DEAR HARRIETTE: The rising number of school shootings has taken a toll on my children, especially my high school-age son. After the Parkland, Florida, shooting, he asked questions like, “Why would he do that?” Through our conversations, I have explained to him that sometimes these shootings can result from bullying and mental illness. He is still afraid to go to school. Every morning, he says he’s sick, hoping I will let him stay home.

In times like these, when violence seems to be increasing and schools do not seem safe, how do I teach my children that it is OK to live and not be afraid? -- Mother Needs Answers, Denver

DEAR MOTHER NEEDS ANSWERS: You are right to be concerned. What the most recent shooting in Parkland, Florida, proves is that this horrific type of mass murder can occur anywhere. The good news, if you can call it that, is that many of the students from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School have organized and are making their voices heard to lawmakers, both locally and nationally. They have become activists against gun violence in schools and are trying to force lawmakers to revisit the legal status of semiautomatic weapons.

Encourage your son to have a voice as well. He can write to your representatives in the state legislature, to the U.S. House of Representatives and Senate, and to the president of the United States to express his concerns. Becoming active in the struggle can be empowering. He can advocate ways that his own school can become safer. Encourage your son to speak about his fears and desires for safety. This may help him to feel less afraid. If needed, you can also talk to the psychologist at his school to ask for mental health support.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband is English, and I am African-American. We have been married for three years and just had our first child. We come from different backgrounds and cultures, and we both want to inform our child about her cultures when she is older. Because we live in the United States and his family is in the United Kingdom, we don’t get to see them much. Our daughter spends much more time with my side of the family. My husband has brought it up to me as a concern and I agree with him, but I don't know how to change things since his family is far away and it’s not easy to visit as often as we would like. How can my husband and I teach my daughter about her cultures equally? -- Striking a Balance, Memphis, Tennessee

DEAR STRIKING A BALANCE: It is natural for a family to gravitate to one side more than the other. In your case, simple geography is the culprit. To ensure that your daughter learns about both sides of her family, you two can be mindful of telling stories. Your husband can share stories about his childhood and anything he remembers about his family. You can Skype or FaceTime with the British relatives as well. Just because you aren’t in the same country does not mean that you cannot communicate. It will take effort. Work together to make time for everyone.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I struggled with my weight throughout my teenage and young adult years, but I am now content with how I look and feel. An aunt I don’t see often has been on a fitness journey and has been losing weight. I’m happy for her, but she always mentions my appearance and gives advice on what I should do. It makes me feel like the way I look isn’t OK or is unhealthy. I don’t like being around her or talking with her because it never fails -- she mentions how I look. It's frustrating me because I have grown to be confident in the way I look. How do I stay strong and respectful to my aunt’s body image advice? -- Staying Confident, El Paso, Texas

DEAR STAYING CONFIDENT: Start with yourself. For your own good, get a physical to find out if you are at a healthy weight and if there is anything you should be doing to support a healthy life. That’s for you to do and know for yourself, and you do not need to share this with anyone.

As far as your aunt is concerned, you need to speak up and ask her to back off. Tell her you are paying attention to your health, that you like the way you look and that you do not appreciate her constant badgering of you about your appearance. Yes, this is strong talk, but it seems like she doesn’t realize how her words are affecting you. Be clear that you love her, but add that it is hard for you to talk to her because you feel she is always criticizing you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mother has always been attentive and caring to all her children, but now it’s getting too much for me. I have always kept to myself, and I am content with no physical touch and having plenty of alone time. I am a recent college grad who lives at home, and I'm actively looking for a job. My mother is constantly asking if something is wrong. It gets to the point where it’s annoying, and I have an attitude and isolate myself to avoid the questions and lashing out. She comes from a good place when she asks me, but it’s frustrating because I tell her I'm fine but it seems she still wants to find something wrong. It’s pushing me away from her, and I don’t want that for our relationship. How do I reassure her that I am fine? -- Badgering Mom, Detroit

DEAR BADGERING MOM: Your mother is naturally concerned that you are a young adult still living at home, not currently employed, trying to figure out your next steps. Honestly, you probably do have some issues that make you less than “fine” under the circumstances.

One way to get your mother off your back is to share with her your ideas and plans. What type of work are you looking for? Are you setting up job interviews? What strategy are you putting into place to get you to the next level?

Share some of these thoughts with your mother. It will give her some relief in knowing that you are actively working to map out your future. It will also make it easier for you to remind her that you need alone time and that this doesn’t automatically mean that something is wrong.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family has always been very active. We all love playing sports and exercising regularly. Recently, my mother has been very into yoga. I admire her for maintaining her health and always trying to get some activity every day, but it has gotten to the point where she is obsessing over her body. She restricts her diet so much, and has been taking two or three workout classes a day.

I tell my mother that she does not need to lose any more weight, but she continues to count calories and work out extensively. How do you recommend I handle this? I want to make sure I am doing the right thing, the right way, so I do not offend my mom. -- Mother's Weight Obsession, Los Angeles

DEAR MOTHER’S WEIGHT OBSESSION: It would be great if your mother would get a physical exam. This is important because a medical evaluation of your mother’s health will tell her if she is making smart choices in her fitness and diet regimen, or if she is going too far. Suggest that your mother get her annual physical soon. Point out that since she has revved up her fitness routine, you believe it would be wise to check in with her doctor to ensure that she is being safe. Tell her that you are planning to get a physical as well. In this way, you aren’t just pointing your finger at her. One of the great things about Western medicine is the diagnostic capability that it has. With a complete medical workup, your mother will learn the status of her health and whether she should make any adjustments to her routine. Ask her if you can go with her when she schedules her visit. Then you can hear for yourself how she is doing.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I baby-sit for a family almost every weekend. This upcoming weekend they have asked me to stay over both Friday and Saturday nights because they will be out of town at a wedding. I usually don’t mind staying overnight because it saves money and time on commuting to their house. However, they have recently downsized, and there is no longer a guest room for me. They asked if I would sleep in the daughter’s room in her bunk bed. I am not a fussy person and don’t have a problem with doing this, but another part of me is saying that I shouldn’t be staying in the daughter’s bunk bed as a 22-year-old. What do you think of this? -- Sleeping in the Bottom Bunk, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR SLEEPING IN THE TOP BUNK: You need to get practical here. Since there is nowhere else for you to sleep, that’s why your employer is offering you the bunk bed. It’s not about your age or station in life. This is simply a reality check. Given that you like the family and get along well with the children, I suggest that you move past the accommodations challenge. Do you know the saying “It is what it is”? That applies here.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)