DEAR ABBY: I had a baby girl with my longtime best friend, "Adam." "April" is now 3 weeks old. I thought everything would be OK as co-parents because, even though we're not together, we get along and almost never fight.

Six weeks before April was born, Adam began seeing a girl we both knew from high school. The girl, "Jenny," and I have a horrible past. She used to bully me.

My problem with Jenny being around is she's disrespectful. She and Adam argue all the time because she forces things that shouldn't be a problem into becoming a problem. When I visit so Adam can see April, Jenny often interjects her own opinions about my baby as if she knows better than I do.

I recently found out that Adam is planning to marry Jenny. We have been fighting because I don't want her around my daughter. Adam believes it's not fair to push her out of the room when April is around, and that Jenny should be a part of family events reserved for only parents and the child, like taking formal pictures and such.

Am I irrational or crazy? I care about Adam because of our long history of friendship. I did a lot to help him get off drugs and keep his life together, and now here she is messing it up. I told him if he's happy with her, then fine, but I don't want Jenny around my baby. We cannot seem to come to an agreement unless I fold. -- CO-PARENTING ON THE EAST COAST

DEAR CO-PARENTING: You are neither irrational nor crazy. I'm sorry your relationship with Adam didn't work out as you had hoped it would. However, if Adam marries Jenny, she will be April's stepmother. It would be unrealistic for you to expect she leave the room when you bring the baby to visit her daddy. In that case, it might be better if you accept the things you cannot change.

DEAR ABBY: My fiance, "Allan's," great-grandfather recently passed away. We lived with him, as did Allan's mother and uncle. Allan was his full-time caregiver.

My fiance's mother is thinking about buying the house and says we should all pay rent to her. I have lived here for six years and I'm comfortable here. The one thing I'm wary about is, if it becomes her house, that she'll start treating us like children.

Allan and I are in our late 20s. I'm not comfortable walking on eggshells, and I'm afraid she will make it clear that we are living in her house. In my opinion, if people are paying rent, it should feel like their home, too.

Am I being a brat? And once it becomes her house, should I just lay all my worries on the line to her? -- NOT A CHILD IN THE WEST

DEAR NOT A CHILD: You are not being a brat. You are an adult, and an intelligent one. By all means lay all your concerns on the table -- the sooner the better. That way, Allan's mother can either allay them, or you and your fiance can make plans to find another place to live. If his mother needs the income that would come from having renters, she may be less inclined to behave as you fear.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I met four years ago, have been married for two and I still haven't met her mother. My mother-in-law, a homophobic, self-proclaimed "evangelist prophet," refuses to acknowledge our union.

Her behavior upsets my wife, which angers me to the point that I have no desire to ever cross paths with her. My wife sometimes cries about this wedge in their relationship, which only makes me resent my mother-in-law more. Is there something I should do or say to either of them that might possibly help all of us deal with this turmoil a little better? -- FRUSTRATED LESBIAN-IN-LAW

DEAR FRUSTRATED: If the wedge in your wife's relationship with her evangelist prophet mother is that she is a lesbian and married, there is nothing you can do. Your mother-in-law will either, with time, come to accept it (don't hold your breath), or your wife will learn through counseling that it is not her responsibility to sacrifice her happiness to please her mother. I hope you will encourage your wife to do that.

DEAR ABBY: I have been a daily reader of your column since I was a little girl, so your answer to my question will be valued.

I eat an apple every day on my drive home from work, and when I'm done, I toss the core out the window. I try my best to support the Earth, and I believe I am feeding the rabbits and birds with my apple a day. Friends insist that what I'm doing is littering and helping neither the furry friends nor the environment. Can you help solve the debate -- to toss or not to toss? Thanks! -- AN APPLE A DAY

DEAR A.A.A.D.: I, too, love our furry and feathered creatures, but I agree with your friends. What you are doing is littering, regardless of how you're rationalizing it. If you truly want to support the Earth, keep a small container in your vehicle for the apple core and dispose of it when you get home.

DEAR ABBY: I just got together with a guy I really like. We have been dating for about a week, but now I realize I'm just not ready to start dating. I'm 15 and I don't feel I'm mature enough. Also, I don't want a boyfriend because I'm moving in a month. Help! I don't know if I should break up with him. What do I do? -- CALIFORNIA TEEN

DEAR CALIFORNIA TEEN: Because you are moving in about a month, I don't think breaking up in the formal sense is necessary. It couldn't hurt to tell him you think you may have gotten serious too quickly, because getting serious after a week of dating is too quickly. I have a hunch that once you have moved, distance will solve your problem for you.

P.S. Now that you realize you're not ready to date, when you have made the move, take a break from romance and concentrate on your studies. You won't be sorry.

DEAR ABBY: My 22-year-old son is going to visit his father and get his third tattoo. I don't like it, but I can't control my son. He's an adult. His father is retired and lives on his wife's pension. It is my understanding that they are wealthy.

My concern is for our 14-year-old daughter. My ex thinks tattoos are cool, and when he talks to her via Skype, he talks about the next tattoo he is going to get. I'm afraid that when she's 18, he will take her to get a tattoo as a bonding experience.

His life is far removed from my daughter's. He is surrounded by actors, entertainers and artists. Our child (hopefully) will have a rich, abundant life in an ordinary way. She is focused on her studies and does well in school because of her efforts. How can I impress upon my not-so-confident, shy child that getting a tattoo is not a good idea? -- MARY IN MISSOURI

DEAR MARY: Discouraging your daughter from getting a tattoo should be part of an ongoing conversation. Explain that -- unlike makeup or temporary tats -- the real thing is permanent. Once it's on, there is no going back. It will be there for the rest of her life unless she has it professionally removed. Point out that tattoo removal is not only expensive, but also painful, and her skin will not look the way it did before she got inked -- she will be scarred.

Hopefully, it may make her less susceptible to "bonding" with her father in that way. Ultimately, however, when she's 18 and an adult, she will make her own decision about getting tattooed or remaining ink-free.

DEAR ABBY: My brother and sister-in-law have four children, ages 11, 10, 4 and 3. They are financially strapped and can't afford to take the children to entertainment or cultural events because every dime is spent for essentials.

I'm financially stable and childless. I take the older children to various activities once every month or so. I don't include the younger ones because they are unruly. I feel somewhat guilty for not including them. However, I want to continue doing it for the older children so they'll be exposed to various events they couldn't see otherwise.

Am I wrong for not wanting to be responsible for the younger children, or should I stop taking any of them out to be fair? -- TRYING MY BEST IN THE SOUTH

DEAR TRYING: Explain to the parents, if you haven't already, that you would love to include the younger children, but that you are unable to because of their unruly behavior, which you are unable to control. What you're doing is not "unfair"; it is wise. If you were to take all four and not be able to control them, one of the little ones could be seriously injured.

Think of some other way you can make the younger children feel special. Perhaps taking them to a park occasionally would make them feel less left out.