DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been binge-watching TV series for a few seasons now. I feel so embarrassed, but it really is addictive. Because of the way programming is offered now, binge-watching has become a trend. I hate to say it, but I sometimes choose to watch these shows rather than going to work on time or doing my chores. My family thinks I’ve gone loco. Even so, it’s hard to turn it off. What advice do you have for me? -- On a Loop, Santa Fe, New Mexico

DEAR ON A LOOP: Just because something is a trend doesn’t make it good for you, which is something you have learned with the experience of binge-watching TV. This trend has blossomed so quickly and broadly that media outlets write about it all the time as if it’s a great thing. As you are experiencing, anything that takes on the behavior of an addiction is not great. Instead, it represents being out of control.

What you must grasp is that you can regain control. Start by evaluating the quality of your life right now, including listing what you value the most. By writing down each person, relationship, goal and responsibility, you will see right before your eyes which items measure higher than your current favorite TV program.

Separately, list the things that stand in your way. This could be anything from the binge-watching to what you eat, drink and pay attention to that is distracting. Compare the two lists. Just reviewing these two topics should help you reconsider how you spend your time. Give yourself parameters for when you are allowed to turn on any device that will show your favorite programs. Don’t turn any of them on outside that time frame. Give yourself a specific window after work hours when you can indulge in your favorite pastime. Turn it off when the time is up.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have almost a dozen black-tie events to attend this holiday season. I have a new job, and it requires me to go out a lot. What it doesn’t offer is a wardrobe budget. I can’t afford to buy fancy dresses every other week. It’s crazy. How can I go to these functions and show that I know how to do my job without going completely broke? -- Cinderella, Bethesda, Maryland

DEAR CINDERELLA: You are in luck! Today there are a number of retail establishments that offer rental options for all styles of clothing, including eveningwear. Many will mail dresses to you in several sizes for a week’s fee, which is much lower than the cost of the dress. In this way you can rent a dress and return it, giving you more budget to rent for the whole season. Some reputable sites include renttherunway.com, gwynniebee.com (for plus-size fashions) and couturecollective.com. Look online yourself. There are lots of choices, both local and national, that can help you look great without spending too much money.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Diabetes runs in my family. Nearly every adult who has reached 45 years old has gotten it, and many of my father’s relatives died of complications from it. I am so worried that it will happen to me. For years, I worked out a lot and kept myself fit.

For the past 10 years, though, I haven’t paid much attention to my health, and I have gained a ton of weight. I am worried that I could be headed toward diabetes. I’m so ashamed. I have avoided going to the doctor because I don’t want to be told I have the family curse. I feel like such a loser. I don’t know what to do. I feel as though I will be letting my family down if I have it because I could have taken preventative measures. Is it too late to do anything now? What’s my next step? -- Hopeless and Ashamed, Syracuse, New York

DEAR HOPELESS AND ASHAMED: This wake-up call about yourself can seem daunting, but don’t try to hide from whatever your truth is. Go to the doctor and get a complete physical examination. Be sure to tell your internist about your family history. You should request the test for diabetes. It is wise to know what health issues you are facing so you can deal with them directly.

If you do have diabetes, follow the protocol your doctor has given you, and be sure to exercise and pay close attention to your diet. Eliminate everything that your doctor tells you to stop eating. If you follow directions, which will include losing weight, you may be able to reduce the impact of diabetes and any other ailments the doctor may discover. Instead of being paralyzed by shame, take action. You can oversee your health. You can choose wellness.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I met a nice young man I think my parents would like a lot. He is thoughtful and attentive. He also has a good job and career aspirations even though he’s still young -- 22 years old. The one big thing that could stand in the way is that he doesn’t share our religious beliefs. We are Catholic, and he is Jewish. I’m worried both of our families will be upset about this.

It’s too soon to say whether we want to go the distance yet, but I’m worried that if we actually fall in love and decide we want to get married, our parents will stand in our way. We haven’t talked about this directly, but I know it’s on his mind too. We are both close to our families. It would be awful if they turned away from us. How should we proceed? -- On a Twisty Path, Dallas

DEAR ON A TWISTY PATH: Start with each other. Talk about the elephant in the room. Play the “what if” game. Ask yourselves what if you decided to get married. What are the pros? The cons? How would each of your families react? Do you feel that you could weather the emotional storms that might come from your religious differences? Talk about how you might choose each other when conflicts arise. Play it out to see if you think you could handle it in real time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am hosting Thanksgiving dinner at my home for the first time. It was always celebrated at my mom’s house, but she passed away last year, and it naturally fell to me. I am happy to host this event, but I do have one problem. I have two cousins who have always been difficult. They come around during the holidays, constantly freeloading without bringing anything to add to the meal -- while everybody else brings something. Not only do they want whatever we are serving, but they also criticize everything. They are rude and disrespectful.

I don’t want to invite them, but my siblings think this would be impolite. I don’t want that negativity in my home with the family. What can I do or say to gain control over this very special gathering of my family? -- New Traditions, Salem, Massachusetts

DEAR NEW TRADITIONS: Give them a chance this year. Contact them by phone and extend a personal invitation. Tell them that everyone is bringing a dish, and ask what they will bring. You may want to recommend something specific so it is easy for them to accept the invitation. Be clear with them and get a commitment. You can also let them know that everyone is sensitive now that your mother has passed away. Tell them that you are requesting that everybody make the commitment to be positive while you are together. Give them fair warning that you will jump in and change the subject if anyone starts complaining or criticizing. Your intention is to create a positive environment where everyone feels supported.

If you get pushback from your cousins about your intentions, remind them that in the past there have been uncomfortable moments thanks to their critical attitude. Make it clear you do not want them to bring that energy into your home. Yes, this is strong, but it may help the whole family to turn the corner.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have a timeshare. This holiday season we plan on going to Mexico, and we want to invite a couple that has become close to us in recent years. It won’t cost them anything to stay with us. They will just have to pay for their airfare and have money for food and sightseeing. We have no idea whether they have passports, let alone whether they would want to or be able to afford such a trip. We don’t want to put them in an awkward position, but we do want to invite them. How can we extend the invitation so they are comfortable with whatever decision they make? -- Making the Invitation, Detroit

DEAR MAKING THE INVITATION: Stop worrying about the outcome. Just make the invitation. Tell your friends how much you enjoy spending time with them. Explain that you know it may be a long shot, but you wanted to invite them to spend some time during the holidays with you at your timeshare. Outline the details and costs, and ask them to consider joining you. Point out that you know it may be inconvenient because of the busy holiday season, but you wanted to ask.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)