DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter is very hurt that no one has sent her recent graduate anything yet. It has been one week, and she did not send out announcements.

Is it proper to put on Facebook how disappointed she is and that her son deserves better? What is the proper timeline for such things?

GENTLE READER: It depends on what the objective would be in doing this.

If you are predicting a resulting outpouring of love and material offerings from those to whom this scolding is directed, Miss Manners rather doubts that it will be successful. However, if the idea is to make your daughter appear greedy and her son to appear pathetic, the chances are good.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When talking with my husband of 30 years, he feels he needs to correct every word mispronounced. I find it irritating and lose my thought process when telling a story or my train of thought. He does it more as he has gotten older. What do you think?

GENTLE READER: That 30 years is a long time to refrain from attacking someone who drives you crazy. Unless, of course, you keep mispronouncing the same words, in which case Miss Manners imagines that it is he who is about to go over the brink.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m in a serious, one-year relationship with a wonderful man. He has a passion for running, which keeps him quite fit. I am a personal chef with a passion for food and entertaining, which often leaves me too tired to think of exercise. I could stand to lose a few pounds if either one of us were bothered by it.

I was able to meet his parents, who are equally passionate about a fit lifestyle, and was invited to dinner in their home. During the meal, I asked to be passed the dish of pasta that was served. His father obliged and then his mother said, “I’m sure Johnny will get you hooked on running so that you can start burning that stuff right off.”

I went from confused to shocked, and then offended. And I responded “You’re right, I’ll refrain. I was just being polite as it is obvious you wouldn’t normally have guests in your home.” My boyfriend quickly changed the subject and we went on with the evening.

My boyfriend later told me that I was incredibly rude. I told him that I simply replied to his mother’s statement in kind. I know Miss Manners is often put to the task of deciding who is correct so, in this instance, I would like to ask what she would have done in my shoes. By the way, his parents live on the opposite side of the country, and I do hate running.

GENTLE READER: The gentleman was right: You were incredibly rude. Mind you, his parents were rude, too, but that is no excuse for your being so.

Besides, Miss Manners can’t help noticing that they inadvertently hit on a weakness of yours: You really don’t know when to stop. You could have made your point while staying within the bounds of politeness by stopping after saying, “You’re right, I’ll refrain.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a sibling who oftentimes puts me on her speakerphone when we talk. It is frustrating to me, and I feel like she’s really saying, “I’m busy and don’t have time to talk.” I think it’s rude.

She probably uses her speaker function in her business as a real estate agent, but I would find the habit equally as abrasive if I were a client. I think speakerphones are fine for conference calls, but person to person, it sends a negative message.

How would you handle this, or just let it go? Maybe I am wrong. If so, that answer would suffice.

GENTLE READER: Using a speakerphone during a private conversation is not actually rude, unless that conversation is not actually private. Miss Manners is inclined to be lenient on the mechanics of the situation as long as there is an understanding that any previously unspecified listeners are always announced.

If you find it otherwise intolerable, then you may say, “I am afraid this connection is bad. Sometimes speakerphones can muddy the sound reception -- and I don’t want to miss anything. Do you mind taking me off and seeing if it is any better?” And then tell them that it is.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am about to have my second child, and I am formula-feeding this baby, as I did my first. Any recommendations for a more polite response than “None of your darn business” when asked why I chose to formula-feed? I prefer not to go into my mental health and prescribed medications with anyone but my husband.

GENTLE READER: “Thank you for your concern, but this was a decision made between our doctor and our family.” While you clearly should not have to justify your parenting choices, it is Miss Manners’ hope that citing a professional authority -- one not of the internet variety -- will quiet these nosy inquiries.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I told a good friend, who was 63 at the time, was still working, and had two kids under the age of 18, that he could collect Social Security checks for them until they turned 18, as I did.

At first, he did not believe me; then when he inquired and it was all true, he quit his job that he HATED and has collected over $60,000 in the past three years.

I never received even a thank-you. I dropped a few “you owe me’s,” but they fell on deaf ears. If that was me, I would have sent him at least dinner for two somewhere. I never ignore someone who does me a favor. Any other way to handle this besides letting it go?

GENTLE READER: For three years you have been waiting for this thank-you? If you were involved (as Miss Manners’ own dear father was) in actually setting up the Social Security system, then the whole country owes you a debt of gratitude.

But if this is not, in fact, the case, while a thank-you for the tip might have been nice, your burgeoning grudge most definitely is not. If Miss Manners informed you of a sale at a retail store, would she then deserve a cut of the money you saved? Unfortunately for you, your only choice is to let it go -- or to enter a field where a commission is warranted.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was taught to hold open doors for ladies, as well as allow ladies to enter and exit elevators before myself. But are there any guidelines for occasions when only gentlemen are present?

I have to admit to feeling a bit silly having a gentleman approach a door ahead of me, then open it and allow me to pass ahead of him. Also, I have been in situations where several gentlemen will all motion for the others to precede them into or out of an elevator, resulting in everyone looking at each other and waiting for someone to enter or leave first.

GENTLE READER: It is always polite to let someone else go first, but as Miss Manners realizes that after a certain point, comedy and irritation are unavoidable, she does have a few practical suggestions.

Do not repeat an offer to let someone else go first. Call this the Abbott and Costello Rule. This means that the last person to say “You first” is the last out.

Do not make the offer if acting on it is impractical -- if, for example, you are standing at the front of the elevator at the midpoint of the door with 15 men behind you in the car. Call this the Marx Brothers “Night at the Opera” Rule.

If you really feel the need, you can always turn around after you exit and put your hand on the door to hold it for the next person. Miss Manners never objects to politeness, but if properly handled, exiting an elevator can be accomplished before the alarm sounds and the door closes on some unlucky rider (the Buster Keaton Scenario).

DEAR MISS MANNERS: While on vacation, it seemed every restaurant we ate at would wrap silverware while we were at dinner. The clatter of the silverware interrupted our conversation and atmosphere.

We said something to the silverware attendant at one place, and she said she would increase the volume of the television. What would Miss Manners have done?

GENTLE READER: If the attendant was being literal-minded in attempting to address your complaint, then Miss Manners would not order the “catch of the day” for fear of what the cook may think the term means. If the attendant was being sarcastic, Miss Manners would respond literally, clarifying politely that you were hoping to be relocated to a quieter table.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughters-in-law host small parties, and extend invitations to me through my daughter, saying to her: “Tell your dad he’s invited.” The in-laws have my phone number and are known to send texts.

Is it too much to expect a phone call or even a simple text directly from the hosts for such invitations? Do such indirect invitations reflect an insincere wish for my attendance, perhaps just for the sake of maintaining appearances?

GENTLE READER: Perhaps. Or perhaps they thought of you while inviting their sister-in-law and knew she would be speaking with you soon.

It is not too much to expect a direct invitation, but Miss Manners stops short of accusing anyone of rudeness. You cannot gauge the intentions of your daughters-in-law because they are not talking to you directly. And Miss Manners can neither testify to their sincerity nor convey your curiosity, as she does not know the ladies in question.

Someone has to bridge the gap, and your daughter is already conveniently located in the middle. Ask her to explain to her sisters-in-law that while you would love to attend their parties, you don’t feel right accepting a secondhand invitation.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)