DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband has taken to dyeing his hair black. Never mind he has had white hair for about 10 years. Going all the way to black looks pretty severe to me. When I have suggested he go for a softer color, he balked. He said it doesn’t matter if people knew him with white hair, and he is dyeing it himself. He lets it fade and colors it when he feels like it, so it’s kind of messy.
I want to figure out how to support him through this period, which kind of feels like a midlife crisis. If he’s going to do it, I think he should take it more seriously so he doesn’t look crazy. I suppose I should be happy he didn’t go out and buy a luxury car or something. Still, he looks kind of strange. How can I help him? -- Good Wife, Milwaukee
DEAR GOOD WIFE: Rather than complain about how sloppy or crazy you think your husband looks, offer to help him maintain his new look. If he is doing at-home dyeing, offer to be his colorist. Read the box and follow the directions. It can be a fun way for the two of you to bond. Once your husband gets comfortable with your help, you may be able to introduce a slight color change. Go to the store and study the different colors offered. Often the colors presented for men include touch-up brushes for mustaches and beards too.
Have fun with your husband during this time. He will appreciate your welcoming of his quirky idea to recapture a moment of youth. If you help him figure out a color and maintenance schedule that keeps him looking consistent, you may even get used to his new look.