DEAR ABBY: My daughter is a professional woman in her mid-20s. She works in a demanding field with a lot of overtime. She lives an hour away from us and is financially independent, but depends on us often for favors.

She has been dating a man for a year and a half who doesn't even call her his "girlfriend." We have never met him. He sees her when it's convenient for him, sometimes for an hour at 11 on a Sunday night after he's spent the weekend with his friends. (We both know what to call that.) She has never asked him to feed or baby-sit her cat, help her move furniture, pick up an item from a store or anything. She asks us.

We are in our 60s. We feel it's time for her to find a loving, considerate life partner, but she's content with her present "relationship." She has had relationships before with thoughtful, helpful guys, so I'm not sure why she is rationalizing this man's self-centered behavior.

He is now moving 600 miles away, but plans to continue seeing her. He hasn't asked her to join him, although she considered uprooting herself from her job and family to do so. How can I make her see that she has no future with this man and needs to find a real partner in life? -- WON'T BE AROUND FOREVER

DEAR WON'T: Are you sure he isn't married or in a long-term relationship with someone else? I don't blame you for being a concerned parent, but this is a realization your daughter is going to have to arrive at in her own time. Badgering her is counterproductive.

Could it be your independent daughter likes the "freedom" this relationship provides? If you are doing your daughter favors the "boyfriend" should be providing, cut it out. It's possible that the move he's making will cause him to drift out of her life so things can end naturally. Cross your fingers.

DEAR ABBY: I am a morning person, and my newly retired husband is the opposite. At night in our bedroom, he reads on his iPad for several hours while I try to sleep. I am in bed by 11 while my husband usually stays up till 1 or 2 a.m. If I wake up, he's on our couch in the bedroom with a glow of light from the iPad. But it bothers me that he is in the same room staying up to read.

We have been married 45 years and usually went to bed at the same time because of work, but now that he's retired, he says he likes reading, watching movies or watching videos on YouTube. I think he should read in another room (better for his eyes) and not the room I am sleeping in. He doesn't want to sit in our living room.

Bottom line: It bothers me that one person is doing an activity while the other sleeps or tries to sleep. What would be your advice? -- DISORDERED SLEEP IN COLORADO

DEAR DISORDERED SLEEP: Because you need a solid night's sleep in order to function properly the next day, your husband should move to a different room if he wants to read so he won't disturb you. It's called demonstrating consideration for one's spouse.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for seven years and have two young boys. My husband, "Cliff," and I earn approximately the same amount and contribute equally to our household expenses.

It bothers me that if we're on a family excursion, and he's driving my minivan and we get low on gas, he will fill the tank up only halfway. Additionally, when we met my friend recently for a birthday celebration, when we were leaving the parking garage, Cliff demanded my credit card to pay for the parking. (The fee was $13.)

Unlike his past girlfriends, I have never used his credit cards to buy fancy clothes at expensive boutiques. I pay for house renovations that I feel are important -- porch repair, wallpaper, bedroom furniture for our children, recessed lighting, etc. out of my own pocket.

For our upcoming anniversary, when I asked Cliff where we would be going so I could plan accordingly, he asked me why I wasn't taking him out to celebrate our anniversary. What do you make of all of this? Frankly, it saddens me. -- MONEY'S THE ISSUE IN VIRGINIA

DEAR ISSUE: You are short-changing yourself. If you and your husband agreed to split expenses equally, you should not be paying out-of-pocket for repairs and decoration. That your husband is so determined not to be taken advantage of financially that he would fill the gas tank only halfway saddens me, too.

However, on the subject of anniversaries, he does have a valid point, so why not alternate anniversaries with him? One year he'll do the planning and take you out to celebrate, and the next year you'll do it for him.

DEAR ABBY: My son moved back home after college two years ago. He had major surgery on his leg two weeks after his graduation and a 14-month recuperation, which I helped him through. He hasn't been able to find work in his field of study. He did work for about three months, then quit.

He bought an expensive rottweiler puppy while he was working, but now he's unable to pay for the shots, food and general care of this puppy. I'm struggling financially and cannot afford to help with the expenses.

The puppy is destroying my house, pulling my sofa cushions from the sofa, gnawing on my woodwork, etc. My son is accusing me of being "materialistic and selfish." I feel he should have waited until he had his own place before he got a dog. I already have one, "Siggy," that was my son's when he was 10 years old. He no longer wants Siggy because he's old now. I love Siggy as my own, and one dog is enough for me now. Please advise. -- CARELESS IN TEXAS

DEAR CARELESS: Your son may be chronologically an adult, but he's acting like a spoiled child. Rather than call you names, he should be grateful you have supported him to the degree that you have. Start talking to him like the grown-up he is and tell him if he can't support his rottweiler, he must contact a rescue group that can find it a loving home with a responsible guardian who will ensure it receives the care it deserves. Unfortunately, your son does not qualify.

DEAR ABBY: I am 25 and have been with my boyfriend on and off for five years. I love him very much. I often overthink things, and a constant frustration of mine is that he makes no romantic gestures at all. He drowns me in compliments and shows his love in other ways.

I always have to take the initiative and suggest he do romantic things like send me cards or flowers, take me to dinner, etc., but he only does them when I ask. It doesn't feel like enough for me. I worry that when we get married, over time I will grow bored or no longer be attracted to him because he is so unromantic. Am I just overthinking? What should I do? -- ROMANTIC ONE IN AUSTIN

DEAR ROMANTIC: From what you have written it seems that you may be more in love with the idea of romantic gestures than you are with the man you have. Many women would be thrilled to have someone who drowns them with compliments and shows his love in other ways. If you are truly worried that you will be bored if you marry him or -- worse -- turned off, then please, turn him loose so he can find someone who appreciates him for who he is, and you can meet someone who will make your dreams come true.

DEAR ABBY: My friend who was suddenly widowed two years ago continues to insert her late husband into every conversation with friends and strangers alike. She's still depressed, grieving and searching for significance, and she shares it all in person and online.

Early on, she had counseling but no longer feels it necessary. She claims it helps her to talk about him constantly. Most of us close to her avoid the elephant in the room. I find myself apologizing for her in group gatherings I take her to. People try to offer sympathy, but are surprised when they realize he's been gone two years.

I endure with love, but wonder if this is the best path. Personally, I want to let him rest in peace. But that's hard when he's always "in the room." Advice? -- WANTING TO MOVE FORWARD

DEAR WANTING: Everyone grieves in their own way and on their own timetable. However, your friend may need more support and counseling than you and others she meets socially can offer. She has my sympathy, but that deeply grieving woman needs to hear what you have written to me. Tell her, as kindly as possible, that she needs to vent to a professional so she can get more help through this difficult period.

DEAR ABBY: A male family friend who is gay works at a local business my wife and I patronize regularly. We always stop and chat when he's there, but he does something that irritates me. He addresses my wife as "Sweetie." My wife thinks I'm being silly because he's gay; I say one's sexual orientation doesn't negate manners and how one man should address another man's wife. I'm not annoyed to the point that I'd confront the guy, but I promised my wife I'd ask you your opinion. -- BOTHERED IN NEW YORK

DEAR BOTHERED: There is nothing rude about a family friend -- gay or straight -- calling someone's wife "Sweetie." My opinion is you should lighten up.