car and gave me a tutorial about bras.

The crazy thing is he didn’t seem to notice that I was very uncomfortable. So I didn’t say or do anything about that situation, and now today, he chimed in again. I was talking with my teacher about severe cramps and vaginal pain, and he jumped in the conversation to explain why it’s happening.

I need to know how to tell this person he’s being inappropriate and needs to stop. He does these things to other people, as well, and none of us know how to handle it.

GENTLE READER: The fact that he is following you to your car is more concerning to Miss Manners than his choice of subject. She recommends you focus on that needing to stop and avoid the trap of telling him that women do not wish to hear a man’s opinion on women things. Of course it is irksome, but would it not be worse to have him explain to you how you would feel if the situation were reversed?

Better to have your personal conversations out of his earshot -- but not before pointing out that a man ought to know better than to follow a woman to her car.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A director at my place of work sent out a system-wide email inviting everyone to a baby shower for her daughter, who does not work here, never has, and no one here knows her, except by name.

The shower is scheduled for two hours, during work, in one of the rooms at my place of employment. Many of us are baffled by, first of all, the use of the company-wide email system (that very few people have access to) for such a strange invitation, and second, the fact that she somehow thinks this is appropriate.

On occasion, we have had departments host brief showers for people who do work here, but have never done so for grandparents, aunts, etc. Making people further uncomfortable is that, because of her position, she has influence over many of us.

Are we overreacting? Should we attend this event to protect our jobs, or should we politely decline due to our workload and hope she realizes how tacky this all is? To the best of my knowledge, management hasn’t said anything to her, because she acts as if everything is perfectly fine.

GENTLE READER: This is a wild overreach on the director’s part and an abuse of both the facilities and the people who report to her.

But before you go tattling on her to management (which is indeed tempting and warranted), Miss Manners suggests you bring it up to her delicately -- asking if there might be a better place to hold the event that does not utilize company resources or involve people her daughter doesn’t know. If your colleague balks, then you may consider going to HR or management. They probably already have a rule in place that guards against such practices.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)