DEAR HARRIETTE: I accidentally spilled water all over my work laptop two days ago. I am so upset with myself. I let the laptop air out upside down, but there are still glitches with the processing system (screens will close or zoom in on their own). The computer functions poorly, but still turns on and connects to the Internet. I do not have the money to replace it now, and I doubt repairs will be much cheaper. I do not want to have to crawl to my parents asking them for money, but I know I will not be able to work to my full potential until I have a functioning laptop. If my boss walked over and saw the state of this computer, I would be so embarrassed. It will not even let me select certain text or click where I want to type! Should I stick it out with this computer for financial reasons? I do not want to have to deal with a loan or debt of any sort, especially for a laptop. -- Tech Trouble, Cincinnati

DEAR TECH TROUBLE: Move past your embarrassment and confide in your boss immediately. It is likely that your company has insurance that covers all of the equipment -- including laptops. While it is not ideal to have to repair or replace equipment, your company should be prepared to handle such hiccups. Apologize to your boss. Explain what happened and ask if the company can have it repaired or replaced. Assure your boss that you are not normally careless. Express your desire to do your best, and ask for support in getting your computer fixed.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a fumble at work yesterday. While giving a presentation with one of my colleagues, she cut me off and talked over me. I did not want to cause a scene, especially with those higher up in the company, so I spoke less and less during the presentation. Afterward, my colleague had the gall to mention that she carried the presentation. She steamrolled over me, and even presented the parts I was supposed to speak. I told her she overtook the presentation, and she told me I was not enough of a leader to stand up for myself. I am not sure what the higher-ups in the company thought about the presentation, but I do not want it to reflect badly upon me. Is there someone I can talk to so I can tell them why I was not talking during the presentation? Am I just going to have to let this one go? I do not want to cause problems, but I also do not want anyone thinking I am mousy or quiet. -- Steamrolled, Milwaukee

DEAR STEAMROLLED: There is no going backward and fixing this situation. Unfortunately, in the work environment -- as well as elsewhere -- some people are so competitive that they will throw you under the bus if you aren't able to stand up for yourself. Learn from this situation. Next time, be prepared and confident enough to take the lead on your part of a presentation. Speak up. You might even say, "Oh, thank you, (co-worker), but I've got that section of the presentation." And then proceed without skipping a beat!

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My hometown friends and I have recently parted ways to go off to our respective colleges. A few of us made a semi-serious promise to each other that we would tell the others if they gained the dreaded "freshman 15" by Thanksgiving. I am committed to health and fitness, but not all in the group are this way. I noticed through photos and video chats that one of my friends is gaining weight. She will even send me text messages proclaiming, "You better be ready to tell me I got fat!" I would never tell someone they got "fat," but I would be lying if I told her all of the cookies and candy hadn't caught up to her. I am hoping to avoid this conversation when I go home, since I never expected this promise to be taken seriously. As long as my friend is happy, I will support her, but I don't know what to do or say if she brings up her weight gain. Should I redirect the topic or tell her the truth when I see her? -- Freshman Fifteen, Denver

DEAR FRESHMEN FIFTEEN: Given that your friend has brought up your pledge since being at college and since gaining weight, take her at her word that she wants to hear the truth -- gently revealed. When she comes home and if she brings it up, tell her -- in private -- that you have noticed that she seems to have put on a few pounds. Ask her if she is happy. If so, leave it at that. If she says she is concerned about her weight, suggest that she go to the gym at school. You could even agree to be buddies long-distance and schedule workouts a few days a week and hold each other accountable. That is only if you would like to do such a thing.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel as though I am going through a problem many girls would love to have: My boyfriend is buying me too many gifts. I am always slightly uncomfortable with receiving gifts, but my boyfriend says he loves buying me things. Earrings, sweaters, chocolates and even mini-vacations to hotels in nearby cities are all gifts that have been given to me multiple times. I am not high maintenance. I think being treated to a nice dinner is the best gift possible. Whenever I propose the idea of no gifts, my boyfriend laughs and says that is never going to happen. Not only do I find these gifts unnecessary sometimes, it puts pressure on me to reciprocate! I wrestle the check away from him at dinners and do buy him presents occasionally, but I don't think spending so much money on each other makes sense. Also, I don't have as much disposable income as he does and would love to limit gifting, but the conversation never goes well. What is the best solution to this frivolous problem? -- Gift Guilt, Dallas

DEAR GIFT GUILT: Tell your boyfriend that you would like him to use his resources differently. Rather than lavishing you with gifts, why not start an investment account where you save toward a goal. Refuse the gifts, even though he keeps bringing them, and redirect him toward a savings or investment instrument or even a charity. If you stop accepting, he will eventually stop giving.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a believer that everything happens with a reason and purpose. A man I have known for 20 years has come back into my life. The connection is really strong between us, but we do not live in the same state. He has two children and a common-law wife, but I do not care because I am in love with him. Do you think I should explore these feelings, or should I let past feelings stay in the past? -- Wonderful Memories, Baton Rouge, Louisiana

DEAR WONDERFUL MEMORIES: Let the past stay in the past. You are a dreamer, which can be nice; however, in this case, your dreaming can set your life and this man's on a course toward disaster. He obviously has made his choice to build a family with his partner and their children. For you to explore romantic possibilities with him while he is in an obviously committed relationship would be disrespectful and potentially destructive. If you do not believe you can curb your feelings for him, step away and do not rekindle any kind of friendship with him. It is not worth it for anyone involved.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I need some help. I have a friend who is at least an hour late to every function I invite him to. It drives me crazy because my friend always has an amazing excuse for his tardiness. Last week, I invited him to a concert, and he arrived an hour into the performance. Since going to the concert, I have thought about creative ways for him to arrive on time. For example, I could tell my friend we will meet an hour and a half before our scheduled time. That way, if he is running an hour late, he will actually be on time. I hope this plan works because I do not want to find a new friend. -- Tardy to the Party, Memphis, Tennessee

DEAR TARDY TO THE PARTY: Before you come up with a range of creative strategies to trick this friend into being on time, find out why he is always late. Ask him directly. Ask him if he is late in other parts of his life. Does he go to work late? Visit other friends late? Probe to figure out what his story is. You want to determine if this is an overall pattern or if he is not valuing your friendship in ways that you would appreciate and expect.

Rather than attempting to trick him, be direct with him. Tell him that if he cannot show up on time to meet you, you will have to limit what you invite him to attend. Point out the concert when he was an hour late. Maybe a concert is not the right function for you to share. You can also give him a time limit. Perhaps you will wait 30 minutes for him, and after that you will leave. By establishing your boundaries, you can be less vulnerable to waiting for your phantom friend to show up.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)