DEAR HARRIETTE: My stepfather has been making increasingly sexist comments whenever I visit him and (mostly) my mother. Now that they have been married a few years, I believe he thinks it's acceptable to let his guard down and spew his thoughts about how “women aren't really fit for the workplace.” I know it's a bunch of malarkey, but it still angers me that my mother doesn't say anything to him. She's been working for over 30 years! Is it not my place to speak up? I feel like he says this to get a rise out of me. -- Ignoramus Stepfather, Cambridge, Massachusetts

DEAR IGNORAMUS STEPFATHER: If your mother has yet to make a statement about her husband’s behavior, chances are, she doesn’t plan to do so. That means it is time for you to learn to ignore him. If you do not react to his comments, it is likely that he will eventually make fewer of them in your presence. You may want to figure out ways to spend time with your mother outside the house. Go on mother-daughter dates where the two of you can enjoy each other without him in the room. In this way, you will be able to avoid interacting with your stepfather for the most part.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am not a particularly talkative person, and I am comfortable with silence. What I have realized, though, is that I am atrocious at barbershop small talk. When getting a trim every few weeks, my barber attempts to speak to me about anything from sports to family. I'm far too private and awkward to give him a good conversation, and I wish he didn't feel the pressure to keep up constant conversation with me. Is there any way I can steer the conversation toward silence, or is this just a fact of life? -- Ixnay the Small Talk

DEAR IXNAY THE SMALL TALK: The best way to get your barber to stop asking you questions is for you to start asking him questions. Come up with a list of a few basic things that he typically likes to talk about. Then you start off the conversation by asking one of them. It could be as simple as “How was your week?” Or you can ask about some of the regulars who frequent the shop. You don’t even have to listen attentively. A few grunts and “uh-huhs” should keep the conversation going. When he turns the conversation to you, ease it back to him. You can say, “Oh yes, my family is fine. How is yours?” That gives him the opportunity to spend time talking about himself. You can also close your eyes and pretend to take a little nap -- or just stop talking. It could be awkward for your barber at first, but if you stop responding, eventually he will stop asking you questions.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My little sister has been pretending to take her ADD medication by half swallowing it as she walks out the door in front of my mom and coughing it up as she walks to the bus to go to school. I have seen her do this over a dozen times out the window, so I know it's not a one-time thing. Should I tell my parents about what I'm seeing? She has gotten bad reports at school, and they think this medication will help her. -- Sip and Swallow, Milwaukee

DEAR SIP AND SWALLOW: This is one of the few times that I am going to recommend that you “tell on” your sister. You absolutely should tell your parents what you have observed so that they can support your sister in getting on track. If she has been diagnosed with ADD and is receiving medication, her medical doctor and your parents believe it is necessary.

As her sister, you may also want to speak to her directly and tell her that you have seen her spit out her pills. Ask her why she refuses to take them, and do your best to find out what’s going on with her at school. Don’t try to tell her what to do, as that won’t work. But with great compassion, let her know that you care about her and want her to be healthy and to do well in school.

When your parents confront her, know that she will be angry that you revealed her behavior. Let her know that you told them because you love her and want the best for her.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been a vegan since high school with no intention of stopping. My fiance, however, is an avid meat, dairy and egg eater. I don't care about what he chooses to put into his body, but we have been fighting about food preparation recently. “Alan” hates the plant-based lifestyle, and gripes that I won't just cook him a steak. I tell him he has the complete green light to go to the store, buy himself a steak and cook it. Since Alan doesn't want to do the food shopping or cooking, I tell him to suck it up or start being proactive. Is this too harsh? We've been fighting about this for over a year. -- Sticking to My Plants, Greenwich, Connecticut

DEAR STICKING TO MY PLANTS: If you and Alan are to be married, you two need to work this out. Would you be willing to cook all of the meals if he were to become vegan? If so, that means you are putting your foot down simply because he chooses to eat differently than you. That may not be the best way to start your marriage.

If your intention is to be the primary cook, you may want to learn how to cook a few meat dishes. By giving in a little, you can create space for the two of you to grow together. You may be able to introduce some of your favorite foods to him and get him to eat less meat over time, too!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: This summer, I am directly managing an intern for my operations team. Whenever my intern has some downtime, I encourage her to go check out other departments of the company so she can learn during her time with us.

I thought this was a great plan until I realized another colleague was giving her orders and using her for errands. How do I stick up for my intern when other departments are asking her to do work that takes her away from her responsibilities? -- No Funny Business, Cleveland

DEAR NO FUNNY BUSINESS: Let’s start with assessing how much downtime your intern has. It may be beneficial to her not only to observe what other departments are doing, but also to take part in some of their work. If she is handling a task or two here and there with other departments, that may not be a problem. Before you jump to conclusions, evaluate how your intern is spending her time, what others are asking her to do and whether she feels that she is learning. Next, speak to your colleague and ask the person to clear any tasks to be given to the intern with you before assigning them so that you can manage her time. The way you can stick up for your intern is to oversee her time. You may not need to block other engagement at your job, though.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was recently given three days off because of my overtime hours in the past few weeks. At first, I was happy and grateful that I could have a break, but now I'm beginning to think that my boss just wants me out of the office. My friends tell me I'm crazy, but I don't see other people getting this much time off due to their overtime! Am I losing it, or am I right to be suspicious? -- Something's Brewing, Philadelphia

DEAR SOMETHING’S BREWING: Many companies are choosing to give employees time off rather than having to pay them overtime. This is one way that they are managing costs. At face value, your situation sounds like the new norm.

That said, if your instinct is telling you that there’s something else afoot, pay attention. When you come back to the office, request a meeting with your boss, and ask what you can do to help make your contribution more efficient. Point out that you know that he is very conscientious about the use of overtime. Ask him if he has any strategies to recommend for getting the work completed without the need for additional hours. Let him know you want to be an effective team player. Ask for his guidance on making that happen. Even if your nervousness was all in your head, showing your boss that you want to do what’s best for the company is always wise.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)