DEAR ABBY: I am a 12-year-old girl, and my grandpa is 75. I love him very much, but I have noticed lately that he stares at women's breasts when they are jogging, and he smiles when a gust of wind blows a girl's skirt up. This embarrasses me, and I am embarrassed for him. He must have realized it by now.

Is my grandpa a creepy, dirty old man? I hope it's not true. Please answer this in the newspaper because I don't want my family to see it. -- CARRIE IN CLEVELAND

DEAR CARRIE: I'm sorry, but the fact that your grandfather would be so unsubtle as to act this way when you're with him is creepy, and I'm sure it is embarrassing. Tell your parents about it so your mother or father can tell him to tone down his "enthusiasm." And if it doesn't happen, spend less time with Grandpa.

DEAR ABBY: My fiancee, "Caitlyn," and I are in our 40s and have been living together for a year. My family has invited us to go on a cruise for New Year's, all expenses paid. Because Caitlyn can't get time off from her job at the hospital, she doesn't want me to go, either.

Also, in the fall I will be traveling to Europe with my dad to visit relatives. (He's 80.) These trips don't happen all the time; it's an unusual year.

Should I refuse the cruise and miss out on being with my extended family to stay home with her while she works? I think Caitlyn's being selfish to expect me to. We spend all our free time together. We have been to Las Vegas and on a cruise recently. Please advise. -- HELD BACK IN OHIO

DEAR HELD BACK: You and Caitlyn are adults in your 40s. At that age, Caitlyn should be independent enough to tell you to go and have a good time with your family. And you should be mature enough to discuss this with her without involving me.

DEAR ABBY: My sister loaned me her car when she went out of town so I could drop her at the airport and pick her up. (I don't have a car of my own, but share one with my husband.) While I was driving her car, one of the tires blew. She says I should pay for the replacement tire because I was driving the car on an errand that was unrelated to picking her up when the tire blew. I disagree. Who is right? -- JENNIFER IN FLORIDA

DEAR JENNIFER: If the agreement between you and your sister was that her car was to be used only to take her to the airport and pick her up, then you owe her a new tire. However, if her tires were so worn that they could cause an accident, then she should replace her own tire -- and the other three as well.

DEAR ABBY: My son's wife passed away very recently. He works days, so I have been helping him by looking after his 15-year-old daughter, "Leyla."

Leyla recently told her father that her boyfriend, "Dylan," has asked her to vandalize things -- TV, Blu-ray player, etc. -- if her daddy enrolls her in a private school or moves her to another school closer to his company for a better education. Leyla's grades aren't good, and she spends most of her time chatting or texting with Dylan.

Abby, I'm really worried. The last thing Dylan asked her to do was kill her daddy because "he controls her too much." Before school ended, Dylan skipped a field trip. He didn't want Leyla to participate either because he feared that without him, she might have a chance to make friends with others, so she didn't turn in her paperwork and stayed home.

We plan to send her to a psychologist in the coming weeks. Should we bring this problem to the attention of her school principal? Thank you for your help. -- WORRIED SICK IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR WORRIED SICK: I'm glad your granddaughter will soon see a therapist. I'm sure they'll have a lot to talk about.

Because Leyla is in constant communication with Dylan, take her cellphone away and monitor her activity on the computer. That he would ask her to damage property or cause physical harm to another person is something that should be immediately reported not only to the school principal, but also to his parents and the police. This young man could be dangerous to the adults in your family, as well as to your granddaughter unless there is an intervention now.

DEAR ABBY: I have been feeling super alone lately. I'm a full-time, stay-at-home mom. My fiance and I have an 11-month-old son. Before he was born, I worked and my fiance didn't. Then we moved away from my family to where his family is -- a town of about 400 people -- and he works while I stay home with the baby.

This is a small town, and I have no friends here. I have been feeling extremely stir-crazy and trapped in my head. I don't know how to handle it. I spoke to a psychiatrist. She said it'll pass, but it hasn't.

Please, if you have any advice, I need some badly. -- STUCK IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR STUCK: In many small Southern towns, the social life revolves around the church. If you and your fiance haven't joined one, you should consider it. If you do, your chances of making friends -- possibly with some other young couples -- will be improved. Also consider volunteering or going to a nearby larger town to look for activities. I hope this will help to relieve your sense of isolation.

DEAR ABBY: I am being married later this year, and I'm planning my guest list. My cousin "Emily" has five young children who I'm making an exception to invite. She lives across the country, so she's starting to book her plane reservations.

Emily just announced that she's being remarried and her fiance has three children he shares joint custody of. Am I obligated to invite three children I have never met? This is causing a lot of grief between me and my fiance because Emily assumes that they are all welcome. Please advise. -- D.C. IN NYC

DEAR D.C.: Call Cousin Emily. Explain that your guest list is limited and that her five children -- to whom you are related -- are the exceptions. No other children have been invited to the wedding, and you would prefer to get to know her fiance's children under less stressful circumstances.

Emily's wrong to assume she can include anyone whose name wasn't on her wedding invitation. The children can stay with their mother or grandparents during the time their father will be away.

DEAR ABBY: My husband prefers leftovers to sandwiches for his work lunch. He generally takes them in reusable plastic bowls that claim to be dishwasher and microwave safe.

After a short time, these bowls become terribly stained. Not only are they unsightly, but sometimes they harbor odors. Even though they have been thoroughly washed, they seem unclean. We have noticed this happens more often with tomato-based food like spaghetti or barbecue.

I have tried soaking the bowls overnight in dishwashing detergent and even using a small amount of bleach, but the stains remain. Is there a way to remove the stains and odors, or must I continue to buy new bowls and throw the stained ones out? -- BOWLED OVER IN ALABAMA

DEAR BOWLED OVER: According to "Haley's Hints," by Graham and Rosemary Haley (New American Library), if you soak the bowls and lids in cold water for five minutes or more before putting the leftovers into them, you can prevent the staining from happening. And the odors can be removed by placing crumpled newspaper inside them and putting the tops on before storing them. (This is also an effective way to deodorize shoes.)

DEAR ABBY: My daughter just got remarried to a man who has a 10-year-old son. I don't know the boy at all. What is the appropriate name he should call me? My daughter already has two boys from her first marriage and they, of course, call me Grandma. I don't feel comfortable having her new stepson call me Grandma. Any suggestions? -- NAMELESS IN NEW YORK

DEAR NAMELESS: Is your heart really so closed that you would tell that boy he isn't welcome in it? I urge you to be more accepting of this child, or you may get a name that isn't fit for a family newspaper -- and not only will the boy be using it, but also his father.