DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband wants to go skydiving. I told him he could go by himself, because I have no interest in going. He wants me to do it with him and won’t stop bugging me about it. He won’t do it alone. Should I do it? I am so nervous, and I have a little fear of heights. -- Skydiving, Seattle
DEAR SKYDIVING: There is a way for you to be comfortable and for your husband to be fulfilled. You can go to the site to observe him skydiving without going up in the air. Inexperienced skydivers do not go unaccompanied. Your husband will be attached to another human being -- a skydiving expert, in fact. He can fully experience his bucket-list dream to fly in the sky with you present. The best news is that you can stand on the ground and record him in action to share with him later.
If he balks at this idea, let him know that this is the compromise that you can offer, that it will take a lot even for you to be present and watching him in flight. Ask him to have compassion for you and give you the space to support him and maintain your presence of self. If you don’t want to do it, don’t do it.