life

Dad Fears Son Has Too Many Tats for His Own Good

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 22nd, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I have never complained out loud to my son about what he chooses to do to his body. He has had his ears, nose, and even, for a while, his tongue pierced. A couple years ago he started getting tattoos, which I used to think was kind of cool, but now he has so many, he can no longer cover them with a long-sleeved shirt and I worry about his employment potential. The piercings can be removed when he goes for interviews, but the vine tat that comes all the way up his neck and the vein traces on his hands can’t.

He graduates this May from college and he needs to get something that pays enough to support himself. He tells me it’s no longer a big deal to have tattoos, but I’m thinking he may be underestimating their effect. Am I worrying for nothing? --- DAD OF THE TATTOOED MAN

DEAR DAD OF THE TATTOOED MAN: You might be, or, you might not. Given how ubiquitous body art has become, your son may not have a difficult time making a living because of his.

However, in spite of a quickly growing acceptance, some professions and fields (including military, law enforcement, legal or finance firms, healthcare, to name a few) still generally have restrictions against visible tattoos and certain piercings.

If your son’s looking at more conservative employers, suggest to him that, when possible, before an interview he should explore a company’s policy on tattoos and piercings to avoid any surprises.

life

Coworker Ex-Couple Hard to Deal With

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 17th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: The guy I share an office with just broke up with his long-term girlfriend, but the real problem is his ex works in the same department as us, and it wasn’t a pretty break-up. I know it hasn’t been easy for either of them, but it’s getting pretty bad for the rest of us to be around these two. They never miss a chance to get in a shot at each other, publicly and privately. Should we go to the boss with this, or just ignore it and hope it goes away? --- STAYING OUT OF IT

DEAR STAYING OUT OF IT: Maybe it’s time for an in-office intervention. Your officemate and his ex need to know that the rest of the department doesn’t care to be in their private no man’s land. If you believe getting your boss involved will help drive the point home, then go for it. If on the other hand it could lead to more trouble for the exs, I don’t see any reason to pull him or her into the fray.

life

Cheating Dad Riles Son

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | January 16th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: It wouldn’t be the first time, but I just found out my father is cheating on my mom again, and I know she knows, but doesn’t want to say anything to me because she also knows I’ll beat the s___t out of him. The last time he did this I was just a kid and all I knew was that my dad was acting weird and my mom was really sad. How long do I play dumb and let him walk all over her? --- PROTECTIVE SON

DEAR PROTECTIVE SON: The bigger question is how long does your mom put up with your dad’s actions?

Crappy as the situation is, this is between your parents, and hard as it is for you to stand by, that’s what you need to do for your mom’s sake. It may make you feel better to take it out of your dad’s hide, but a fight between her husband and son isn’t going to make things any better for your mother.

Let her know you’re there for her, both for now and throughout whatever comes next.

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