parenting

'Looping' Can Benefit Both Teacher and Student

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | January 20th, 2014

Q: We're looking at schools to enroll our 5-year-old in kindergarten. One school we like "loops" students. The kids have the same teacher for two years. The school has good test scores and a high GreatSchools rating. What are the downsides?

A: When looping works, there's a lot to love. Also known as teacher rotation, two-cycle teaching or multiyear placement, looping moves a teacher along with his or her class to the next grade for a year or more.

Looping isn't widespread, but research shows benefits: Instructional time is saved during the second year because the teacher doesn't have to learn each child's personality and proficiencies. Kids already know the teacher's rules and style. Parents understand the expectations.

"The first day back at school is really the 181st day of school for a multiyear class. You get right down to business," says Pam Bierly, a respected Oregon educator who "looped" with students for much of her career.

Bierly explains why looping can help kids come out ahead.

One, teachers get to use their knowledge of each child over a longer period. "It takes months to learn enough about students to get the best from them," Bierly says. "To know their family, friends, how much they can be pushed, when to say, 'Please sit down' because they're not really sick, and when to send them to the nurse."

Two, teacher, students and parents build stronger relationships. "Parents are often more engaged the second year," says Bierly, "and you use what you know to accelerate kids' learning. At the start of the second year, I could tell Jennifer, 'Your mom expects more.'"

Three, you give kids the gift of time. "Looping is a godsend for late boomers and shy kids," says Bierly. "It takes time for children to trust their teachers and not be afraid to make mistakes, take chances, ask for help. This is especially true for at-risk kids with rocky home lives."

Four, it provides flexibility. Teachers can make decisions knowing they can reteach a concept the following year. "You already know you can give Bradley a needed refresher on his math facts," says Bierly.

Parents typically have three worries about looping, says Bierly. What if there's a teacher/child conflict? What if the class is packed with special-needs kids? What if there is a bad teacher?

"Principals handle personality conflicts the same way they would in a traditional model, by changing a child's class placement," says Bierly. As for class composition, she says, "All principals or teacher committees take special care to create classes that aren't overloaded with too many challenging students."

As for poor teachers, there's evidence that educators who volunteer to teach in looped classrooms are often among the district's top performers. They like a challenge and the benefits to kids. "It would be horrible if a class were stuck with a bad teacher for two years, but with new teacher rating systems and more poor teachers being counseled out, principals and parents have an obligation to make sure that doesn't happen," says Bierly.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Teach Daughter Respect by Showing Her Respect

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | January 13th, 2014

Q: Over the holidays, my sister shocked me by saying, "Your daughter doesn't show respect because you don't respect her." It's hard when she and her friends are snarky and so into themselves. How do you teach a fifth-grader respect?

A: By modeling respect daily, says Dr. Jane Bluestein, a New Mexico educator and parenting coach.

"A respectful person practices the golden rule: treating others as they wish to be treated," she says.

Bluestein says that while it's important to teach the concept of respect, your sister has a point.

"Kids learn respect when we show them what it looks like," she says.

If your daughter behaves in a way that feels disrespectful, set a boundary and ask for the behavior you want instead, Bluestein advises.

"Saying 'Let's continue this conversation when you are willing to do so without yelling' is far more instructive than labeling the behavior as disrespectful," she says.

Bluestein, author of "The Parent's Little Book of Lists: Do's and Don'ts of Effective Parenting" (Health Communications Inc., 1997), suggests the following strategies:

-- Use language, words and tone of voice that would be acceptable to you if your daughter were speaking to you.

-- Model "please" and "thank you." If someone says, "Thank you," say, "You're welcome." Don't say, "Hey, no problem!"

-- Make eye contact when your daughter is talking to you. Listen. Make an effort to really hear and appreciate what she is saying.

-- Value her need for privacy. Knock before entering her room. Don't open her mail or email; don't listen in on her phone conversations; don't hover on her social media accounts. (Exceptions are prior agreements in which your daughter knows her communications might be monitored or instances in which her safety might be threatened.)

-- Give your daughter space to have different opinions and preferences than you or other family members.

-- Ask your daughter before using or borrowing something of hers.

-- Respect her need for competence and autonomy. Help her explore options and potential outcomes, rather than solving her problems. If your daughter is struggling with something and is in no danger of getting hurt, hurting anyone or ruining something valuable, ask her if she wants help before you step in to fix the problem.

-- Allow her to respond to situations differently than you would without criticizing, shaming or ridiculing her.

-- Call her what she wishes to be called. Resist names or nicknames that embarrass her or that she feels she has outgrown.

-- Introduce your daughter when you encounter someone who hasn't met her. When you meet a grown-up friend with a child along, say hello to the child as well as the adult.

-- If you witness her or her peers behaving disrespectfully to others, give them a reminder by saying, "We don't use those words." Or you might say, "Let's try this again without the attitude." This gives her important feedback.

Respect is one of the six pillars (along with trustworthiness, responsibility, fairness, caring and citizenship) of the popular "Character Counts" program adopted by many schools and youth organizations. To find who's using it in your community, go to charactercounts.org.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Model Good Coversation Skills for Teen Daughter

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | January 6th, 2014

Q: My 13-year-old daughter can't hold a conversation. She and her friends text each other -- even while together! I want her to talk with family and friends. She's not shy; she just comes off as detached. How can I teach her the art of conversation?

A: "Knowing how to have a meaningful conversation is an important life skill," says Dr. Allen Mendler, a nationally respected expert on motivating learners and the author of "When Teaching Gets Tough" (ASCD, 2012). "Parents should take an active role in developing kids' oral language skills. Your daughter may moan and groan, but don't give up."

Mendler suggests the following strategies:

-- Model good conversation. Conversation is a volley of thoughts and opinions that help us get to know, appreciate and respect one another. You model conversation by exchanging views, not by checking your email when your spouse asks your opinion.

To practice, "Try one- to two-minute interactions, one-on-one, a few times each week with your daughter unrelated to behavior, tasks or homework," suggests Mendler. "Share something about yourself she might not know, or ask her opinion on a topic. Use responses or prompts that enhance conversation, such as, 'Really? Tell me more. Why do you think that happened? No kidding!'"

-- Set aside "no electronics" family time. Schedule a distraction-free environment with turned-off phones, such as a regular family mealtime. "Ask everyone to share something about the day -- a highlight, problem, something they learned, something fun or a way they made somebody's life better," says Mendler. "If there is initial silence, wait 15 seconds and then share something about yourself. Model good listening by summarizing what each person said. Eventually, expect other family members to do this."

-- Challenge her. If she and her friends hang out without interacting, bet them five dollars they can't have a conversation for five minutes. "Tell them a conversation means you talk and then ask a question that shows you might be interested in what someone has to say," says Mendler. "Teach them the SLANTS rule: Smile. Listen. Answer or ask questions. Nod to show interest. Track the speaker. Share something back."

If no one begins, you start. For example, say, "What can we do that's fun but doesn't cost a lot?" and talk for one minute. End by saying, "So those are things I like to do that are inexpensive. What are some things you like to do?"

Another twist is to bring up what 13-year-old girls are interested in -- such as boys, music or fashion -- then pretend you are clueless: "I don't get it. A hundred years ago, when I was 13, I couldn't stop talking to friends about boys and our favorite music. All you girls do is fiddle with your phones. What am I missing? Just out of curiosity, who's the cutest guy at school? Who's the smartest? Why?"

If nobody engages, talk about guys you knew when you were 13. When your daughter expresses horror ("Oh, Mom!") that you once thought a guy was cute, you'll have started a good conversation!

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

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