DEAR HARRIETTE: During the quarantine and shutdown, I closed my small nail salon for 10 weeks. I had all the ups and downs, fears and frustrations people talk about. One huge one was based on the fact that we were told to close for two weeks to flatten the curve, but they only picked certain industries.

So while we small businesses complied 100% in the fervent hope of reopening as soon as possible, the big box stores packed in the customers. The garden centers, grocery chains and hardware stores were completely crowded with no regulations, leading to the 10-week shutdown for the rest of us.

Unfortunately, my frustration bubbled over onto a friend when I called to see how she was faring. We have been friends on and off for years. She lives a few towns away and has a similar small personal services business. She reported that she'd found a loophole and gotten her business deemed essential so she could stay open. She has a face-to-face business where she touches people's bare skin.

As carefully as I could, but through clenched teeth, I asked her how she could justify elevating her services above mammograms and dental exams and such, which were all suspended. I was incensed because I felt she put us all at risk of staying home longer when we all needed to work. I could hear that I highly offended her, and the rest of the call was strained. We haven't spoken since.

I am now sorry, even though I firmly believe what she did was the height of bad ethics. I'm afraid to initiate an apology that could devolve into explanations and make things worse. But I do want to try to apologize. -- Sorry in the South

DEAR SORRY IN THE SOUTH: Call her. Check to see if she is well. Tell her you are sorry that you blew up when you talked a while back. Don’t revisit the reason for your argument. You can maintain your belief about her choice and rekindle your relationship if you both want to do so.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have two questions regarding texting etiquette. First, I have relatives who have made the decision not to respond back to texts. One of them told me they are not generally responding to anyone because it is time-consuming. I find it irresponsible and rude. What should I do?

Next question: I have a dear friend who will send a text that consists of 10 questions. "How is Sissy doing? Did you go to church last week? Is your daughter in town? Did you see your son on Friday?" and on and on, all in one text! Can you please give some guidance on how to conduct such a text conversation? -- Navigating the Texting World

DEAR NAVIGATING THE TEXTING WORLD: Texting has become a primary method of communication for many people, yet it can be overwhelming for a variety of reasons. I think that the best way for you to come to a peaceful relationship with texting is to know your own comfort level and those of the people with whom you communicate.

In the first instance, if you have relatives who refuse to text back, stop texting them. It clearly doesn’t work for them. Instead, pick up the phone and call them when you have a need or desire to be in touch. In the other situation, if the barrage of questions is too much, answer what you can and leave the rest for another engagement. You could also tell your friend (not in writing) that it’s hard for you to answer so many questions at a time. Perhaps you should pick up the phone to call that friend when the list of questions is too long to write back.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend will be visiting from California for a family funeral and asked if I and another friend wanted to get together overnight at a friend's cabin. I agreed, as I have been watching social media and have noticed how they are responding to mask-wearing. I thought maybe the plane ride home would be a high-risk situation for my friends; however, airlines are ensuring people wear masks.

My California friend asked if we could invite another friend. After the friend who owns the cabin said yes, my California friend went ahead and invited our other friend without my input. I love this other friend, but, observing her social media, I don't see her practicing safe social distancing. In addition, she has two kids physically going to high school and sports. I have decided not to attend the overnight gathering with the other three friends due to this. Should I be honest about why I am not going to attend? We have a family member who is gravely ill, so I can cite that as my reason. But I’m upset about how this was handled and not sure what to do next. Thanks for any help. -- Too Many Friends, Not Enough Space

DEAR TOO MANY FRIENDS, NOT ENOUGH SPACE: If your friends ask you why you didn’t join them, tell them. Many people who contract COVID-19 these days do so when they let their guard down around people they are close to -- friends, family and loved ones.

You made a smart decision based on the facts at hand -- including having the ill family member. Remind your friends to stay vigilant and to wear masks even when they are inside the cabin. You don’t have to chastise them for how the invitations went out. But you can encourage them to be as safe as possible.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I loved your answer to Young Voter who is having a difficult time dealing with her emotions amid the discord and chaos of this election environment. She would not be alone even among caring voters 50 or more years older, myself included. Your advising her to become as knowledgeable as possible about each candidate and his or her aims and implications for our country was spot on. It may be difficult to accomplish but not impossible if she listens to both sides and to what other respected people have to say about them. In my 58 years of voting eligibility, I have exercised my right in every national and local election, casting votes only for candidates I have researched as thoroughly as possible. The key going forward as an involved citizen is to remain vigilant to the process.

I’d like to add to your suggestion that YV urge other young people to be sure to vote. Too many times voters do only that; they go to the polls and cast a vote with only the most superficial information. They think that the act itself fulfills their civic duty and that it doesn’t matter for whom they vote. Since they have usually had no substantial instruction throughout their public school years about the history, purpose and workings of our (or any) government, their votes are nothing more than shots in the dark, while counting just as much as an informed vote. I believe YV’s friends should also be encouraged to educate themselves to become mindful, serious citizen voters. That is the only way we can all take honest responsibility for our own sacred, privileged participation in government of and by the people. WE are The People! -- Proud Independent Voter

DEAR PROUD INDEPENDENT VOTER: Amen! This is what I say all the time. Thanks for the reminder.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went through my boyfriend’s phone when he was asleep because I felt like he was acting suspicious. I know my boyfriend, and this day he just wasn’t being himself. He would lean away from me with his phone and kept it out of sight from me as much as he could. He’s never done that before. So when I had a chance, I looked, expecting to see him doing something like buying expensive sneakers he didn’t want me to know about.

To my surprise, I found text messages that he had gone to the gym with one of his exes. I woke him up to confront him, and we argued to the point where I just left. He keeps calling me, but I don’t know what to think or feel. I won’t stand for him lying to me. Should I just leave now? -- Not Standing for It

DEAR NOT STANDING FOR IT: Your approach was extreme. Waking up your boyfriend to confront him about what appeared to be an indiscretion could only end in an argument. If you care about him, talk to him. Find out what’s going on. Let him state his case. Find out what he wants in your relationship. Decide what you want. You can get over an indiscretion if you both decide to work on it. Staying in a standoff will get you nothing. Talk it out and make a decision after that.

DEAR HARRIETTE: There is one thing you did not consider in replying to the woman whose mother has Alzheimer's and inherited all of her grandmother's estate. Relatives were harassing the granddaughter, who is responsible for her mother's financial affairs, to give the money to them instead.

I suspect the grandmother may have left everything to the daughter with Alzheimer's because she knew how expensive her care could become as the disease progresses. My guess is that those vultures will never be happy even if the money is shared with them. If the granddaughter wants to share what is left of the inheritance after her mom is gone (assuming there is anything left to share), she can deal with it then, but the first priority now should be caring for the one to whom it was left. -- Word to the Wise

DEAR WORD TO THE WISE: Thank you and all who chimed in on this conundrum. Families often squabble viciously over the dollars and belongings that loved ones leave behind when they die. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for the woman who is only trying to take care of her mother while staying connected to her family.

You and many others wrote in to warn her about how costly Alzheimer’s care can be, even if you do have good insurance. Further, the life span of a person with Alzheimer’s can be long, meaning resources will be needed over time. Perhaps it was the grandmother’s understanding of her daughter’s potential road ahead that made her leave her estate to her singularly. The granddaughter's job is to take care of her mother and do her best not to be too distraught by the words and actions of other family members.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)