DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I know it shouldn’t be a big deal, and I shouldn’t take it personally, but I have a friend who NEVER directly responds to texts or voicemails or snaps. I know she’s getting my messages, because she’ll reply immediately, but it’s almost guaranteed to be something completely off-topic. I’ve heard some of our other friends complaining about her doing this, especially when it messes up getting together. She insists she wasn’t told something about time or place and gets all pissy because she says I don’t tell her anything.

I like being with my friend, but I wonder if she’s really not getting what I’m trying to tell her or just trying to shove the blame on me when something goes wrong, even if I show her the texts we both sent. What can I do to get this woman on track? --- FRUSTRATED FRIEND

DEAR FRUSTRATED FRIEND: One thing you can try with a reliably unreliable responder is to keep it simple. Don’t cover more than one point per message, which makes it easier to piece a conversation back together, should the need arise.

The other thing you can do is to ask her, repeatedly if necessary, to confirm that she got the message.

Neither tactic is a guarantee, but maybe if she gets tired of being babysat and badgered, she’ll start getting the message ─ in more ways than one.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My girlfriend and I are travelling to spend Thanksgiving with her very large family. I like them, and I think they like me, but if the same thing happens this year as happened last year, I am going to be left behind with “the guys” while “the girls” all do their Black Friday thing immediately after we finish the big meal.

I have no problem spending time with her dad, brothers, and nephews, but I think it’s wrong to skip out on a family gathering to save an extra 20% at Target on Thanksgiving Day, and I’ve told my girlfriend that. Am I the crazy one here? --- ALL FOR KEEPING THANKSGIVING THANKSGIVING

DEAR ALL FOR KEEPING: I’m with you in your belief that Black Friday should stick to Friday, but it seems we’re in the minority.

Since you’ve already shared your thoughts with your girlfriend, and you’ll be her family’s guest, you pretty much need to go with the flow and follow their traditions, and enjoy the opportunity to get to know the other important men in your girlfriend’s life.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Even before our daughter was born, my wife was an early bird. I’ve always been a night owl. For years this has been a challenge for us, especially on weekends, when she’s up and ready to go way before I am, and she’s calling it a night when I’m just getting started.

Now that we have a kid it seems to be worse. Even when we get a sitter on a Saturday, we end up making it an early night because my wife loses steam by 10 or 11 p.m., when I’m just hitting my pace.

I don’t want to go out without her a lot, but I miss having a nightlife, and I know she’s sometimes frustrated because she has to wait around for me to be ready to get going on Saturdays and Sundays. What’s a good compromise? --- NIGHT OWL

DEAR NIGHT OWL: Since you’re both dedicated to your ends of the day, a little effort and compromise will be required to find common ground.

You might want to try switching off on doing things early in the day one weekend, and late at night the next.

Beyond that, there’s no reason you can’t enjoy separate, guilt-free peak hours the rest of the time. Your wife can relish a little early morning quiet (until it’s time to be Mommy), and you can get out with buddies who are more on your schedule.