The Lucerne University of Applied Sciences and Arts in Switzerland has a new course of study for scholars to pursue: a bachelor's or master's in yodeling. Beginning in the 2018-19 academic year, students will be able to major in the traditional form of singing, which was used by Swiss herdsmen to communicate with each other in the mountains. The BBC reported that prize-winning yodeler Nadja Rass will lead the courses, which will also include musical theory and history. "We have long dreamed of offering yodeling at the university," gushed Michael Kaufmann, head of the school's music department. [BBC, 1/30/18]

Names in the News

Police in Logansport, Indiana, finally caught up with the thief who had been targeting churches in the area since Jan. 16: Christian J. Alter, 22, of Kewanna, was charged with breaking into five houses of worship and stealing cash, according to the Logansport Pharos-Tribune. Alter was apprehended Jan. 23 just moments before the fifth burglary, at Rehoboth Christian Church, was discovered by police. He was being held in the Cass County Jail. [Pharos-Tribune, 1/24/2018]

The Continuing Crisis

Birds nesting near natural gas compressors have been found to suffer symptoms similar to PTSD in humans, according to researchers at the Florida Museum of Natural History, and noise pollution has been named the culprit. The Washington Post reported the team studied birds in the Rattlesnake Canyon Habitat Management Area in New Mexico, which is uninhabited by humans but does contain natural gas wells and compression stations that constantly emit a low-frequency hum. The steady noise was linked to abnormal levels of stress hormones, and the usually hardy western bluebirds in the area were found to be smaller and displayed bedraggled feathers. "The body is just starting to break down," explained stress physiologist Christopher Lowry. [The Washington Post, 1/9/2018]

Armed and Naked

In Texas, game wardens came across an arresting sight in Gregg County last November: an unnamed Upshur County man hunting in the nude along a state highway. The Houston Chronicle reported that the hunter, who is a well-known nudist and activist in the area, contested his arrest on charges including hunting without a license, but one look in court at the warden's body cam footage undermined his case. The man then dropped his appeals and settled the citations. [Houston Chronicle, 11/22/2017]

You Have the Right to Remain Silent

Vincente Rodrigues-Ortiz, 22, was arrested on Jan. 24 in Grand Rapids, Michigan, for the assault and murder of Andre Hawkins, 17, the day before. But when Rodrigues-Ortiz appeared in court on Jan. 25 for arraignment, he questioned the judge about his "other murder case." WWMT TV reported that his query led prosecutors to interview and then swiftly charge him with the March 2017 homicide of Laurie Kay Lundeburg, and Rodrigues-Ortiz now awaits arraignment in that case as well. [WWMT TV, 1/25/2018]

Brutally Honest

Kane Blake of Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada, has great things to say about his Springvalley home: "It's a gorgeous neighborhood," and his family loves most things about it. Nevertheless, the Blakes have listed their home for sale, with a sign out front reading: "Home for Sale by owner because neighbor is an ---hole." Blake said a neighbor has been harassing his family for five years, including sending police and bylaws officers to the house for frivolous reasons and taking photos of Blake's house. "My kids won't even walk to school, they're terrified," he told the Kelowna Capital News, adding that he's received several offers on his house. (Update: Kane has since removed the sign.) [Kelowna Capital News, 1/27/2018]

Toilet Ghost

Homeowners in Noosa, Queensland, Australia, were perplexed about why their toilet kept randomly flushing, so on Jan. 28, they looked into the flush mechanism embedded in the wall behind the toilet. Then they summoned Luke Huntley, a local snake catcher. Huntley found a 13-foot brown tree snake in the niche, according to the Daily Mail, resting on the flush mechanism. "Hopefully, he's going to be able to come straight out," Huntley said on a video of the capture, "but he's a little grumpy." [Daily Mail, 1/28/2018]

Bright Idea

A landlord in Cardiff, Wales, was caught in a compromising position when he offered a special rent deal to an ITV Wales reporter with a hidden camera. The unnamed man posted an ad on Craigslist offering a 650-pound-per-month home with the option of a "reduced deposit/rent arrangement" for "alternative payments." When he met reporter Sian Thomas at a restaurant to discuss the property, he said, "I don't know if you have heard of a sort of 'friends with benefits' sort of arrangement," reported Metro News on Jan. 30. He went on to say that if a once-a-week sex arrangement could be struck, "then I wouldn't be interested in any rent from you at all." The ITV Wales report was part of an investigation into "sex for rent" arrangements, which apparently are not uncommon in Wales, judging from other advertisements. [Metro News, 1/30/2018]

Government in Action

-- Saugatuck, Michigan, attorney Michael Haddock's dog, Ryder, probably gave the mail carrier a day off after receiving an unexpected letter on Jan. 27 from the State of Michigan Unemployment Insurance Agency. According to WZZM TV, Haddock opened the envelope addressed to Ryder and found a letter saying that Ryder is eligible for $360 per week in unemployment benefits. "I knew he was clever," Haddock said of Ryder, "but he surprised me this time." The UIA admitted that its computer did send the notice to Ryder, but it was later flagged as suspicious, and the German shepherd won't receive any benefits after all. [WZZM, 1/31/2018]

-- In New Hampshire, the state legislature is considering a bill that would hold owners of poultry responsible for the birds' trespassing. According to the proposal, reported by the Associated Press, "anyone who knowingly, recklessly or negligently allows their domestic fowl to enter someone else's property without permission" can be convicted if the birds damage crops or property. Rep. Michael Moffett, a Loudon Republican, told a committee on Jan. 30 that one man told him his neighbor was using chickens as a "form of harassment and provocation." But Earl Tuson, a local vegetable farmer, opposed the bill, noting, "Everyone loves eating bacon until they move in next to the pig farm." [Associated Press, 1/30/2018]

Smooth Reaction

A Missouri State University freshman identified only as Hayden may have set the perfect stage for a romantic story he'll tell into old age. In January, as he trolled Tinder, he spotted Claudia, also a student at MSU in Springfield. But, as the Springfield News-Leader reported, Hayden accidentally swiped left, rejecting her, so he decided on a bold move to find her. On Jan. 20, he searched the MSU website for every person named Claudia and emailed them all, asking "the" Claudia to email him back. He offered a doughnut date for "the one that got away." Claudia Alley, a freshman from Jefferson City, got Hayden's email and knew she was his target because he referenced a joke she made in her Tinder bio. Alley emailed Hayden, and the two planned to get doughnuts -- and perhaps make history -- later that week. [Springfield News-Leader, 1/20/2018]

Awesome!

Rookie metal detectors Andy Sampson and Paul Adams were out looking for treasure along the Suffolk/Essex border in England when they came across more than 50 gold coins and pottery. Sampson said Adams started "shouting and jumping around and dancing." As for himself, Sampson immediately started figuring out how he would spend the money, which the pair thought might amount to 250,000 pounds or more. Alas, when Sampson showed the coins to his neighbor, he said, "They're not real -- there's something wrong with them." Sure enough, when the treasure hunters made inquiries, they found that the coins and pottery were props for a BBC TV show, "Detectorists." Sampson and Adams told the BBC on Jan. 31 that they have "got over" their huge disappointment and will continue to metal detect. [BBC, 1/31/2018]

In Turkmenistan's capital, Ashgabat, drivers of black cars are facing high costs to repaint their cars white or silver after President Gurbanguly Berdymukhammedov banned black vehicles because he thinks the color white brings good luck. Police began seizing dark-colored vehicles in late December, and owners have to apply for permission to repaint and re-register them. The average wage in Ashgabat is about $300 a month (or 1,200 manats); one Turkman told Radio Free Europe that he was quoted 7,000 manats for a paint job, but was told that the price would rise within a week to 11,000 manats. "Even if I don't spend any money anywhere, I will be forced to hand over pretty much my entire annual salary just to repaint," the unnamed man said, adding that his black car had already been impounded. [Radio Free Europe, 1/8/2018]

Bright Idea

Noting that "nobody else has done it," on Jan. 4 Nebraska state Sen. Paul Schumacher of Columbus proposed a novel constitutional amendment with the goal of stimulating growth in western Nebraska: Delegate complete or partial sovereignty over a designated, limited and sparsely populated area. "If I were a major business, I would not want Omaha or Lincoln ... telling me what to do," Schumacher said. The Lincoln Journal Star reported that the senator believes his concept would attract businesses looking for no state or local taxes and no state or local regulations. It presents the opportunity to "have your own state," he explained. The Nebraska legislature must approve the resolution before citizens get a chance to vote. [Lincoln Journal Star, 1/5/2018]

Public Safety

Tennessee's legislature has a newly renovated home in the Cordell Hull building in Nashville, so Lt. Gov. Randy McNally and House Speaker Beth Harwell have been busy outlining some new rules. "Hand-carried signs and signs on hand sticks" will be strictly prohibited because they pose a "serious safety hazard." Animals, too, will be turned away at the door, reported The Tennessean on Dec. 21. But in a dizzying twist of irony, McNally and Harwell will continue a policy they enacted last year, which allows holders of valid gun permits to bring their weapons into the building. [The Tennessean, 12/21/2017]

My Kingdom for a Burrito

-- Tampa, Florida, resident Douglas Jon Francisco, 28, was arrested for DUI after he mistook a Spring Hill bank drive-thru lane for a Taco Bell. On Jan. 17, around 5 p.m., the bank branch manager noticed a driver passed out in a blue Hyundai sedan in the drive-thru lane. When the manager went out to the car and banged on the window, Francisco woke up and tried to order a burrito, according to the Tampa Bay Times. After being set straight about the bank not serving Mexican fast food, Francisco drove around to the front of the building and parked, where deputies found him and administered a field sobriety test, which he failed. "He made several statements that were differing from reality," a Hernando County Sheriff's deputy reported. [Tampa Bay Times, 1/18/2018]

-- A Facebook event calling for a candlelight vigil to remember a destroyed Taco Bell restaurant in Montgomery, Alabama, started as a joke. But according to United Press International, about 100 people showed up on Jan. 21 to pay their respects to the popular fast-food restaurant, which burned on Jan. 17 after electrical equipment sparked a fire. The owner promised to rebuild and "have a true celebration upon re-opening." [United Press International, 1/23/2018]

Take That!

In Dresden, Germany, police reported that two men were injured on Jan. 15 after hitting each other with their cars in consecutive accidents. The first man, 49, pulled into a handicapped parking spot, then saw his mistake and backed out, accidentally hitting a 72-year-old man walking behind the car. The two men exchanged information for a report, then the older man got into his car and reversed out of his parking spot, hitting the younger man. Both men suffered only slight injuries, according to the Associated Press. [Associated Press, 1/16/2018]

For the Love of Animals

Richard the 15-year-old pony, of Bridgton, Maine, has had a rough winter. He was suffering from cancer of his penis and infection when temperatures plummeted to negative 25 degrees, which caused frostbite. As a result, part of the animal's flesh broke off while he was being examined, the Associated Press reported. The Animal Rescue Unit in Bridgton has taken responsibility for the pony and has raised more than $4,000 for his care, including reconstructive surgery. Brogan Horton of Animal Rescue Unit said the goal is for Richard to live out his life pain-free. [Associated Press, 1/17/2018]

Cliche Come to Life

Outdoorsman Sergey Terekhov, 64, had just let his dogs out to run before a January hunting outing in Russia's remote Saratov region when one of the dogs bounded back to him and clawed the trigger of Terekhov's double-barreled shotgun, shooting the man in the abdomen. The Telegraph reported that his brother rushed Terekhov to the hospital, but he died less than an hour after the shooting. [The Telegraph, 1/22/2018]

Road Rage

Distracted driving caused long backups and at least one minor traffic accident on Jan. 20 as a man wandered along I-95 in Philadelphia -- in the buff. The Philadelphia Inquirer reported the stripped-down man walked along the shoulder and in and out of the right lane around noon, throwing items at cars before being taken into custody by police. His name was not released. [The Philadelphia Inquirer, 1/20/2018]

Compulsions

Bradley Hardison, 27, of Elizabeth City, North Carolina, achieved minor celebrity status in 2014 when he won a doughnut-eating contest sponsored by the Elizabeth City Police Department. (He ate eight glazed doughnuts in two minutes.) At the time, police had been looking for Hardison as a suspect in break-ins going back to 2013, so they arrested him, and he received a suspended sentence that ended in October 2017. But a doughnut habit is hard to break: The Virginian-Pilot reported that Hardison was charged on Jan. 18 with robbing a Dunkin' Donuts store on Nov. 21. [Virginian-Pilot, 1/19/2018]

Fooled Ya!

-- Montreal, Canada, machinist and cabinetmaker Simon Laprise, 33, took advantage of a recent snowfall to carve a DeLorean DMC-12 (the "Back to the Future" car) in the snowbank in the street in front of his home on Jan. 16. "I decided to do something out of the mountain of snow, to do a little joke to the snow guys," Laprise told Vice. In a "stroke of luck," Laprise found a windshield wiper across the street, which he placed on the snow-car's windshield. He missed a visit from the Montreal police, but others, who snapped photos, caught them looking perplexed at the "car" parked in a no-parking zone. In the end, they left Laprise a "ticket" that read, "You made our night." Sadly, the snowplow drivers weren't as generous, and Laprise's snow-car was reduced to the junkyard of history. [Vice, 1/17/2018]

-- Levi Miles, 28, took a bold gamble on July 27 when he and Chloe Rimmer, 24, approached a valet desk at the posh Vinoy Renaissance Resort & Golf Club in St. Petersburg, Florida, and demanded the keys to the $300,000 yellow 2014 Ferrari 458 Italia Spider sitting nearby. The valet stand was busy, and Miles told the clerk his ticket was inside the car. The valet gave him the keys but stopped paying attention when Miles didn't return with the ticket and a tip, reported the Tampa Bay Times. Eventually, the car drove off, but within minutes was stopped by police for non-working taillights, and officers found cocaine on the dashboard. The couple were taken into custody. Miles explained to police that he was only trying to impress Rimmer, whom he had just met. Rimmer admitted she thought it was odd that Miles didn't seem to know how to drive the car, but he did manage to "move it." The car's owner filed a lawsuit for negligence against the resort and the parking operator in January. [Tampa Bay Times, 1/24/2018]

Update

If you've been wondering whatever happened to Barney the Dinosaur, the Daily Mail has the answer for you. David Joyner, 54, romped inside the big purple suit for 10 years on the 1990s "Barney & Friends" show on PBS. Today, he's a tantric sex guru in Los Angeles who says he can unite his clients' body, mind and spirit through tantric massage and unprotected sex. Joyner credits his tantric training with helping him endure the 120-degree temperatures inside the Barney suit. While "surprised," Stephen White, former head writer on the show, said he sees Joyner's new vocation as the "'I love you, you love me' deal, but different. I don't judge or anything, but that's a side of David I didn't know." [Daily Mail, 1/23/2018]

Ikea has taken advertising in a whole new direction with its recent print ad for a crib. The ad, which appears in the Swedish magazine Amelia, invites women who think they might be pregnant to urinate on the paper to reveal a discounted price. "Peeing on this ad may change your life," the ad reads at the top of the page. "If you are expecting, you will get a surprise right here in the ad." Adweek reported that the agency behind the gimmick adapted pregnancy test technology to work on a magazine page. [Adweek, 1/9/2018]

Recurring Themes

In more extreme weather news from Australia, The Daily Telegraph reported on Jan. 8 that record high temperatures near Campbelltown had killed more than 200 bats, found on the ground or still hanging in trees. Cate Ryan, a volunteer with WIRES, an Australian wildlife rescue organization, came across the flying foxes and put the word out for volunteers to bring water to rehydrate the bats that were still alive. "I have never seen anything like it before," Ryan said. "Ninety percent of the (dead) flying foxes were babies or juveniles." [The Daily Telegraph, 1/8/2018]

Bright Idea

Chris McCabe, 70, of Totnes, England, escaped a frigid death thanks to his own quick thinking on Dec. 15. McCabe owns a butcher shop, and he had entered the walk-in freezer behind the shop when the door slammed behind him. Ordinarily that wouldn't be a problem, as a release button inside the freezer can open the door. But the button was frozen solid. So McCabe looked around the freezer and saw the shop's last "black pudding," or blood sausage, which he used as a battering ram to unstick the button. "They are a big long stick that you can just about get your hand around," McCabe told the Mirror. "I used it like the police use battering rams to break door locks in. Black pudding saved my life, without a doubt." He believes he would have died within a half-hour in the -4-degree freezer. [The Mirror, 1/11/2018]

Ironies

-- In Albuquerque, New Mexico, a church's new electronic bells are creating a living hell for neighbor Bernadette Hall-Cuaron, who has lived next to Our Lady of Guadalupe for years. "The bells ring multiple times a day during the week, and play 'Amazing Grace' during the week, and then they run multiple times again during the weekend," she told KOB-TV in January. "Because of the volume and frequency of the bells, this is not calling people to the church." Hall-Cuaron called the church to complain, but said since her request, "they have added 'Amazing Grace' every day ... a full verse." The pastor responded that he has lowered the volume but will not turn off the bells completely, as some in the neighborhood love them. [KOB-TV, 1/9/2018]

-- One of Quebec City's iconic tourist attractions is its ice hotel, the 45-room Hotel de Glace. But on Jan. 9, the hotel's most dreaded disaster, a fire, broke out in one of the guest rooms, the CBC reported. Manager Jacques Desbois admitted that "when I received the phone call, they had to repeat twice that there was a fire in the ice hotel." Predictably, the flames did not spread and caused little damage to the structure, although smoke spread throughout the hotel and residents were evacuated. "In a room made out of ice and snow there are few clues to look at," Desbois said, although each room has candles, and the hotel is considering the possibility that one of them caused the fire. [CBC News, 1/9/2018]

Family Values

Alyce H. Davenport, 30, and Diron Conyers, 27, of Southbridge, Massachusetts, couldn't make it to the funeral of Audra Johnson, Davenport's mother, on Jan. 5 because they were busy stealing a safe from Johnson's home. Southbridge police started searching for the pair after Johnson's boyfriend discovered the safe was missing, reported The Worcester Telegram & Gazette. When police stopped Davenport the next day, they found the safe in the trunk of the car she was driving (also registered to Johnson) and seized it. Davenport and Conyers were arrested at a Sturbridge motel, where officers found jewelry, keys, cellphones and other documents, and the two were charged with seven counts related to the theft. "Alyce has a history of larceny, identity theft and forgery," the police report said. [Telegram & Gazette, 1/9/2018]

Armed and Frustrated

Linda Jean Fahn, 69, of Goodyear, Arizona, finally succumbed to a frustration many wives suffer. On Dec. 30, as her husband sat on the toilet, she barged in and "shot two bullets at the wall above his head to make him listen to me," she told Goodyear police when they were called to the scene. Fahn said her husband "would have had to be 10 feet tall to be hit by the bullets," ABC15 in Phoenix reported, but officers estimated the bullets struck about 7 inches over the man's head as he ducked. She was charged with aggravated assault. [ABC15 Arizona, 1/8/2018]

Creme de la Weird

An unnamed 41-year-old Chinese woman who had been suffering from fevers and breathing problems for six years finally went for a checkup in early January at a hospital in Tongchuan, Shaanxi Province, China. Doctors X-rayed and found an inch-long chili pepper in her right lung. Metro News reported that Dr. Luo Lifeng tried to remove the pepper using a probe but was forced to operate because it was lodged too deep to reach. He speculated that she had inhaled the pepper and then forgotten about it. [Metro News, 1/11/2018]

Go Ahead, Take Two

An unnamed Russian man, apparently desperate for a drink, stole an armored personnel carrier from a secured facility on Jan. 10 and used it to ram a storefront in Apatity, Russia, reported United Press International. Surveillance video showed him climbing out of the tank-like carrier and into the store, where he retrieved a bottle of wine, then returning to the vehicle and ramming the storefront again as several bystanders looked on. He was arrested after leaving the scene. [United Press International, 1/11/2018]

Employee Relations

Pesto's Pizza Shop in Boise, Idaho, takes its pizza prep seriously. So when an employee burns a pizza, the discipline is swift and public: The worker must don an orange bag that reads "I burned a pizza," then "walk the plank," or the sidewalk, in front of the shop five times. Pesto's owner, Lloyd Parrott, told KBOI TV: "You know, we gotta have some fun around here. It's all in good fun." [KBOI, 1/9/2018]

Oops

An unnamed man tried an unconventional method to kill a wolf spider in his Redding, California, apartment on Jan. 7: He set it afire with a torch lighter. Unfortunately, the burning spider ran onto a mattress and caught it on fire. Residents were able to put out the mattress fire, but not before flames reached nearby drapes and a flag collection, then a nearby closet, reported the Redding Record Searchlight. When a garden hose failed to douse the blaze, firefighters were called and prevented it from spreading to other apartments. The blaze caused about $11,000 in damage, and all the residents were able to escape unharmed. [Redding Record Searchlight, 1/7/2018]

Redneck Chronicles

Daniel Bennett, 18, of Irvington, Alabama, was charged in Mobile County with bestiality after "engag(ing) in or submit(ting) to any sexual contact with an animal, to wit: a horse." The horse's owner, Francine Janes, and her husband became suspicious when their dogs started barking the evening of Jan. 4. They found Bennett, dressed in a trenchcoat carrying burglar's tools, hiding in one of their barn stalls, Janes told WPMI-TV. Bennett told Janes "he wanted to pet (Polly) the horse," but he admitted to sheriff's investigators he molested Polly. Janes said she suspects Bennett had visited Polly "seven, maybe 10 times," because "toilet paper had been left. ... Items had been turned over. And that's as far as I want to go." [WPMI, 1/8/2018]

Compelling Explanations

Troy, Michigan, police received two calls early on Jan. 10, both leading them to the Zion Church. One call was from the church, reporting vandalism caused by gunfire. The other was from the alleged shooter, who told police the church was an alien spaceship. Surveillance video shows the unnamed shooter, 40, driving up to the church around 5 a.m. and firing shots into the doors. "He was talking very strangely about how the Zion Church is an alien spaceship for reptiles," Troy Police Capt. Bob Redmond told WJBK-TV in Detroit. Police were assessing the shooter's mental health to determine whether charges would be filed. [WJBK-TV, 1/11/2018]