DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I live in a studio flat, so, as you can imagine, our bed is out in the open. It’s next to the kitchen and at a good angle for people to watch TV. We also have enough chairs for people to sit on and a very comfortable couch, all of these at good angles for people to make conversation and watch TV.
My parents always taught me to never enter someone’s bedroom without permission and never to sit/lie on someone else’s bed, especially couple’s beds (though it was normal for me sit on my friends’ beds during my childhood/teenage years, and the other way around).
But now that I am a married woman, for me, our bed is almost a sacred place. And just because it is in the same room as everything else, that doesn’t justify people using it when there are other comfortable places to sit down.
Is it just me? And how can I address this with my husband’s and my own friends?
GENTLE READER: Without making a laughingstock out of yourselves?
Your marriage is sacred, your privacy is sacred, but your bed is a piece of furniture right there in the room in which you also entertain guests.
Miss Manners supposes you can park serving trays on the bed, if using it as a table doesn’t violate its sacredness. Or you can keep saying, “I think you’ll be more comfortable over there.” But she begs you not to address your friends with your reasoning. You will never hear the end of it.