DEAR MISS MANNERS: During our adventure of driving up Pikes Peak in Colorado, my girlfriend and I stopped to admire the view, and she wandered up the road to take some pictures.

I joined her, and as we returned to our vehicle, there was a steep 1/4-mile drop on one side. The other side was the road, where there wasn't a great deal of traffic. I considered the drop-off to be the greater hazard, so I walked on that side.

Was that the correct, gallant decision?

GENTLE READER: Indeed. Just as a gallant gentleman precedes a lady down a staircase, so that if she trips she will have something soft on which to land, a gentleman should walk on the side of the cliff.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am engaged but have been married before. My finance has been married twice.

How do we let people know we would appreciate gift cards instead of gifts at our reception? We have three of everything.

GENTLE READER: If you have three of everything, why aren't you thinking of sharing with those who don't have any, instead of plotting to make others help you get even more?

And by the way, the word is "fiance," not "finance." Or maybe in this case, it is.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it OK to host an informal dinner while in bare feet? I walk around my home in bare feet all the time, but I wonder if it is proper when guests come over. I do not know if it is perceived as unsanitary, since I am finishing preparing a meal in my kitchen.

I have wondered if the boundaries of what is proper have changed about showing feet. We now have spas that do a booming business keeping our feet in beautiful condition, as well as body-care products for those who like to do it themselves at home.

It is possible to have beautiful feet and toenails, which are equally attractive. In our ever-changing society, how is current etiquette decided? It seems to this reader that the "no feet showing" rule belongs in the 19th century when all of a woman's body had to be covered in public.

But if it is still proper that one should never wear sandals except on the beach, it will save me much money in pedicures and fine sandals. However, on 100-degree days I may moan a bit.

GENTLE READER: Actually, you would have loved the 19th century, when the glimpse of a lady's trim ankle was considered erotically exciting. Somehow, Miss Manners doesn't think that toenails, however stunning, have quite the same effect today. Still, you could show them off in open-toed (now called peep-toe) shoes or sandals with soles.

The propriety of total barefootedness depends on what you mean by an informal dinner. Would it be a picnic on the patio, although this is not the best idea if it is really 100 degrees out? Would the guests know that they need not change from whatever they lounge around in at home?

If it is anything slightly more structured, Miss Manners would recommend starting with shoes, and then kicking them off, as ladies in tight shoes are wont to do under the table even at the most formal dinners.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a very good friend who invited me and my husband over for dinner and told us to get a baby sitter for our daughter.

I probably would get a baby sitter since my 6-year-old daughter would be bored with the adult conversation. However, I was a bit offended by the suggestion. Am I overreacting?

GENTLE READER? No, because had your friends simply issued the invitation to only you and your husband, you would have understood their intentions without the added insult of instructing you on how to make it happen. Right?

Had everyone stuck with that, all would have been well. Your hosts would have accomplished their goal of having an adults-only evening -- and you would have been spared any offense.

However, Miss Manners cannot help but notice that your reason for potentially procuring a baby sitter was not that your daughter's company was not requested, but that she might have been bored. This implies that you might have considered bringing her, asked or not.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: What is the protocol for sharing mobile phone numbers? When someone gives me their mobile number, I don't assume it's OK to give it out (unless that person has so specified). But people just casually ask for other people's numbers like it's no big deal.

I generally reply something like, "I don't have permission to give it out, but if you'll give me yours, I'll ask him to call you," and often I'm accused of being obstructionist or dramatic. Am I?

GENTLE READER: Not in this case, at least. Miss Manners assures you that yours is a perfectly polite way to handle it. If these people feel that you are being overly dramatic, you might tell them, "I'm sure that you wouldn't want me to give out your number to relentless salespeople or overzealous suitors."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it proper etiquette for parents to be invited to their kids' bachelor/bachelorette party?

GENTLE READER: If such a party were so very proper that parents would not be out of place, Miss Manners suggests congratulating the children on their good taste before declining and getting a good night's rest before the more general wedding festivities.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My father received two letters from people he does not know, written on yellow notebook paper. They were variants on "Can I buy your house? Please contact (phone number)."

Our house is not on the market and we have no plans to sell. How should we respond, especially because these letters seem importunate and rude? One does not walk up to someone and say, "I love your coat. Can I buy it from you?" Nor does one write letters to strangers that say, "Can I make love to you? Please call (phone number)."

GENTLE READER: Perhaps there is such a thing as a "Not for Sale" sign?

While Miss Manners agrees that these letters are annoying, your father need only ignore them. However, he might want to do a little background check and make sure that his house is not being listed without his consent.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: There is an old saying my mother-in-law seems to have embraced wholeheartedly: "If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all."

But isn't the saying meant to spare hurt feelings, not cause them? These deafening silences tell me how my mother-in-law truly feels.

The most recent instance came when I redecorated our front porch. My mother-in-law visited and didn't even acknowledge the drastic changes. Instead of saying something like, "I see you have redecorated the front porch," there was this silence on her end, which told me she didn't care for it at all. On the way out of the house, she stood on our front porch and said she liked the neighbor's lawn.

My mother-in-law believes she has impeccable manners. Those manners feel more like weapons. Am I being too sensitive, and is she correct in not even acknowledging things she dislikes?

GENTLE READER: You have not left your mother-in-law any options. You consider her silence rude. Telling you she disapproves of your taste would be ruder. And Miss Manners finds it hard to believe that the flat statement you propose -- merely acknowledging the change -- would be satisfactory.

That leaves vocal approval, a choice your mother-in-law may find distasteful, particularly if she has reason to fear it will be met with accusations of insincerity.

So her policy is a sound one. Miss Manners suggests that you stop worrying about whether your mother-in-law approves of your front porch.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I wanted to invite family and friends to our 25th anniversary dinner party, but I can't afford to pay for everyone's meal. Is there a tactful way to let them know they'll need to pay for their own meals?

GENTLE READER: "We want to honor ourselves with a party that we clearly can't afford, so we are inviting you to pay for it. We will pretend to be your hosts, but if you want anything to eat and drink, you are on your own."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My friend often omits any type of salutation or greeting in her emails. No "Dear So-and-So," or "Hi, So-and-So," although on occasion, she will say "Hi" without using my name and then start her email.

She always signs it with her name -- twice actually, since she has an automatic signature built into her email program.

I interpret this as a lack of respect, and it annoys me so much that I would like to say something to her. But it would probably sound petty to say, "How come you don't call me anything, but sign your own name TWICE?!"

GENTLE READER: Informal emails do not properly require either a salutation or a valediction, although if one uses the former, it is reasonable to pair it with the latter. And if one uses an automatic signature, a valediction is redundant.

Yet Miss Manners agrees that you would look petty to let on that you are keeping score. And if you do, your friend will no doubt counter that she should get credit for having used your name in your email address.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)