life

Holiday Spending Limits Are One-sided

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | December 19th, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Every year my wife and I agree to not spend more than $100 on each other for Christmas, and instead put some money towards something we need for the house our maybe a better vacation.

Last year, like she has done for the other of the six years we have been married, my wife went overboard and spent way more than what we agreed on. Her overspending makes me angry because we could use that money for something we both could enjoy, and it makes me look like a cheapskate. What can I do to make her keep in budget? --- FRUGAL, NOT CHEAP

DEAR FRUGAL, NOT CHEAP: I don’t think staying within an agreed upon budget makes you a cheapskate. But you need to make it clear to your wife that that’s how her ignoring the limit makes you feel.

It might help if you can more specifically focus her spending. Set up a savings account for a particular home improvement or designated dream vacation and let her know her best gift to you would be to make that fund grow so you can both enjoy her generosity.

life

To Go or Not to Go When It’s the Ex's Wedding

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | December 18th, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My husband and I split up four years ago after a very short marriage. We were together in high school and since neither of us was planning on going to college, we decided to get a start on life right after graduating. It was a pretty amicable divorce, and we still run into each other from time to time.

Last week I received an invitation to his upcoming wedding. I’m happy he has found someone, but I feel awkward about attending his wedding. It isn’t like we have stayed close, even though our families stay in touch. Do I go or not? --- THE EX WITH THE INVITE

DEAR EX WITH THE INVITE: Since the couple extended the invitation, I’m guessing the awkwardness is all on your part. If you can’t see it being a comfortable situation for yourself, then you’re probably better sending your apologies and maybe a gift as a proof you really do wish your ex well.

life

Nasty Client Hard to Deal With

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | December 13th, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I work at a temp-to-hire placement agency. Most of my clients are easy to work with, but there is one man who, no matter how much I bend over backwards to get him placed, he either is a no-show or lasts a day or two. That sometimes happens with other clients, but what makes it different with this man is that he blames me for everything that goes wrong.

No one else in the agency will take him on, and our boss has the philosophy that short of an ax murderer, we should be able to get at least temp work for everyone who walks in the door.

I don’t want to keep representing this man, because not only does he give me grief, but it doesn’t look good for the agency or me with the companies where I try to place him. I have to do something, but I’m afraid to approach my boss and don’t know what else to do. --- TIRED OF MR. NEGATIVE

DEAR TIRED OF MR. NEGATIVE: I’d imagine this is not a totally atypical situation for any employment agency, and if you’re going to stay in the field, you’re going to need to develop some tools for working with the less pleasant clients.

If you’re reluctant to talk to your boss, are there any more experienced coworkers you’re comfortable going to for advice? If not, you may be stuck going to the top. It sounds like this client is a known commodity. Even if your boss refuses to “fire” him, perhaps he/she can help guide you in what to do in his case.

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