life

New Stepmother Loves to Bait LW

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 19th, 2021

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My new stepmother is never wrong according to my father. Could it be she’s nearly 15 years younger? I swear she lives to bait me, and whenever I call her out in my father’s hearing, she comes up with an, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I honestly didn’t mean to upset you.” And my dad falls for it every time.

Her latest thing is telling me every time I stop in how slutty my girlfriend is. She’s only met her three times, and it was a quick meet each time, but she is convinced my girlfriend is only after me because my dad has some money. That has nothing to do with me. I earn my own money, live on my own, and never ask for anything from either him or my stepmonster.

Is it worth having a heart-to-heart with my dad to let him know what a b___h he married? --- CAN’T STAND THE WOMAN

DEAR CAN’T STAND THE WOMAN: Like it or not — and clearly you don’t — this woman is your father’s choice, and sharing your opinion of her might only drive a wedge between you and your dad. So long as she makes him happy and does him no harm, get used to the idea you’ll just have to put up with her.

To avoid being around your stepmother too much, you might consider working in time with your dad when she isn’t in the picture. Let him know how much the one-on-one time means to you.

Most certainly, I also think you need to stick up for your girlfriend. Whenever possible limit her exposure to your stepmother. Knowing that badmouthing someone special in your life upsets you only gives her more ammunition to get under your skin.

Love & DatingFamily & Parenting
life

Grandma's Make-over Confuses Granddaughter

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 15th, 2021

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandmother just turned 63. She and my grandfather have been divorced since I was in middle school, and now, all of a sudden my grandmother has decided to do some kind of make-over of her hair, the way she wears makeup, and even her clothes. I not only don’t get it, but I think she’s getting weird or something. She has always dressed like what I think a grandmother should dress like, but now she dresses like she thinks she’s in her 20s or 30s and her long hair has gone short and blonde.

I talked to my mother about this, and she just said Grandma needed to make some changes and that she thinks it’s great she is taking care of herself and thinking about her appearance. She said that she thought there might be a new man in Grandma’s life, and that she was waiting to hear about him from Grandma.

I think my grandmother has gone too far in this and I want to tell her so, but my mother told me to keep my mouth shut. Do you agree? --- GRANDMA’S ONLY SANE FAMILY MEMBER

DEAR GRANDMA’S ONLY SANE FAMILY MEMBER: I’m strongly with your mom on this.

Just as you like to decide how you present yourself to the world, so does your grandmother. It’s entirely possible that what you think of as a radical makeover is simply a redo of a look she felt worked for her in her younger days.

Bottom line, if it makes her feel good about herself, more power to her.

AgingFamily & Parenting
life

Parent Frustrated by Daughter's Lack of Ambition

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 14th, 2021

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My daughter was laid off last spring when the movie theatre where she worked shut down. She was working fulltime there, so she was able to collect unemployment, which was helpful. Now, that may be running out and the theatre has no immediate plans to reopen, but other places in our area are starting to hire. The trouble is, she shows no interest in applying anywhere. Her father and I have been helping with her car payments, and she is still under my car insurance, but my income is also down, and it is becoming a stretch to cover her too.

I get that she is probably a little depressed, like so many others who have lost their jobs, but I also think the cure is to get busy.

How do I push her in the right direction when she keeps pushing back? --- NEEDS MOTIVATION

DEAR NEEDS MOTIVATION: Your daughter is indeed far from alone in finding herself demoralized by the events of the last year.

If her health insurance situation allows, perhaps she could get into individual or group therapy with other young people facing similar challenges.

I also agree with you that being busy is generally good medicine. If she isn’t emotionally up to fulltime work, and the unemployment benefits are running out, it might help if you strongly encourage her to take on useful work of any kind, to segue her back into a regular routine. If her movie theatre isn’t going to reopen, she might find at least parttime work with a different employer that is either getting back on track or replacing staff that couldn’t wait out a partial or total temporary shutdown.

Family & ParentingWork & SchoolMental Health

Next up: More trusted advice from...

  • Slurp to Your Health With This Nutrient-Rich Soup
  • Grilling to a 'T'
  • Never Too Many Tomatoes
  • How Do I End A Dying Friendship?
  • Should I Even TRY To Date While I’m In Grad School?
  • How Do I Navigate Dating With Social Anxiety?
  • The Older I Get, the More Invisible I Feel. Help!
  • My Grief Is Clouding My Thinking. Help!
  • Summer was a Bust. How Do I Face Fall?
UExpressLifeParentingHomePetsHealthAstrologyOdditiesA-Z
AboutContactSubmissionsTerms of ServicePrivacy Policy
©2023 Andrews McMeel Universal