DEAR HARRIETTE: I have two children who are of voting age. I have been teaching them about the importance of voting since they were little. I believe my kids will vote in the primaries, but I worry about them and their friends. Kids these days seem so apathetic. How can I inspire my children and their friend group to take the midterms seriously? We need young people to wake up and participate in the political process. If I am too heavy-handed, they will ignore me. How can I get them to take action? -- Go to the Polls, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR GO TO THE POLLS: Encourage your children to volunteer around the election. Suggest that they gather a group of friends and offer to help people in a retirement home get to the polls on Election Day. Talk about other ideas that include them being of service to others to make sure that their voices are heard. Or you can suggest that they call up their friends and make a “date” to go vote and then hang out after. Ask them what they can do to make it fun. As you do this, remind them -- without being too pushy -- that their future lies in the hands of whoever wins the election on Nov. 6. They owe it to themselves to make sure their voice counts.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been nervous about everything over the past year. I find it hard to sleep at night. Recently, without even realizing it, I have started to bite my nails in my sleep. It’s totally weird. I never bit my nails as a child. But as a mature adult, I have awakened a couple of times with half my nails chewed up, and I had no memory of it. I feel like I’m of out of control. What do you recommend I do to get ahold of this? My hands look crazy, but more than how they look is the fact that I can’t remember biting my nails. -- Figure It Out, Detroit

DEAR FIGURE IT OUT: Think about the stress that you are facing these days. Make a written list of the things that are bothering you, and pay particular attention to anything that seems new or amplified. Have there been changes in your work? Your home life? Friendships? Health? Finances? You say it’s been happening over the course of this year. Your job is to single out what is making this year different from others.

Armed with that information, get a physical. Talk to your doctor about what’s been happening with you, and ask for guidance. Be specific when you share your personal evaluation of your life this year. The more you tell the doctor, the better able he or she will be to get you the help you need. You may be referred to a mental health professional who can help you sort through your feelings and come to some resolution that will calm you.

Also consider meditation, deep breathing, going to bed earlier and surrounding yourself with positive people.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in a rental building that has started to gentrify. A new couple moved in a few months ago, and I have tried to welcome them. We are different from each other, but still cordial.

The wife has been complaining about lots of things in the building, and while she was complaining she told me that she pays what is comparable to three times my rent -- for the same size apartment. I didn’t think it was smart to tell her what I pay. I’m concerned, though, that these high-paying neighbors may start to push the rest of us out. I have seen it before. How can I help them to feel like part of our community without giving them ammo to try to get us out of the building? -- New Neighbor Drama, Manhattan, New York

DEAR NEW NEIGHBOR DRAMA: Continue to be friendly and responsive to your neighbors. If there are any building traditions, make sure you let them know, such as participating in giving out candy at Halloween or any type of group activity for the tenants. If there is a tenants’ organization, encourage them to join. This is how they will learn more about how things work in your building and in your community.

If your neighbors have legitimate gripes about the building, show compassion. Also, give context. Many landlords are lazy when it comes to handling basic needs. It can be true that new, higher-paying tenants may get the landlord’s attention faster, at least in the beginning. Encourage the new tenants to think of everyone when they lobby for change. Help them to feel they are part of your community. This may make it easier for them to be inclusive rather than attempting down the line to oust anybody.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is a police officer. I am proud of him for choosing a tough job, but it is hard for me to listen to his stories. I am blown away by what he tells me he goes through on some days. After he tells me about those days, I am then stuck in fear for a month or more, worried about whether my man is going to come home at all. I don’t want to end this relationship, but I feel like we have to manage how much he tells me.

Am I wrong for not being able to deal with his job? I don’t know if I can handle it if we stay together, but for now, I know I can’t be privy to all of his experiences. I worry that he is going to die every day. He is not at risk of a gunshot wound or other dangerous incident every day -- it just feels like it. -- Keep It to Yourself, Washington, D.C.

DEAR KEEP IT TO YOURSELF: Many couples do not share blow-by-blow details of their workday on a daily basis. You can surely ask your boyfriend to keep his sharing to a minimum. Be sure to explain why.

Bigger than that, you two need to talk about the future. What can you handle? Not discussing his job doesn’t make it any less real. You have to be crystal clear about what you’re signing up for and be willing to accept the potential danger in your boyfriend’s job choice. Otherwise, it won’t work.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I grew up very different from each other. His family members were all farmers, while mine were educated and spent a lot of time in so-called high society.

My husband and I get along great, but things get awkward whenever we go to social functions. He doesn’t have the social graces expected at these events. He bristles when I try to tell him. I don’t mean to be a nag, but I do think it will make his life easier if he would be willing to follow some of the basic codes of etiquette that these settings expect. How can I get that across to him? -- Supporting My Man, Dallas

DEAR SUPPORTING MY MAN: If you can make learning these codes of conduct fun, you will have a better chance of inspiring your husband to participate. Look for a social dancing or etiquette class in your neighborhood that you two can take together. You can learn the waltz, formal dressing, the art of small talk at these social events, etc. Doing this as a couple can create closeness and will foster togetherness rather than making him feel that he has to have remedial training. I learned long ago that life gets easier to navigate when you understand who you are, what your values are and what’s expected where you are going.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I hired a cousin who was in need of work to help me out on a project. We talk a lot, and I got the sense that she would work well on this particular project. She agreed, and things started out OK, but it hasn’t gone smoothly lately. We have scheduled several calls that she missed. She got busy with another job and didn’t complete the work that she had agreed to do. She seems nonchalant, like it’s not so bad that she hasn’t completed the work since she’s my cousin.

She has put me in a bind. I needed her help in a timely manner, and now the work is not done. How should I address this with her? I need to reassign it to someone else. -- Bad Family Vibes, St. Louis

DEAR BAD FAMILY VIBES: Put on your professional hat and let your cousin know that you have to part ways because she has not fulfilled the obligations that she accepted. Tell her how disappointed you are that she did not take the work seriously. Explain how her lack of professionalism has put you in a bind, and you don’t appreciate it. She needs to know the impact that her inability to complete the work has meant for you. She also needs to understand that she has damaged her reputation. You cannot recommend her to others because she did not do her best for you.

After you talk to her, it’s time to pivot. Find someone who can help you get your work done.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)