DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a pastor of a small church, and we are currently renting space at our local theater complex. Our plan is to purchase a building of our own in the future. In the meantime, my parishioners would like to incorporate a community outreach program while we are looking for a new home. I am having a hard time trying to find a happy medium between raising money for our new location and creating a presence in the community. What is the best way I can use the church funds to address these pressing issues simultaneously? -- Good Shepherd, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR GOOD SHEPHERD: Actually, your two goals -- fundraising for your new home and engaging the community in an uplifting outreach program -- should go together quite naturally. Building positive awareness in your community should help you connect with the movers and shakers as well as the mainstays in your neighborhood. If these people grow to like and respect you and your congregation, they will want you to stay. They may end up being key in your capital campaign.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I lost my father when I was 17 years old because of a drunk driver. Now, as a mother of two children, I want my children to appreciate their father in a way I feel like I didn't have the chance to. I have been thinking about ideas of how to make my children more appreciative, but it seems like they aren't even interested. -- Practice Gratitude, Dallas

DEAR PRACTICE GRATITUDE: Children learn by example. While you are inspired by the loss of your father, you need to find a source of inspiration for them with their own father. Think about what they do together that they enjoy. How does your husband bring joy to the children's lives? What do they enjoy together that they would like to continue? By tapping into what connects them naturally, you create space for their bond to flourish.

Do not just leave this to the children. Talk to your husband about your idea. Let him know its origin -- you missing this opportunity with your own father. Invite your husband to work with you to create special moments with the children. By engaging him, he becomes an active participant in building even better memories than may already be underway.

Don't go overboard in your zeal, though. Allow the family to enjoy each other in little and big ways. When you are around, take pictures of your children's engagements with their father. Gather those photos into photo albums. Get them printed on mugs or other memorabilia. Share images of your whole family -- including you -- with other family members as well.

By living your lives fully and being conscious about spending time together, including with your husband, you create space for beautiful relationships to bloom.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have decided to attend graduate school in fall 2017 because I do not feel like I am ready to attend this September. I have an extra 11 months to find the necessary monies to fund my graduate degree. Finding the money will be no problem; however, I am scared of taking the GRE and GMAT exams because I do not think I am good test-taker. What are some steps I can take to ease the anxiety of taking these exams? -- On the Clock, Jacksonville, Florida

DEAR ON THE CLOCK: If you are serious about getting into business school, you must do everything you can to prepare for these tests. This is the time for test prep. There are many books available that you can read, along with practice tests that you can take. But you may want to consider enrolling in a class with a live instructor who can guide you in test prep. You can immerse yourself in the readings and practice tests provided by the instructor and receive important feedback about areas where you may need improvement. Look for a class you can attend in person, or look online for a virtual class. Do your best to find one that offers interaction with the teacher.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 45-year-old screenwriter, and I have submitted my ideas to a numerous television production companies over the past 10 years. I remain hopeful because I am getting positive responses from various media companies for my style of writing. My family has their concerns because they would like me to work a regular job and stop chasing my dream of becoming a television writer.

I am slowly thinking I may have to put my dream of becoming a writer on the shelf, and this has me wondering, is there a time limit on working toward your dream? -- Patiently Waiting, New York City

DEAR PATIENTLY WAITING: On one hand, it's great that you have not given up on your dream. On the other, you really do need to figure out how to support your family consistently and responsibly. Many screenwriters have full-time jobs until they have their big break. It's similar to actors who wait tables until their day comes.

You cannot and should not shirk your responsibilities simply because a dream burns inside you. Chances are, you would do better with your family supporting your dream if you stepped up and showed initiative in putting your family first.

Bottom line: You have to determine if your time is up on this dream. Time is certainly up on you ignoring your family's financial security. Admit that to your family. And take concerted steps to find viable work that will provide some fulfillment for you as it immediately helps to fortify you and your loved ones.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: After 12 years of marriage and one child, I have diagnosed my husband with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). He completely fits the bill. "David" is an expert liar and manipulator, and he is extremely confident. His confidence and drive originally drew me to him, but over the past few years, he has accused me of having a victim mentality and damaging our relationship because I "refuse" to forgive him.

I didn't know this disorder existed, but now everything makes sense. His deflection, lack of empathy and hardheaded ways all point to NPD.

What can I do? He has been the love of my life, but also the constant wrongdoer in our relationship. His excuse when my friend caught him on a date with another woman? "I told you I was going out with friends." His NPD is pulling our relationship apart, and I don't even know if he cares. -- Love in a Hopeless Place, Cincinnati

DEAR LOVE IN A HOPELESS PLACE: Be wary of making diagnoses when you are not a physician. Since you have suspicions, do your best to get your husband to therapy. If you believe that your husband wants to stay married to you AND if you want to stay married to him, ask him to go to therapy with you so that you can figure out how to work through your problems and get to solid ground. This requires you to spell out to him that you do not trust him based on specific behaviors. Without professional help, it may be impossible for you to get to a manageable place. If he will not go, you should probably go anyway so that you can sort out your feelings and determine your next steps.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I work in a pretty small office. We are in the advertising world, and we work in groups to put together the best campaigns possible. Throughout the year, I've noticed "Bobby" becoming more and more friendly toward me. I thought it was great that we had a friendship, but I made it clear I have a serious boyfriend whom I plan on moving in with.

Two weeks ago, Bobby told me he loves me. I was stunned. I made it clear that I do not reciprocate these feelings, nor would I ever leave my boyfriend for him. Work has been awkward, to say the least. Is there any way to bring work back to the fun and friendly environment it used to be? -- One-Sided Work Relationship, Boston

DEAR ONE-SIDED WORK RELATIONSHIP: Be gentle with Bobby, even though you were clear with him from the start. Remind him that you were open and honest with him from the beginning. Tell him that you appreciate that he cares about you, but your caring for him is and has always been limited to a working relationship. Ask him to work with you to mend the friendship today so that you can continue to work together harmoniously.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)