DEAR HARRIETTE: I made a big mistake on the job, and I am not sure what to do about it. I know what happened and why, and it was definitely my fault. The thing is, if I tell anybody, I am probably going to lose my job. I don’t think that an apology will be enough. My mistake cost my company money and probably damaged their reputation a bit, too. I feel horrible about it. But since nobody knows that I did it, I feel like if I just stay under the radar and make sure nothing bad ever happens again, I could get a pass. I know I will never make a stupid mistake like this again. Do you think it’s OK to stay under the radar? Or do I need to confess to my boss what I did? -- Do I Reveal?

DEAR DO I REVEAL?: There’s an old saying that the truth will always be revealed. The question in your case is whether you get in front of it, own up to your mistakes and admit what happened, or if you wait, with trepidation, for the moment that it is discovered. I vote for being upfront about the situation. Even if you lose your job, it is better to be honest. But you may be able to save your job by being proactive and letting your bosses know exactly what happened, your role in it and how sorry you are. You can ask for forgiveness and promise to help the company rebuild.

On the flip side, if you say nothing, even if you last in that job, your mistake will weigh on you. Keeping secrets is not healthy for your spirit.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got a lovely note from a young woman I had mentored early in her career. I like her so much and had intended to stay in touch, but life got in the way. Her note brought everything back home about how close we had gotten and how fond I am of her. Being back in touch with her reminded me of how much I would like to keep her closer in my life. She is about to get married, and I would like to be there for that part of her life, too. Should I tell her? We love each other. I think she will be happy. -- Reconnecting

DEAR RECONNECTING: Given that this woman reached out to you, you know for sure that she is thinking about you. That’s wonderful. Here is your second chance at cultivating a closer bond. Tell her how much you would like to meet the person she will soon marry. Invite them to dinner so that you can get to know him and get to know her better as the woman she is blossoming into.

Take it slow. She is building a new life and is likely busy. You can call, email or text with her and occasionally try to see her. Do not ask for a wedding invitation. That is often a tricky subject. Instead, just be happy to rekindle your bond and see where it leads.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was given a check by a family friend for Christmas last year, and I just found it. It’s more than a year old. I feel horrible about that, because he is close to our family. I don’t want him to think that I ignored him, and I also want to cash the check. Do you think it’s too late to deposit it? If so, do you think it would be all right for me to ask him to write me a new check? I feel a little uncomfortable because he did not write me a check this year. -- Outdated Check

DEAR OUTDATED CHECK: Sadly, many people misplace gift checks -- and other checks -- only to discover them many months or even years later. Typically, a check is no longer valid after 180 days of being issued. Hence, your year-old check is worthless. This regulation protects the issuer of the check so that money is not being held hostage for too long.

You should shred that check and chalk it up to your mistake. Since this friend did not give a check this year, you should not ask for him to rewrite it. This is your loss, but so be it. Next time you get a check, deposit it immediately. It’s a lot easier to do now that you can deposit a check electronically by using your smartphone, if you have one. If you don’t, just make a trip to the bank right away.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is in high school, and she has begun to wear makeup. For the most part, it looks tasteful and appropriate for her age. The other day, she put on a lip color that was way too bright, and it was all you could see on her face. I told her that it was not the right color and that she should change it. This turned into a full-blown confrontation. She accused me of not allowing her to express her individuality. The argument escalated until I put my foot down and demanded that she take it off. That really wasn’t how I had wanted to handle the situation. How can I revisit this? I just wanted her to see that this color was not flattering. -- Bad Lip Color

DEAR BAD LIP COLOR: Keeping a healthy rapport with your teenager is key to protecting and guiding her through life. That means when you have stumbles that include inflamed emotions -- on either side -- you need to do your best to course correct right away.

Sit your daughter down and apologize for the blowup. Tell her you never meant for the discussion about lip color to escalate into a showdown. All you wanted was for her to see that the color she selected was unbecoming. Assure her that you want her to explore her individuality and that you need her to understand that your job is to help guide her steps.

What you could have done is to have her take a selfie and then look at the picture with that lip color. You can encourage her in the future to do color tests by looking at several lip colors in photos that she takes so she can make an informed choice. Remind her that a good guideline for lip color is that it should not be so strong that people notice your lips before your eyes.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just watched the Lifetime series about R&B singer R. Kelly, which alleges he had sex with minors. It was horrible to watch. There were so many stories of young teenagers being abused.

I have a teenager who wants to get into the music industry, and this scared me all over again. I don’t know if the stories about R. Kelly, specifically, are true. He wasn’t convicted of these charges. I’m not so much worried about him. I’m concerned about the other predators who might be out there. How can I protect my daughter from an adult who might want to seduce her? It is so hard for teenagers to listen to their parents. -- On the Lookout

DEAR ON THE LOOKOUT: That docuseries brought to light many of the worst fears a parent has about what can happen to impressionable, hopeful young people when they are at the mercy of someone older and more powerful. As a parent, your job is to teach your teen to protect herself and to recognize when people are trying to cross the line. Experts suggest that predators are masterful at wooing innocent younger people into their clutches, so your entreaties must be clear. No touching of any kind. No late-night phone calls. No sexting or sharing of photos or suggestive commentary. No unsupervised engagements -- even in the music industry. Minors should have chaperones. As much as your teen may hate this idea, show her what’s going on in the news, including with R. Kelly, to help her know that this is serious.

Also, be aware that most sexual predators of our children are people we already know. So teach your teen to be mindful of any suspicious people in their surroundings. Do your best to build a strong rapport with your teen so that she knows that if ever she needs rescuing, at any time of day or night, you will come -- without judgment.

To learn more about what you can do to support your child and the warning signs of sexual abuse, go to: bit.ly/2LZxSuA. For more information on avoiding online predators, go to: bit.ly/2sjBDCc.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have terrible acne, and it makes me feel really insecure. I have tried to talk to my mother about it, but even though she’s in her late 30s, she still has acne too. Obviously, neither of us is doing the right thing. I have read about acne and have changed my diet, but nothing seems to help. I feel like everybody is looking at me and my skin. What can I do? -- Acne Is Killing Me

DEAR ACNE IS KILLING ME: Ask your mother to contact your doctor's office for a referral to a dermatologist. If she drops the ball, call yourself. If you have insurance, you can become proactive. Go to your pediatrician and get an examination. Then visit a dermatologist, who will evaluate your skin and give you a medical regimen to help get your skin healthy. You will likely get more dietary restrictions and guidelines. Follow them vigilantly.

In the meantime, you can stop drinking soda and limit your liquid intake to water. Less sugar and starch should aid in your overall health and skin condition.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)