DEAR ABBY: Is it acceptable to bring a teacup-sized dog to a wedding? The excuse was, "Well, the wedding was at the beach." The pre-dinner and dancing were inside a high-end resort on the beach. The dog was taken inside these establishments.

After a guest -- a family member of the dog's owner -- asked the owner to remove the animal because the occasion was not about her and her dog but the bride and groom's day, the owner put the dog in a carrying case and the dog returned to the wedding for the rest of the night. Only this one couple made an issue of it and they weren't in the wedding party, but relations of the dog owner. What do you think? -- DOGGONE DISGUSTED

DEAR DOGGONE DISGUSTED: The rule of etiquette states that nothing should distract attention from the happy couple -- and especially the bride -- at the wedding. However, if the dog owner had first asked for and received permission to bring the animal to the festivities, then it wasn't rude and the relatives of the dog owner were wrong to intervene.

DEAR ABBY: We were recently at dinner with longtime friends whose political views are different from ours. I believe in the rule of etiquette about avoiding the topics of politics and religion in mixed company. Well, somehow the conversation turned political. Voices were raised and I stood up and ended it.

There are now many hurt feelings with the parties involved still disagreeing about what happened and how it was handled. I know my actions were extreme, but things were out of control and I was upset. How do I deal with this if we are invited to future events? -- KEEPING THE PEACE

DEAR KEEPING THE PEACE: You may be worrying needlessly, because you may not be invited to future events -- at least until the next election is over. Whatever your friends were arguing about, while you had a right to speak up and say it was making you uncomfortable, because your reaction was "extreme," you may have been as rude as the others. If you caused hurt feelings that evening, you should apologize, if you haven't already.

DEAR ABBY: A sibling died recently and I have received numerous sympathy messages in the form of cards, gifts and online posts. Do the people who send them typically expect a response? I feel a little overwhelmed with the amount of attention, and I worry that they'll think I'm not appreciative if I don't respond in kind. What is your advice? -- GRIEVING BUT GRATEFUL

DEAR GRIEVING BUT GRATEFUL: Their kindness should be acknowledged. To those who sent gifts and cards, a short note saying how much their support meant during this difficult time would be a gracious response. The online condolences could be handled with one email "blast" conveying the same thing, which shouldn't be offensive to those who sent their sympathy that way.

DEAR ABBY: My granddaughter "Cindy," age 2, was being watched by her mommy's ex-sister-in-law and her sons. Cindy went to her mommy and said, "Bubby hurt me." Bubby is what she calls her 10-year-old cousin. Her mother called the police. A policeman spoke to her and said there wasn't enough evidence. Now my granddaughter is scared of men.

The police went and talked to the cousin who said he "accidentally touched her down there with her pull-up on." DCFS was called in, and again it was a man. We took Cindy to a female doctor and Cindy told the doctor everything that happened to her. Now she wakes up having nightmares and yells, "No, Bubby. Stop!"

What's a grandmother to do to help her? We need justice for Cindy. -- DISTRAUGHT GRANDMOTHER

DEAR DISTRAUGHT: You may need justice for Cindy, but what Cindy needs right now is professional help to get past the trauma of what was done to her. Contact the nearest rape treatment center, tell them everything you have told me and ask for their assistance in finding therapy for your grandchild. They hear stories like this all too often.

The boy who assaulted Cindy also needs counseling so that he won't/can't repeat what he did to her with another little girl. From my perspective, both of these children need professional help.

DEAR ABBY: For years I dated guys who I knew wanted a committed relationship, while I just wanted to have fun. I enjoyed being single and never saw myself getting married. My mom was married three times to men who abused her. It made the idea of marriage terrifying to me.

Through counseling, I have found healing from my past. I regret the damage I caused by leading guys on. Now that I want to be married, my life feels empty. While I used to enjoy my independence, I now want to share my experiences with someone.

Because of the counseling I have had, I know what I shouldn't settle for, but the only guys asking me out are sleazy. I feel like in some ways life was easier when I wanted to stay single. How do I find a healthy balance so I won't go back to my old ways or end up settling out of desperation? -- HEALED BUT CONFUSED

DEAR HEALED BUT CONFUSED: One way would be to continue the counseling. While you may want to be married now, desperation and neediness are not traits that attract worthwhile men.

You need to be prepared to take some time and find a balance in your life while you're looking for Mr. Right. Explore your own interests, make friends with members of both sexes, do some volunteering if you have the time. If you do, the chances of your meeting the right kind of man will improve because you will have more to offer.

DEAR READERS: On April 11, I printed a letter from "Wondering in Washington," a man asking why young men in general today have the attitude that "any money I earn is mine" in a marriage or live-in situation. He said when he married, he and his wife considered what they earned to be "theirs" -- not his or hers. When I asked my "younger readers" to chime in, I was inundated. Some excerpts:

DEAR ABBY: My husband was 26 and I was 24 when we got married. To me, how young couples handle money says a lot about their attitude toward marriage.

My mother always said, "If you can't trust a man with your money, why would you trust him with your heart?" I kept that in mind when I was dating, so when my boyfriend and I married, we didn't have serious underlying issues like addiction, compulsive spending, etc. -- MOM OF 2 IN SEATTLE

DEAR ABBY: My first husband controlled all the money, my pay and his. He bought what he wanted, but didn't always pay the mortgage or utilities.

In my second marriage, my money is my money and his money is his. If I earn 60 percent of the income, I pay 60 percent of the shared bills. Whatever is left is up to my own discretion to spend, and the same goes for his paycheck. -- LEARNED MY LESSON IN FLORIDA

DEAR ABBY: I'm a man in my mid-30s; my wife is in her mid-20s. Many of our friends keep their finances separate, and the reason usually involves hearing their parents argue over money. What I find interesting is that the wife usually came up with the idea.

I believe the separation of incomes starts with young women embracing messages of empowerment they heard growing up and applying them not only to the workplace, but home, as well -- plus a healthy dose of entitlement that seems common to their generation. -- JUST SAYING, IN WISCONSIN

DEAR ABBY: Male reader here. Gone are the days of the stay-at-home wife who takes care of the house and raises the children. I'm as guilty of those preconceptions as anyone. I thought marriage meant being totally devoted to your spouse and you discussed everything.

I now believe both parties in a relationship have financial responsibilities to the other. In my first marriage, the majority of financial responsibilities fell on me. The financial obligations in my second marriage are different. We have a separate maintenance agreement. I pay only part of our living expenses. I can spend whatever I want, when I want, on whatever I want. This has prevented many disagreements.

I think the way to handle finances in a relationship is a rock-solid legal agreement and a lot of premarital counseling. Then there are no surprises. -- J.G. IN TEXAS

DEAR ABBY: I'm 32, recently married. I earn more than my husband, and I'm better at managing money.

We plan to set up a joint account for household expenses, joint vacations, etc., and maintain individual accounts for whatever money is left. That way, we have a certain amount of independence and freedom.

We don't consider our relationship to be disposable. But when you grow up like we did and don't marry until your 30s, you live a considerable amount of your life independently. We are happy with this arrangement. -- MODERN MARRIAGE IN MICHIGAN