DEAR MISS MANNERS: Although gay marriage is a contentious issue in much of the country, it has gained a great deal of support, if not legal recognition. So I was shocked when I told an acquaintance that my partner and I had been married the weekend before and, instead of congratulating me, he rudely asked, "So which one of you is the husband?"
I would expect better from this man, who professionally represents the city as a local television "personality." My stunned silence failed to register in the flurry of activity. Can you suggest a strong yet dignified response?
GENTLE READER: "We both are."
The dignity consists of treating the question as merely another of the tedious questions that newlyweds get about their courtships, married names and plans, rather than assuming that you are special targets for insult.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: After getting married and moving out of state, I have lost contact with several dear friends and close relatives. Three kids later, I've just realized I sorely miss them. I have really been feeling the need to rekindle these friendships. However, I feel guilty because I've missed many important milestones in their lives. What would be the appropriate gesture?
GENTLE READER: Telling them, instead of Miss Manners, that you have missed them.