DEAR HARRIETTE: My 9-year-old daughter is going to sleepaway camp for the first time this summer, and I am a basket of nerves. She is quite independent for her age, and we have gotten excellent reports about the camp. I’m not worried about her safety. I just know how much I’m going to miss her. The most time we have spent apart from each other is a week when I had to go on a trip for work. The camp allows parents to call children only once a week. How can I stay calm when I am going to be separated from my baby for two whole weeks? I’m already driving my husband crazy just thinking about it. -- Separation Anxiety, Alexandria, Virginia

DEAR SEPARATION ANXIETY: Most camps allow parents to send items to children during their stay. You can spend some of your time planning fun gifts to send. Don’t go overboard, though. This is your daughter’s time to begin to explore her independence within a safe environment. You need to trust that she will be OK.

Focus on yourself and tasks you want to accomplish at home and at work. Include your husband as a top priority! What are some of the things that you two enjoy doing but rarely have the time for anymore? Dinner dates? Visits with friends? Road trips? Breakfast in bed on the weekend? Think of ways that you can grow closer to your husband during this two-week period. If you two start enjoying each other’s company more, the time will zip by, and your daughter will be back before you know it!

DEAR HARRIETTE: A good friend of mine is retiring from more than 30 years on the job. It was his choice to retire. He said he wanted to leave while they still wanted him to stay rather than staying beyond his welcome. He seems ready on one hand, but sad on the other. He is a teacher, and I know he is going to miss interacting with his students on a daily basis. I want to do something special for him after he retires, but he is a private person. What can I suggest that won’t seem like an imposition? We have been friends for a long time, but this is a new situation. -- Retiring, Scarsdale, New York

DEAR RETIRING: Think about what your friend enjoys. If going to fun restaurants is his style, invite him to go with you to a place that may be a new discovery for him. Look in the local newspaper as well as those in New York City to find out about cultural events going on each week and weekend. Often, these activities are free to the public.

In addition to outings, you can simply call to touch base. Check in to see how he’s doing, and ask occasionally if he would like to hang out. He must get acclimated to his new life and figure out a rhythm that works for him. You can support that, but ultimately it is his responsibility to learn how to fill his time differently.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: An acquaintance of mine asked me to read a script that he had written, but I have never gotten around to reading it. It was such an awkward moment when he asked me to read it, in person in a restaurant, that I felt compelled to say yes, but then I was either too busy, uninterested or forgetful to complete the circle. I see this guy occasionally, and I know he remembers. This was something he had worked on for a very long time. I feel bad that I agreed to do something and then reneged on it. I have no idea where the script is anymore.

This happened years ago. I bring it up now because I expect to see him at a reunion of our school in a couple of weeks. Should I apologize to him for letting him down? Should I act like it never happened? What should I do? -- Unscripted, Albuquerque, New Mexico

DEAR UNSCRIPTED: It will probably mean a lot to this man for you to acknowledge that you dropped the ball. For him to know that you didn’t mean to blow him off could lessen the blow that he has felt and possibly harbored over the years. Apologize for not fulfilling your promise. Be mindful, though, not to agree to read it now -- unless you actually will. Just say that you are sorry that you flaked years ago, and ask for his forgiveness. You can also ask how his career is going and if he ended up writing scripts.

DEAR HARRIETTE: All of my friends who still have their parents are dealing with the fragility of their parents in one way or another. That includes me, by the way. It seems like every few months or so one of them dies.

I feel horrible, but I don’t always remember who is living and who has passed on. I made the mistake last year of asking about the father of one of my friends, only to be told that he had died months earlier. I was mortified. What should I say to friends if I am uncertain about their parents' mortality? -- Aging Parents, Pensacola, Florida

DEAR AGING PARENTS: Start by getting organized to the best of your ability. Make a written list of your friends and acquaintances, and write down their parents’ names and whether they are living -- to your knowledge. To verify, you may be able to check online, or ask friends who are close to them. When someone passes, make a note of it on your list. This may seem morbid, but it’s practical. It helps you to keep track of how to honor your friends and their parents. If you record the dates of the parents’ passing, you may even choose to be extra sensitive with friends on those anniversaries.

When you are unsure, be vague, and keep your questions about your friend. You can ask how the person is doing. That open-ended question often leads to a rich harvest of information. If you listen, you will likely learn the status of parents -- and many other personal facts.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have recently been promoted at my company, and I now directly manage the interns. One of the interns is consistently 10 to 15 minutes late to work. She always stays later than the other interns, but I think she should be prompt instead of making it up later. The company as a whole is relaxed about working hours, but this isn't the example I want set. -- Tick Tock, Seattle

DEAR TICK TOCK: Request a meeting with this intern to learn more about her. Ask her to tell you where she goes to school and what her plans are for the future. Ask her where she lives and if she knows the city well. Tell her you have noticed that she comes to work late every day. She may tell you about a difficult commute. She may say she comes late and works late. Or she may point out that time seems to be flexible at the office.

This is where you can come in with your experience and recommendations. Based on what you know about growing a professional career, point out to her that people who come to work early and who stay late are often the ones who get noticed and promoted in a work environment. Arriving at work late, even in a relaxed office, may be sending a message that is unintentional. Suggest that she treat this internship as if she were making a million dollars a year. What time would she show up to work then? What might she do differently? Suggest that she approach this job and every opportunity as if it were the most important work before her. In this way, she will learn more, earn more and excel.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started a new job and really want to make the best impression possible. The office is very close, and I still feel like the new guy after a few months. I have noticed that many of the employees go out after work for drinks or are interwoven in each other’s lives in one way or another. I’m not trying to be besties with anybody, but I do want to fit in. Should I try to organize an event after work so I'll be invited to one? All of my other post-work invitations must have been lost in the mail. -- Include Me, Raleigh, North Carolina

DEAR INCLUDE ME: Before organizing an event, consider your co-workers, and think about individuals with whom you may share some common interests. It might be better to invite one or two co-workers to go out after work for drinks before trying to host a big event. As you slowly build bonds with the people on the job, they may naturally choose to invite you to different events they are having. Or you may have to slowly develop your own core group of work friends. It’s best not to force the situation. Instead, grow relationships one by one.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)