DEAR ABBY: I was moved by the letter from "Losing Slowly in Ohio" (Jan. 14), who is 50 pounds overweight and walks every day with her friend to lose weight. She said that almost daily people made fun of them. My heart goes out to her.

I was in her shoes once. With diet and exercise I lost more than 60 pounds, and I've kept it off. But I was never ridiculed as she was. On the contrary, one day after I had just begun a daily 1-mile jog and was struggling to keep going, I passed by a man who cheerfully called out to me to "keep at it, and one day you'll be a 10!"

Abby, I can't tell you what that meant to me. I thought about his encouragement whenever I felt hopeless and was thinking of giving up. The memory of his kind words inspired me to go on. Thirty years later, I still think about his encouragement with amazement and gratitude.

We all have a choice: We can be kind to each other and offer friends and strangers alike support for the challenges we all face, or we can make ourselves feel superior by being cruel and demeaning. In the end, our choice shapes our character and we receive what we give, so we must choose wisely.

I'm sorry that "Losing" has met with only ignorant jerks so far. I would be honored to pay it forward and tell her how incredibly brave she is, and to encourage her to stick with it. Because she has the courage to keep exercising in the face of constant humiliation, I know without a doubt that she will reach her goals. -- WENDY IN COLORADO

DEAR WENDY: Thank you for your upbeat response. Many other readers were quick to "weigh in" with letters of support for "Losing Slowly":

DEAR ABBY: I, too, have a weight problem, which I am working to resolve. But I can tell you from experience that the worst kind of discrimination is directed against people with weight problems. I have been insulted in the workplace, in restaurants and doctor's offices. I have not been hired for jobs because I am perceived as fat and lazy.

I am not lazy! I keep a clean house, work hard at my job as a secretary every day, and I am a good wife and parent. We may ignore it and pretend that it doesn't hurt us or matter, but I can tell you it is painful, demeaning, and it doesn't go away. I have been in meetings or at social functions and have had to excuse myself to have a good cry. -- STILL SUFFERING IN KENTUCKY

DEAR ABBY: Please let "Losing Slowly" know she has another option to continue her new, healthy lifestyle in a safe environment. I have worked in malls for years, and they have all had a mall walkers' club.

The mall allows people in to walk, including many seniors, before it opens in the morning. There she will have access to a place where everyone is on the same page. The walkers are safe from traffic, the climate, and morons who have the manners of a junkyard dog. The regulars there can tell her how many miles they can cover. It's a great society of people who support and root for each other. -- NEVER GIVING UP IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

DEAR ABBY: I would suggest the two ladies create T-shirts that read "At Least We're Trying!" and watch the jeers turn into cheers. -- CAROL IN WISCONSIN

DEAR ABBY: I applaud her effort and your response, but may I raise the issue of people like myself who are ridiculed about being too thin? Strangers say things like "Eat something, or the wind will blow you away!" Please remind your readers that making fun of very thin people is just as hurtful as doing it to overweight individuals. -- WISP OF A WOMAN IN THE WEST

DEAR ABBY: My son is a tall, strikingly handsome teenager, although somewhat shy. Our problem is that his looks attract the wrong kind of attention from aggressive girls, and it's getting worse every year.

He and his 14-year-old sister went out to eat after school yesterday, and when they returned it was obvious my son was upset and his sister was furious. She said a group of college girls at a table next to them were teasing and taunting my son with blatantly sexual propositions. They went so far as to touch him suggestively as they got up to leave.

I'm sure they got the physical response from him they wanted; he is only 17, after all. But he was clearly angry, embarrassed and ashamed. He said he felt trapped and didn't know what to do.

The sexual harassment of young men is often laughed off with a wink and a nudge, but it isn't funny. It can be as painful and damaging to men as to women. Furthermore, my son is a minor, and I suspect the college girls were adults, if the beer on the table was any indication.

I am trying to raise my son to respect women and to be a decent man, husband and father someday, but frankly, I'm at a loss as to how to help him handle this type of sexual aggressiveness from girls. Do you or any of your readers have any suggestions? -- SHOCKED MOM IN TENNESSEE

DEAR MOM: I can see why your son and daughter were upset. He was not only sexually harassed by those young women, but when they put their hands on him, he was assaulted. When the teasing escalated, he and his sister should have changed tables or left the restaurant.

If your son's father is in the picture, he should discuss the incident with your son. If that's not possible, another adult male should help him understand that his arousal was normal and nothing to be ashamed of. I am sure my male readers will also want to weigh in on your letter because what happened to your son was outrageous.

DEAR ABBY: I recently bought a used car for myself. It is exotic, and my wife and I really like it. She's upset with me, however, because I won't let her drive it unless I'm in the car. I bought it with the intent for us to enjoy it, but I am also concerned with keeping it in good shape.

Because my wife is unhappy, I am undecided about whether to keep the car and stick to my guns, or sell it and live life simply and unfettered. We share everything, but the car is one thing that needs careful attention. Can you give me some advice? -- DOESN'T WANT IT DENTED IN RANCHO CORDOVA, CALIF.

DEAR DOESN'T WANT IT DENTED: Let's be honest. On one hand, you say you bought the car for yourself, and on the other, you say you bought it for both of you to enjoy. You can't have it both ways, so which is it?

I think the time has come to confess to your wife that even though you said the car was for both of you, it's really your baby. Then make it up to her by buying her that special something she has always wished for.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 18 years to a man I have a good relationship with. My problem is he has always been extremely rude to my parents. They aren't critical or judgmental of him, and they try hard to be friendly and accommodating, perhaps thinking it might lessen the rudeness he continually shows them.

Example: If my mom asks him how his parents are doing, without looking up from his cellphone he'll grunt and say, "They're fine" -- nothing more. When we go out to dinner, he usually doesn't join in the conversation. Instead, he just sits there with a dismissive, bored look on his face.

I have told him I don't want him to come with me when I visit them. It only takes a few times before he asks if he can come again and promises to try to behave. But after a few visits, he reverts back to his old, rude ways. It has reached a point that it's affecting our marriage. Can you offer any suggestions for how this issue can be resolved? -- TIRED OF IT IN TORONTO

DEAR TIRED OF IT: It would be helpful to know why your husband behaves this way. Does he dislike your folks? Does he have so little in common with them he doesn't know how to participate in a conversation with them? Is he this way with any other people?

Perhaps it would be better for all concerned if he saw them with you less often, say, 30 percent to 50 percent of the time. And before he does, make sure he is up to the task of being social because, as it stands, I agree his behavior is rude.

He's not a teenager with his nose buried in a cellphone; he's an adult who should know better. If he finds your parents' company less than stimulating, he should be a better actor.

DEAR ABBY: Last year my darling mother lost her battle with cancer. Aside from grief and loss, a bigger issue looms over my life. It concerns my stepdad.

Before Mom was diagnosed, my stepfather was a selfish, self-centered man. At times he was mean to her to the point that I wanted her to leave him. In fairness, once Mom was diagnosed, he stepped up to the plate and took excellent care of her until her death.

I have other issues with my stepfather. He was inappropriate with me, sharing things he should have kept to himself. It caused my mother great heartache and made me lose respect for him. I am still uncomfortable around him. Mom knew how I felt and understood.

Now that she is gone, do I have any obligation to him? He has a strained relationship with his only child. My sibling thinks I'm too hard on him, but doesn't understand the major problems our stepdad caused. I don't want to continue pretending I like him. Please help, Abby. -- SEARCHING FOR GUIDANCE

DEAR SEARCHING: You are entitled to your feelings and, no, you do not have any obligation to your stepfather. If your sibling wants to see him, that's his/her choice. Explain to your sibling your reasons for feeling the way you do -- and if you encounter your stepfather during family gatherings, be polite and don't linger. That isn't pretending to like the man; it is good manners.