Q: The counselor at our daughter's middle-school orientation surprised us by talking about college. She assumed kids would attend, even though plenty of college grads can't get work. Isn't middle school tough enough without the pressure of having teens think about college?

A: What's tough is getting to your senior year, ready to apply to college, and finding that you're unprepared -- that your grades won't get you the financial support you might have enjoyed, or that you're simply not ready for college work.

Granted, during the Great Recession some newly minted grads couldn't find work. That caused some to question the value of a college education. But that was a blip.

"There's a well-established 'wage premium' associated with college graduation," says Robert Pondiscio, a senior fellow at the Thomas B. Fordham Institute. "Over the long haul, there's no doubt about the value of a four-year degree."

The last several years of school-improvement efforts -- from No Child Left Behind to the Common Core State Standards -- have been about getting our nation's students "college- and career-ready," says Pondiscio.

"Most jobs today require high-level skills, and that almost always means education beyond high school," says Pondiscio. "Upward mobility correlates strongly with some manner of post-K-12 education, whether it's college, career and technical education (CTE) or some other credential. Raising standards is an attempt to position more kids -- not just those who go to college -- to take advantage of these increasingly essential opportunities."

Pondiscio says it's particularly important to help poor children see college as a goal. "For most low-income kids -- assuming they are adequately prepared in K-12 -- earning a college degree is an on-ramp to upward mobility."

Middle school isn't too early to chart a path to college, says Matt Frahm, the superintendent of the Naples (New York) Central School District.

"Educators in our district help students make the connection between doing well in school and being successful in life," he explains. "Preparing for a 40-plus-year career that is financially and psychologically rewarding is part of that success."

Some educators set college expectations in kindergarten. Jose Ruben Olivares, the principal of Think College Now (TCN), a public elementary school in Oakland, California, says it's never too early to open kids' eyes to the potential of college. TCN's walls have banners from nearly every college in the nation -- colorful daily reminders that encourage students to aspire to college. The curriculum emphasizes "college knowledge" -- setting goals, thinking about careers and developing study skills to get the grades required for acceptance.

Educators can help students set their sights on college, but parents play the most important role in getting a child beyond K-12.

A recent study by Keith Robinson, an assistant professor of sociology at the University of Texas at Austin, and Angel L. Harris, a professor of sociology at Duke University, looked at what kinds of "parental involvement" were most effective in boosting students' achievement. They found that the factor that made the most difference -- across all groups' studies -- was whether parents expected a child to attend college.

"If parents assume their children will pursue post-secondary education -- and talk about it with excitement and without pressure throughout their K-12 years -- then kids will begin to see college as part of their life's goals," says Frahm, the Naples superintendent.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: My son is a kindergartner. The school nurse called saying he had been tardy three days and absent four so far this year and asked if she could help make his attendance more regular. I'm a single working mom. The bus comes early and mornings are stressful. What's the big deal if a kindergartner misses a little school?

A: It's potentially a very big deal. The school nurse's outreach is the result of some sobering data. Kids who are frequently absent miss essential instruction and can quickly fall behind their peers.

Missing a lot of class time -- even in kindergarten -- can increase the risk of dropping out from high school. The school nurse is trying to help you nip a problem in the bud.

A longitudinal study of Rhode Island students shows that chronically absent kindergartners were twice as likely to be held back a year in elementary school. They lagged their peers on reading tests by 20 points and on math tests by 25 points in later elementary grades.

Another collaborative study by education nonprofits Attendance Works and the Healthy Schools Campaign estimates that 1 in 10 kindergartners misses at least 18 days of classes, or nearly a month of schooling, per year.

"Too many parents still think kindergarten is just play, but we teach early reading and math concepts," explains Marcie Johnson, a southern California kindergarten teacher. "Instruction is sequential. One day's learning builds on the previous day's. A child who misses one day can catch up. One who misses a week or more has a much harder time, and needs considerable support."

During September, Attendance Awareness Month, many schools reach out to parents to help them establish consistent patterns of attendance and to suggest logistical support and health services that can cut down on absences. (Some schools even enlist celebrities to do "wake up" calls to students.)

Attendance Works, which is a national and state initiative that promotes better policy and practice around school attendance, offers practical advice to parents:

-- Establish and stick to basic routines that will help children develop the habit of on-time attendance (going to bed early, waking up on time, being organized to get out the door).

-- Talk to your children about why going to school every day is critically important, unless they are sick. If your son seems reluctant to go to school, find out why and work with the teacher, administrator or after-school provider to get him excited about going.

-- Create back-up plans: Can you turn to another family member, a neighbor or a fellow parent to help you get your son to school if an emergency comes up?

-- Reach out to the school for help if you are experiencing tough times such as a transportation problem, loss of a job, unstable housing or health problems that make it difficult to get your son to school. Other parents as well as your son's teacher, principal, social worker, school nurse, after-school providers or community agencies can help you and connect you to needed resources.

-- If your son is absent, work with his teacher to make sure he has an opportunity to learn and make up for the academics he missed. For more ideas, go to attendanceworks.org and healthyschoolscampaign.org.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: Our district is adopting a new "social and emotional" skills program to improve classroom behavior. I agree that disruptive students are a problem, but with all the new stuff schools are loading on (e.g., STEM, Common Core), do kids really need one more thing?

A: Social and emotional leaning (SEL) is coming to many districts this fall. While the phrase may sound buzzy, SEL programs can not only help kids hone interpersonal skills and impulse control, they can boost students' academic success and improve their health.

Even teachers wary of adding more to the school day say SEL is a worthwhile addition because, if well taught, SEL cuts discipline problems and distractions. In a recent survey, more than 90 percent of teachers said they want schools to help kids develop their social skills and build good character.

Roger P. Weissberg, a University of Illinois at Chicago professor of psychology and education, is chief knowledge officer at the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (casel.org), a Chicago-based organization that works to bring SEL into schools. Weissberg and his colleagues have worked with many districts to integrate SEL into the school day.

"Each district has their model of integrating the program with other priorities, so it's not an add-on," he explains, "but a way to strengthen things they're already doing."

Weissberg and his colleagues reviewed the effectiveness of 213 school-based SEL learning programs reaching 270,000 students. Their research shows that the programs produce notable gains in kids' social skills, behavior and academics.

An effective SEL program teaches five core competencies that students learn to apply in daily interactions, says Weissberg.

-- Self-awareness: How to accurately assess one's feelings, interests, values and strengths.

-- Self-management: How to handle stress and express emotions effectively; control impulses; set and monitor progress toward goals.

-- Social awareness: How to see things from another's perspective; appreciate individual and group similarities and differences; recognize and use family, school and community resources.

-- Relationship skills: How to establish and maintain healthy relationships; resist inappropriate social pressure; prevent and resolve interpersonal conflict; seek help when needed.

-- Responsible decision-making: How to make rational decisions based on standards, safety concerns, social norms and respect for self and others; contribute to one's school and community.

All "emotional intelligence" begins at home, says Bill Jackson, the president and founder of GreatSchools, an education resource for parents. "Parents have a key role in teaching and reinforcing these skills."

Working with the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, GreatSchools created a set of tools called Emotional Smarts to "help parents help their children build character and shape valuable life skills," says Jackson.

The online tools include videos to help parents see issues like homework and sibling rivalry from their child's perspective; a game to help children understand and recognize emotions; and ways to explore "feeling words" in a fun way. For more information, go to ei.yale.edu or greatschools.org.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)