DEAR HARRIETTE: I love attending dance performances. I have invited my sister to see one with me, and she said that she'd like to see me but that the dance would be boring. I suggested doing something else, but she has decided she'll "sit through" the dance performance if it means seeing me. Come on! She is not some martyr, and I want to disinvite her from this performance and plan something else. I brought up rescheduling to her, and she said she already committed so she is ready to "endure." I really don't think she's being funny and don't want her to think she's doing me any favors by entertaining what I want to see. How do I nix this performance once and for all? -- Not Going With a Buzzkill, Shreveport, LA
DEAR NOT GOING WITH A BUZZKILL: You are talking about your own sister! Pick up the phone and call her. Tell her that you don't want her to feel obligated to go to the performance with you. If she's not really into it, tell her that the two of you can do something else that you both like at another time. You will give your extra ticket to someone who will actually appreciate it.
When you talk to your sister, be kind and honest. Acknowledge that you didn't realize dance wasn't her interest. Promise to find a better fit next time. Give the ticket to someone else.