DEAR ABBY: I am the father of four. I divorced after my third child was born, and I got custody. I have been with my girlfriend, "Wanda," for six years, and we now have a daughter together.

The issue I have is, last year, Father's Day came and went, and Wanda didn't acknowledge it. I didn't even hear a "Happy Father's Day" from her or my youngest child. (My ex-wife acknowledged me.)

I always go above and beyond for Wanda on Mother's Day, Valentine's Day and her birthday, but now, for the first time in our relationship, I felt small and hurt. She apologized the next day and said she forgot it was Father's Day. I accepted her apology but was still hurt, and I said so.

I went through a brutal divorce and fought hard to gain custody of my kids, and raised them on my own for a while. I'm afraid, maybe irrationally, that this Father's Day will be the same, and I'm not sure if I can handle that. Am I overthinking this? -- UNACKNOWLEDGED IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR UNACKNOWLEDGED: I think so. If you and Wanda have a loving relationship 364 days a year, stop nursing this insecurity about one holiday. You have made clear to her how important these special occasions are to you. If she cares about your feelings, it likely will not happen again.

DEAR ABBY: I live in an over-55 community in Florida. A woman I'll call Betty totally ignores me when I pass her on the street or in the clubhouse. If we're at a luncheon together, she won't acknowledge me. Yet, when she sees my husband, she'll kiss him hello (on the cheek) and he'll respond warmly.

I have talked to my husband about how Betty treats me and asked him to back off from her. I'm not suggesting he ignore her, but it isn't necessary to kiss her. He obviously likes the attention she gives him and the flirting. He has told me I'm being juvenile and, frankly, I'm annoyed. Should I be? (By the way, Betty is married and flirts with my husband only when her husband is not around. She doesn't do this with any other man.) -- PUT OFF IN PALM BEACH

DEAR PUT OFF: Face it. You and Betty are never going to be buddies. The next time you see this classless individual, tell her that if she wants to show affection, she should do it with her own husband, not yours. And if she ignores your request, tell her again -- this time in the clubhouse, loudly.

DEAR ABBY: My father and his wife use each other's cellphones interchangeably when they text me. While the number that pops up on my phone might be Dad's, it could just as easily be "Caroline" on the other end.

I have asked them to clarify who I'm talking to before I start texting back, the way we used to do when answering a landline, but they are offended and say I should be able to answer either of them the same way so it doesn't matter who I'm texting. Sometimes I suspect one of them is pretending to be the other. That's weird, right? What should I do in this situation? -- WHO'S TEXTING?

DEAR WHO'S TEXTING: People have a right to know with whom they are communicating. I am trying to decide whether what your father and his wife are doing is overly casual, playful, immature or bizarre. It's definitely unusual behavior. I suppose the way to handle it would be to ask, "Is this Dad, Caroline or 'Dadoline'?" and not respond further until you get an answer.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are expecting a baby in a few months. My father and his wife asked if we would like a large crib/changing table/shelf combination they took a fancy to at an antique store. I politely refused and explained that there is no space in our small apartment. They sent it anyway! Now I have to figure out how to get rid of it because it takes up most of our living room. The piece can't be returned, won't fit in my car, and I can't lift it anyway. I'm hoping the thrift store will pick it up.

My questions are: Must I send a thank you for a gift I explicitly asked them not to send, and what should I say when they discover I've given it away (they are going to be angry), and how do I prevent this from happening again? -- UNWANTED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR UNWANTED: Write your father and stepmother a sweet note thanking them for their thoughtfulness, and include with it a photo or two that show it crowding your living room. The next time you talk with them, explain that space is tight and offer to have it shipped to them to be used when the baby visits. If they agree, you're off the hook. If they don't, sell or donate it.

As to preventing this from happening again, much as you may wish to, you can't control what other people do. You tried that before, and it didn't work.

DEAR ABBY: I am an 18-year-old guy. A lot of my best friends are super cool and absolutely amazing people. All of them share one thing in common. They all dye their hair different unnatural colors, such as green, purple and even rainbow. I have natural hair, but now I feel left out, and I want to do the same. But I wonder what it feels like to have hair like that. Do you have any opinions on the subject or heard of past experiences from anyone about this? -- DYED HAIR HOPEFUL

DEAR DYED HAIR HOPEFUL: Dyeing your hair in a neon color will attract attention, some of it positive and some of it negative. What's important is whether YOU like it and the kind of attention it brings. You will never know until you try it. It's only hair. If you decide you don't like it, you can dye it back to its natural color or cut it off and let it grow out. It's important to remember that hair dye will not make you cool and amazing. You are already those things.

DEAR ABBY: I mentioned to two friends that my best friend was thinking of moving. One of them told the main office of the company they work at. When my best friend found out, she said I had betrayed her, and she no longer wants to be my friend.

I love and miss her. I have tried everything to repair our friendship. She'll say hello when I see her, but she no longer calls or visits me. What can I do to get back in her good graces? I have apologized, but nothing seems to help. Please advise. -- NEEDS MY FRIEND

DEAR NEEDS: If your friend didn't warn you that the discussion about her moving was in confidence, she has no one to blame but herself for the word getting out. Perhaps you should remind her of that fact. I can't guarantee that it will repair your relationship, but if it's the truth, she should hear it.

DEAR ABBY: I am very close to my 19-year-old son. He is kind, sweet and big-hearted. He has learning disabilities and the maturity level of probably a 15- or 16-year-old. Naturally, I am protective of him. He had one girlfriend during his senior year, and when they broke up after four months, he was beyond devastated. Since then he constantly talks about how lonely he is and his desire to be in a relationship.

About a week ago, he told me he likes a woman from his work. They went out on a couple of dates and, come to find out, she's 33 and has three kids (9, 7 and 8 months old). He told me she asked him if he wanted to be in a serious relationship or just be friends with benefits. He told her he wanted something serious, and I guess she agreed.

Abby, this woman is taking advantage of my son! What would a woman that age want with a kid? This is a complicated nightmare, and I do not want my son involved with her. I'm convinced she's using him, and once she is over it, she will break his heart. It took him a long time to get over his high school sweetheart, and I was seriously worried about his mental well-being. Is there anything I can do to stop this train wreck?

I have talked to him about my concerns, but it didn't accomplish anything. I told him I want to meet her, and they agreed. I'm nervous because I know I need to refrain from telling her how I really feel. Any suggestions? -- PROTECTIVE MOM

DEAR MOM: Not all romances are guaranteed to last, as most adults find out after they enter the dating scene. At 19 -- learning disabilities or not -- your son is considered to be an adult. Part of becoming one is experiencing life with all of its joys and disappointments.

You cannot protect your son from sadness or predict how his relationships will turn out. Let him know that you are supportive of him always. Then, when you meet this woman, be warm and befriend her. Get to know her so you can communicate with her without her becoming defensive. You will gain nothing by seeming hostile.

DEAR ABBY: About 12 years ago, I found out my dad isn't really my father. It didn't change how I felt about him, and I wasn't interested in meeting my biological father.

Dad died a couple of weeks ago. During the memorial service, I ended my emotional tribute to him by saying that even though he wasn't my bio father, he was still my "Dad," and the love and memories I have of him mean more than any blood ties to my bio father.

My brother and one of my sisters had no problem with me saying this. My other sister, however, was very upset with me. She said letting church members know he wasn't my bio father was disrespectful. She was the only one who criticized me. Was I disrespectful, and was my sister correct in chastising me? -- LOVED MY DAD

DEAR LOVED: The eulogy you gave for your dad was beautiful, and it came from the heart. It was in no way disrespectful and you did nothing wrong. Your sister should not have criticized you the way she did, but when there is a death in the family, emotions sometimes run high.