Q: My daughter is a single working mom with a 3-year-old son. I think he should enter preschool. She wants him home with me even though I'm sickly. She says a child's IQ is what it is and preschool isn't beneficial. She's making me feel guilty. Is it true that IQ is fixed at birth?

A: Overwhelmingly, experts agree that intelligence is not fixed at birth.

As for the benefits of preschool, there is considerable evidence showing positive, long-lasting effects for 3- and 4-year-olds enrolled in early learning programs.

Studies also show that while kids from lower socioeconomic groups may have lower IQs than their better-off counterparts, the gap is due to differences in educational opportunities. Their IQs rise as their learning opportunities expand.

Researchers have also shown that children who have had preschool are more ready for kindergarten. They tend to repeat fewer grades, have higher rates of high school graduation, and exhibit more pro-social behavior throughout their school years.

But quality matters. If the educational program is just baby-sitting, your grandson could be better off with you, assuming you're not giving him a daily diet of TV. But if the program has well-trained teachers, is organized around environments where teachers and children interact, and offers developmentally appropriate activities to help him build a strong foundation for kindergarten, then encourage your daughter to register him.

Your daughter may be interested in a recently published paper by New York University researchers Joshua Aronson, Clancy Blair and John Protzko at the NYU Steinhardt School of Culture, Education, and Human Development. They analyzed hundreds of studies to determine the overall effectiveness of various early childhood interventions involving children from birth through kindergarten.

The researchers discovered that enrolling an economically disadvantaged child in an early education program could raise his or her IQ by more than four points. Preschools that include a language development component boosted children's IQ by more than seven points.

They also found that a technique called interactive or shared reading -- when parents actively engage their children while reading with them -- raised children's IQ by more than six points.

The technique helps children develop vocabulary, knowledge of the sounds of language, and a habit of home reading, says early literacy expert Anne Van Kleeck, author of "Sharing Books and Stories to Promote Language and Literacy" (Plural Publishing, 2006). She suggests these basic steps when reading with your preschooler:

Look for children's books that engage him. Ask him simple questions, such as, "What is in this picture?" Repeat words and phrases. Ask him to label objects and events in sequence. As you progress through a book, ask him more complex questions about specific things in the story. Ask open-ended questions, rather than yes or no questions, and expand on his explanations. If he says, "The boy is afraid," ask him why. Reinforce correct grammar and syntax. If your grandson says, "The dog go home," say, "Yes, the dog went home."

To give your grandson a great start, enroll him in a quality preschool program and read with him every day after school. You'll put him on a path to lifelong learning.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: My son's second-grade teacher wants me to bring our dog Bella to class to "listen" to students read. Bella, a tranquil 8-year-old Labrador retriever, is a trained guide dog whose owner died recently. The teacher says Bella can help some kids read better. The principal has approved, and my son is excited. Is this a crazy idea?

A: No, not at all. The folks at Intermountain Therapy Animals have certified Reading Education Assistance Dogs (R.E.A.D) and their owners throughout the nation for more than a decade. R.E.A.D. dogs are registered therapy animals that volunteer with their owners or handlers as a team. They work in schools, libraries and other settings as reading companions for children. The research results show gains for many young readers.

R.E.A.D teaches the dogs to look at the book while a child is reading it, focus on the reader and tune out classroom distractions. To learn more about the training and guidelines, go to therapyanimals.org/R.E.A.D.html.

You wouldn't want to take a dog like Marley from "Marley & Me" to class, but many schools welcome pets that are certified as "Good Citizens" by organizations such as R.E.A.D. and Pet Partners (petpartners.org) and their local affiliates.

Because Bella is a trained guide dog and comfortable in social settings, she will probably fit right in the classroom and have no problem listening patiently as a child plows his way through "Captain Underpants."

Double-check with your principal to make sure that there are no children with serious allergies whom Bella might encounter. You'll have to provide a certificate from a veterinarian that Bella is in good health and has had required vaccinations. Also, inquire about insurance. (Some training organizations offer it to owners of certified dogs.) Work with the teacher to set a specified time that Bella will be with students, and remain with her during this time.

"I can totally understand why this teacher would want Bella to listen to second-graders," says Kristen Ball, a Connecticut fifth-grade teacher who often takes her Tibetan terrier, Livvy, to class. "The elementary school years are critically important in the lives of young readers. They need lots of practice to become fluent readers, yet many are still nervous when reading aloud to peers and adults.

"Dogs relax kids. They just start reading and don't worry about making a mistake. Plus, reading to a dog is fun! Even my fifth-graders become more animated and confident because they know the dog won't care if they stumble over a word."

Ball said that Livvy helps kids with high energy because they can pet her throughout the day. During one school year in particular, Livvy gave a daily boost to a boy in Ball's class who had a serious medical condition.

Ball has noticed something else dogs can do for kids: help them focus.

"Some students are very distractible, but when Livvy is relaxing at their feet, they focus on their tasks better," she says. "There is something magical about a dog's presence that calms kids and makes them very happy."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: My son is failing ninth grade. For years, I've reminded him to do his homework, and then checked with his teachers. When I back off, he slacks off. His teachers say he can still pass if he shows effort. He admits he's lazy. I've grounded him and removed digital devices, but it's always the same old pattern. So I'm going to let him make the decision to fail. Am I doing the right thing?

A: This is tough. I gather that you've worked with his teachers to rule out learning disabilities and determined that he isn't an under-challenged student who needs acceleration. And I assume you've checked to make sure that he has mastered the necessary skills for high school work.

"Assuming you've pulled out all the stops -- consulted with teachers and counselors and they're as perplexed as you -- I suggest one more thing: Let's call it the positive consequences system," advises says Jane Bluestein, Ph.D., a New Mexico educator who coaches teachers and parents on student behavior.

This works by replacing threats ("If you don't do your homework, you're grounded!") with positively framed statements ("When you have completed your math homework, you can shoot baskets with your friends for a half-hour," or, "You're almost finished with your report? Great, finish it, then you can have your phone back.").

You're still tying privileges to responsibilities, but you're switching the dynamic, says Bluestein, author of "Parents, Teens and Boundaries" (HCI, 1993).

"Threats provoke resistance, passive-aggressiveness and flat-out defiance," she says. "Emphasizing positive consequences helps avoid negative reactions, and it puts all the responsibility back on your son."

For this to work, de-stress his after-school time. Make it friendly, neutral and nonconfrontational.

"Kids need a transition after school," says Bluestein, "and many teachers give more homework than is reasonable. Without babying him, be sympathetic. Some students can start homework once they've had a snack; others need a longer break.

"Since scheduling is a skill he needs to develop, give him a chunk of time and ask him to allocate blocks of time within it that he'll need to finish each assignment. Weave meaningful positive outcomes into his schedule if he meets his goals."

What if this doesn't work? Parental encouragement and engagement are just two factors in school success and you've given those a good shot, says Bluestein.

"Kids learn much from the outcomes of the choices they make," she says. "I can't think of many things harder than watching a child 'choose' to fail, but ultimately, despite your best efforts, he may be fighting you for power and this is his way to prove you can't control him. If it's a power play, you may want to seek the help of a family counselor to learn how to break destructive win-lose (or no-win) patterns."

Have a very frank discussion with him about the consequences of failure.

"Ask him how he will feel and what he'll do if he finds himself next year sitting in the same classes again," Bluestein advises. "In the same discussion, be very clear about which privileges come with improvement and success."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)