DEAR ABBY: Our neighbors of 14 years watch our dog while we are away, which is quite often. They have free access to our home with the key we have given them.

Two months ago, the husband hit on me, really pushing the issue for me to have sex with him. Then he apologized like it was nothing. I was upset, scared, shocked and told my husband because I was concerned. My husband was not happy about it.

We have not been able to look at him or his wife (my friend) since then. We are all middle-aged. Should I tell her why we have been absent, or can you help me figure out what to do? -- BADLY IN NEED OF ADVICE

DEAR BADLY IN NEED: Make other plans for your dog when you travel, change the locks on your doors, and if your friend asks why you have been "absent," tell her why. She may not like to hear it, but she should know that if your friendship with her is going to continue, it will have to be without her husband being included. (She should have herself checked for STDs in case her husband has managed to get lucky with a neighbor who was willing.)

DEAR ABBY: I'm 31 and have been married to my husband for 2 1/2 years. He wants a baby in the worst way. I don't, and I have been clear about it.

Abby, my husband helps with nothing. I'm constantly cleaning, doing the laundry and cooking meals. That's OK, but I'd like some help. I have asked him many times to do things before football comes on or to take a break from Netflix and get something done. It never happens. I have been nice about it, and I have been angry.

We agreed to buy a bigger house and then have a baby, but at this rate, I already have one -- my husband! Is there any hope? -- MAMA ALREADY

DEAR MAMA ALREADY: No, I don't think so. You married a man who is lazy, or passive aggressive and angry at your refusal to have a baby, or has been so spoiled by his mother that he thinks this is a normal way to live. Counseling might help you get through to him, but I wouldn't bet on it.

DEAR ABBY: I am 10 years old and I have a major boy problem. My ex (Bob) broke up with me, and I felt funny around him and a little mad. So I kind of moved on. I went to my crush who had previously asked me out, and I said yes. Now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do. I asked my mom and didn't like the answer, so now I'm asking you. -- CONFUSED GIRL IN ARKANSAS

DEAR CONFUSED GIRL: I don't know what your mother told you, but here's my advice: At 10, you're too young to be in an exclusive relationship with anyone. Because you regret saying yes to your crush, tell him your mother disapproves and you cannot go against her wishes.

DEAR ABBY: Can you please tell me the proper way to eat a taco salad? Do you crunch up the taco bowl, eat everything out of it and then eat the taco bowl? I asked my husband, and he said to ask you. -- TRACI IN AMSTERDAM, N.Y.

DEAR TRACI: There are no rules of etiquette governing how to eat a taco salad. However, when I order one, I usually eat the contents of the bowl, then chip off pieces of the tortilla if I still have enough room to nibble. I have also seen diners order the salad and ask that it be served on a salad plate ("Hold the taco!") in order to save a few calories.

DEAR ABBY: When my husband died, he didn't have a lot of possessions. He died without a will, so what little he had is now with me. My problem is my mother-in-law keeps asking that I return things she gave him.

I wouldn't mind if she has them, but she has been giving them to his children, who hated him and were rude and disrespectful. They neither called nor came to see him during his long illness. They didn't even bother to come to his funeral.

I feel they want his things only because they think they might be of some value, not out of any respect or affection. My kids showed him more respect and love than his own did, and I'd rather they have his things.

Should I be honest and tell my mother-in-law why I won't give her any more of his possessions? I just don't know what to do. -- OKLAHOMA WIDOW

DEAR WIDOW: It's sad that your stepchildren ignored their father during his illness and chose to skip his funeral. Be sure to point that out when you tell your former mother-in-law you have other plans for the items. She may not like hearing it, but once a gift is given, it belongs to the recipient. And because her son died without a will, the recipient is you, his widow.

DEAR ABBY: I am part of a group of neighbors who often go out to dinner together. However, one woman often talks loudly on her cellphone at the dinner table, and it makes the rest of us feel uncomfortable and insignificant. It has gotten so bad we have stopped inviting her.

I feel sorry for her and wonder if I should explain the reason she's being excluded. What is the best way to handle this dilemma? -- FRIEND IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

DEAR FRIEND: If done discreetly and kindly, it might benefit the woman to know why she's no longer included. Frankly, you'd be doing her a favor because her behavior was rude.

DEAR ABBY: I have been seeing a guy, "Karl," for eight months now, and we have never had sex. After two or three months, I brought up the subject. He said he was stressed because he had just lost his job. He also said there is never any privacy at his place because he has roommates/tenants. I offered to go to my place, but he said that with my son there, it's the same issue.

Karl says he's very attracted to me, but doesn't want our "time" together to be ruined by his current money problems. I told him I understood and I have waited. I also explained that it makes me feel insecure and unwanted.

He now has a job, but we still haven't had sex. He has, in the interim, told me he loves me and wants to marry me. I constantly worry that there's someone else and wonder what's wrong with me. I love Karl, too, but I don't know what to do. Please help. -- LOVE, BUT NO SEX IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR LOVE, BUT: Is there any intimacy at all in your relationship with Karl? Is he affectionate? Is there any physical response when he holds and kisses you? If the answer is no, your boyfriend may have a physical or emotional problem, be asexual or gay.

Before agreeing to marry him, I recommend you schedule some time alone together by spending a few romantic weekends at a hotel or motel. It may give you a better idea of what your future would be like if you two decide to tie the knot.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 30-year-old gay man who works in an office with 20 women. In the five years I have worked here, many of my co-workers have either gotten married or had children.

Our office has a tradition of throwing showers for the lucky ladies, and I am always asked to contribute money toward food for the party or an extravagant gift.

While I'm happy to donate to a charity or help a friend in need, I wonder if a wedding or a baby shower would be given for me? Am I selfish for feeling hesitant to donate money or gifts when it's likely the favor will never be returned? -- MINORITY MALE IN TEXAS

DEAR MINORITY: I don't think you are selfish for feeling the way you do. In fact, it's understandable. However, in the case of a wedding or baby shower, people give gifts as a way of offering congratulations and good wishes. And I would hope that, even if same-sex marriage isn't recognized by the state of Texas, your co-workers would do something to honor you if you had a spiritual ceremony, which some religious denominations offer.

DEAR ABBY: I am turning 60 and naturally looking a little "worn." My man friend keeps telling me I need a facelift and to lose 10 pounds, so I'm starting to save my money. Something tells me he wants a "hot chick" and thinks he'll have one once I get these procedures done. It's expensive. What do you think? -- LOOSE-FACED LOUISIANAN

DEAR LOUISIANAN: It's not only expensive; as with any other major surgery, there is some risk involved. If you had said you wanted cosmetic surgery because you thought you needed it, I would say to go ahead. However, if it's only because your man friend is pushing you, then he should save his money and offer to foot the bill.

P.S. He must be an optimist because there is no guarantee that with 10 pounds off and a new face you wouldn't start looking for a younger man. Some women do.