DEAR MISS MANNERS: We have lived in the same small town for over a decade. My daughter is active in sports, church and family activities. A rather awkward but sweet girl, the same age as my daughter, moved into our neighborhood, and in the summer, the girls would occasionally play together.
During the school year, my daughter has a booked social calendar. She had a party, and this new neighbor did not make the list. She is now texting my daughter asking her why she wasn't invited. I've told my daughter that is a text she should not respond to, but I wondered if you had better advice?
GENTLE READER: You say "did not make the list" as if it were a college acceptance letter over which neither of you had control.
If, as her parent, you were unable to convince your daughter that it would have been kind to include this girl -- particularly since she is a neighbor and therefore likely to notice -- perhaps you could encourage her at least to be gracious about the girl's quite understandable hurt feelings now.
While Miss Manners concedes that it was not proper for the girl to demand an answer as to why she was overlooked, ignoring her entirely seems unnecessarily cruel. Your daughter could simply say (or text back, if absolutely necessary), "I am so sorry, but these were old friends who wanted to catch up, and I didn't think you would find the party interesting. Perhaps we can plan to get together at another date." And then in the name of, if nothing else, neighborly relations, encourage her to do so.