parenting

Summertime Sports Can Drain Kids, Parents

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | June 2nd, 2014

Q: Our boys, aged 12 and 10, are going to soccer camp this summer. The younger one is a good player. The older one hates it -- and while I can't show it, I do, too. It's expensive, time-consuming and takes the leisure out of summer. My husband wants the boys to become good players, so they can get athletic scholarships. What are the odds?

A: Not great. There are 7 million high school athletes, and spots on college rosters for just 2 percent of them. Of those, only 1 percent get a "full ride" scholarship, says Tiffin, Ohio, coach Seth Almekinder, who has taught in U.S. and international schools. "Many of those are worth less than the family's investment in getting kids to that level."

Less than 9 percent of boys who take part in high school soccer play college soccer at any level, says Almekinder: "Division III doesn't offer athletic scholarships, so those students pay to play unless they get academic scholarships." (Go to www.scholarshipstats.com/varsityodds.html.)

A more pressing issue is your son who hates soccer. "Don't force a child to participate in any non-required activity in which he or she isn't a willing participant," urges Almekinder. "I'm not advocating quitting a team midseason -- kids learn from seeing a commitment through. But that doesn't seem to be the case here.

"Summer should be fun and enriching. There are so many activities your older son might enjoy -- from robotics to museum classes to hiking. Find one. Your son will be happier and so will the family."

Three of four families with school-aged kids have at least one in an organized sport. "By age 15, as many as 80 percent of these youngsters have quit," says Massachusetts coach Jay Atkinson, referencing data from the Open Access Journal of Sports Medicine.

Almekinder says it's because most parents, whether coaching or cheering, don't understand the developmental levels of youth sport.

"The first is entry-level recreational," he says. "Participants are ages 4 to 10. The purpose is fun exposure to a sport. Everyone participates, and playing time is equal. Score can be kept, but winning and losing are secondary to participation. Coaching is focused on fundamental skills, not team tactics or strategy."

The second level is developmental. "Tactics and game strategy are added to skill development," notes Almekinder. "This stage corresponds to middle school through junior varsity, when travel teams begin."

The final level is competitive. "This is where winning and losing matter as an aspect of participation," Almekinder explains. "Players are selected based on ability and skill. The best play the most. This is sport at high school varsity, college and the pros. When parents or coaches pressure young athletes, allow poor sportsmanship, and make winning the goal, they lose sight of the developmental levels of sports and turn kids off."

Unstructured pick-up games in the backyard or alleyway add fun to vacation. "They bring kids together without oversight of adults," says Almekinder. "Before the rise of organized youth sports outside of school, that was what summer was for most kids -- playing with friends in the neighborhood. There's nothing wrong with that!"

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Different Tools Can Help Kids Learn Financial Literacy

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | May 26th, 2014

Q: This summer, I want to teach my daughter, a rising high school sophomore, to be a smarter saver, because she's not learning it at school and she now has a summer job. Where can I find resources?

A: You're smart to take this on. Only 17 states require a personal-finance course to graduate.

Yet financial illiteracy is a big threat facing our country, says certified public accountant John J. Vento, author of "Financial Independence" (Wiley, 2013): It's passed "from generation to generation, because parents often lack financial literacy, too."

Some teens learn money management themselves. A seventh-grader I know walks dogs, organizes closets and cleans refrigerators to meet a big goal: earn $4,000 by the time she's 16 to buy a car so she can commute to a "real" job. Is her older brother equally motivated? Not so much, says their mom: "She's from Planet Save-It. He was born on Planet Spend-It!"

Parents of teens from both planets can find good online resources to help kids develop money sense.

-- Don't just focus on saving; teach the basics of financial literacy. At a minimum, teens should be able to budget, save and spend wisely, according to Kelli Ramey, director of H&R Block's Dollars & Sense, offering links for parents and teens at www.hrblockdollarsandsense.com.

-- Schwab MoneyWise provides games and tips for teens that cover budgeting, saving, spending, investing and giving back. Go to www.schwabmoneywise.com.

-- Junior Achievement $AVE, USA offers downloadable resources on financial planning for parents and kids at juniorachievement.org. Check the website for Junior Achievement programs in your area.

-- Find quizzes on earning, saving, borrowing, protecting and spending money at Northwestern Mutual's The Mint. The site offers a compounding calculator that demonstrates the "magic" of compounded interest in various savings and investment vehicles. Go to www.themint.org.

Gail Karlitz, co-author of "Growing Money: A Complete Investing Guide for Kids" (Price Stern Sloan, 2010), defines financial literacy as "knowing how to earn money, manage it, invest it to earn more money, spend it and donate it to help others. While that may seem a tall order for the summer, it really isn't if you use your family as the example."

Karlitz encourages parents to get concrete: list the family's needs (food, clothes, housing); wants (treats, entertainment, things we love but aren't essential); goals (things we save for, such as a TV); and giving (charities, gifts, religious donations).

"Explain that, as parents, you're assuming the cost of the family's needs, such as mortgage payments, insurance, food and so on. Discuss what those expenses are," says Karlitz.

Have your daughter list her own needs, wants, saving and investing goals and ideas for giving. Discuss how she'll allocate her summer earnings into these buckets.

The financial planning website Jump$tart Coalition has a tool called "reality check" that makes this fun, says Karlitz: "Input amounts you spend into key expense categories to see the relationship between your spending and your income. This is an eye-opener!" Go to www.jumpstart.org/reality-check.

Before your daughter starts her job, have her set up a bank account so the paycheck is direct-deposited, says Karlitz: "Once it goes into her account, she's more likely to stick with her allocations."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Make Reading Fun for Kids During Summer Months

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | May 19th, 2014

Q: We just got the end-of-school-year advice to make sure our kids read over the summer. In years past, teachers sent home suggested books by grade level, but not this time. My two boys (ages 9 and 10) would play Minecraft all summer if we let them. Is it really important to make them read?

A: Use the word "entice," not "make." Summer reading shouldn't be a forced march. And yes, it's important that they read.

Like any skill, kids get better at reading the more they practice. Summer reading keeps kids' skills sharp. Research by the National Summer Learning Association shows that students who don't read when school is out lose ground, putting them behind when they return to class.

Summer reading should be pure pleasure, says Carl Harvey, library media specialist at North Elementary School in Noblesville, Indiana.

"Kids are more likely to want to read when they select their own books and magazines, and the format -- paper or digital," he says. "They are also more likely to read when parents enjoy some stories with them."

Here are some of the best ways to find reading materials for the lazy days of summer:

-- Check in with your school librarian. "They know current titles kids love," says Harvey. Some school libraries will lend books and digital devices over the summer.

-- Visit your public library often. "Libraries have special summer programming and events to attract young readers," Harvey adds. "Many display their new books and new authors. Check out a stack, enjoy what appeals and return the rest. Read and repeat throughout the summer."

-- Get hooked on an author or a series. If your boys like a book by one author, chances are that they'll like others. "Boys appreciate humor, fantasy and irreverence," says Jon Scieszka, author of several kids' books, including "The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs!" (Puffin, 1996) and "The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales" (Viking Juvenile, 1992). His website, www.guysread.com, lists titles of "books that guys have told us they like."

-- Connect with their passion. If they love Minecraft and video games, then mine that interest, urges Harvey: "Your librarian can recommend titles of books that appeal to gamers and extend their interests." You won't be the first mother to check out "Minecraft: Essential Handbook" (Scholastic Inc., 2013).

-- Load digital devices with e-books. While you're sitting in traffic, your 10-year-old can be flying through the first volume of "Star Wars: Dawn of the Jedi" (Dark Horse Comics, 2012) on your Kindle.

-- Stock up at garage sales. "You'll find great, inexpensive kids' books at tag sales," says Dallas reading expert Dr. Delores Seamster. Read, enjoy and pass on.

-- Subscribe to magazines. Kids look forward to getting magazines in the mail. "Our 10-year-old is a Minecrafter who devours Popular Science," says Chris Abraham, a New York parent. "His younger brother, a Yankee fan, loves Sports Illustrated for Kids. They open the magazines the minute they arrive."

-- Find suggestions at greatschools.org, which lists favorite books by grade levels K-5, and commonsensemedia.org, which reviews children's titles by age.

-- Make reading for pleasure a year-round goal. "Keep up the fun reading once school starts," says Harvey. "Your boys will learn that reading about what they love is a great way to wind down after a day of school."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

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