DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a business partner who is driving me crazy. On one hand, she is strong in areas where I am not so strong. But the part that is killing me is that every time we have a conversation, I have to listen to her screaming on the phone. Everything seems like an argument with her, and I do not like to argue -- at all. I have told her that I need her to tone it down a few notches. I have even asked her to stop fussing all the time and try to frame the conversation in a positive way. I feel like I am talking to the wall. What else can I do? I value our working relationship, but I cannot stand this aspect of it. -- Bad Work Marriage, Seattle

DEAR BAD WORK MARRIAGE: Schedule a face-to-face meeting with your business partner, and tell her that you need to talk about the way you two interact. Remind her of what you appreciate about your business relationship, and point out that there are some problems. Be specific when you tell her the things that she does or says, and how her behavior makes you feel. If, for instance, you get anxious when she raises her voice, point that out. If you simply hate arguing and prefer to interact in a calm voice, ask her to make the effort to talk to you when she can be calm and to avoid confronting you when she is heated. Find out what gets under her skin about you as well. Having a healthy conversation about communication styles and preferences may help the two of you to find a happy meeting ground from which you can both prosper.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a senior friend who is single and extremely private. She mentioned to me that she is going to have hip replacement surgery soon. Immediately, I offered to help in whatever way I could. She retreated almost as quickly, saying she would be fine and didn't need any help. I'm torn. I know other people who have had this surgery, and in the beginning, you really do need help. I don't think it's possible to get around without some outside support. I don't care if my friend chooses me to help her, but I know she will need somebody. How can our friend group support her if she refuses our help? -- Lending a Hand, Salt Lake City

DEAR LENDING A HAND: You cannot force yourself or your friends on this woman. At the same time, you can attempt to get key information from her. That would include where she is having the surgery and on what date, her expected date to return home and if she has lined up any support. You can ask these questions.

Then, you and your friends can decide that you will call her at least once a day and stop by with prepared food on the off chance that she will accept it. If you keep showing up, she will likely let you know if she is in serious need.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: A couple of years back, a guy named Josh and I had a fling. We have since become platonic friends, and we even vacation in the same large group. His girlfriend is very bubbly, and it is nice to see them happy together. Recently, 20 of us were all away together, and Josh's mother made an appearance. I found myself having an excellent conversation with her and enjoyed meeting her. Josh's girlfriend, however, may have made a gaffe by ignoring the mother. Later, one of the people on the trip overheard Josh's mother talking to him. She said Josh's girlfriend is rude and that she likes me more. The mother does not know about our past dalliance. I have a boyfriend, only see Josh as a friend and do not want to make an enemy out of his girlfriend. The group gossip told me, so I know I am not the only one who knows about the mother-son conversation. Do I ignore the situation? -- Keeping It in the Past, Dallas

DEAR KEEPING IT IN THE PAST: If you and Josh speak regularly, you could contact him to give him the heads-up. Tell him how nice you think his girlfriend is and recommend that he encourage her to get to know his mom. Because you spoke at length with her and the girlfriend did not, the mom naturally is reminded of you and interested in you. You can immediately deflect that back to his current relationship. Remind Josh that you have a boyfriend and you are just looking out for him and his girlfriend.

Now, if you and Josh rarely talk, just let this die down on its own. Ultimately, the two of them need to find their way with his mother. Offer your advice only if you think it will be heard.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 12-year-old son came home from camp raving about a girl he had met. The two of them have been texting up a storm. The rule is that he has to let me look at his phone whenever I want in order for him to have a cellphone. So far, their interaction seems age-appropriate. They have talked about sports, TV shows and cellphone games. I'm not sure what else to monitor. We constantly talk about appropriate conversation between boys and girls. How do I support him during these early days of "dating" without smothering him? -- Entering the Teen Years, Madison, Wisconsin

DEAR ENTERING THE TEEN YEARS: You seem to be doing a good job of monitoring your son's phone. Be sure to have regular conversations with him about camp, not just about the young lady, as that could feel awkward. Talk about his whole day. Get him animated as he describes his activities. Let him bring up the girl on occasion. You can ask as well. If she lives close, find out if he would like to invite her over to visit so that you can meet her. Supervised engagements are a great way for you to get to know someone your son likes.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a girlfriend who is overweight; she is always trying out fad diets. She has yo-yoed for years with her weight, and it just seems crazy to me. I have to bite my tongue as she goes from one diet to the next, but I grow weary of even hearing her talk about these various exploits. Whenever I invite her to exercise with me or take a cooking class or anything, she shrugs it off and starts raving about whatever fad she is on. How can I remain respectful of her but draw the line about what I'm willing to talk about? I am exhausted by the fads. -- Fad-Free, Denver

DEAR FAD-FREE: People get their minds wrapped around ideas of what will be good for them, and often they cannot see beyond those concepts. You cannot control or influence your friend's behavior. You have witnessed that already. What you can do is to be mindful of your own well-being. If you feel that it is too frustrating for you to listen to tales of your friend's diet exploits, tell her as much. If she reacts as if she is offended, you have every right to say to her -- as kindly as you can muster -- that you love her and want the best for her but do not agree with the choices she makes about her health. Tell her that it's best for you not to engage in conversation about those choices as you do not want to be rude to her, but you just do not co-sign those choices.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have an employee who now works part-time for my company. He comes in once a week for eight hours and completes a significant amount of work. Then he goes to his other job. This has worked fairly well for the past few months. Recently, though, he has slacked off. He comes in late, and most recently didn't come at all or call. When I texted him, he said he had things to do at home, but he hadn't bothered to tell me. In general, this man does a good job. How can I get him to remain as responsible as he used to be now that he works part-time? -- Stepping Up Part-Time, Washington, D.C.

DEAR STEPPING UP PART-TIME: Switching to part-time can prove problematic for some people as the structure of the workweek changes dramatically. This can be especially true for someone who enjoys flexibility due to earned seniority. It is time for you to remind this employee of his responsibilities. Top of the list is communication.

Schedule a meeting with him where you remind him of how much you value his work with your company. Tell him how significant it is when he doesn't show up. Remind him of your house rules, whatever they may be, but which must include that employees say something if they cannot come to work. Ask him if there is anything going on in his life that has caused him to be delinquent at work. Since you have appreciated him in the past, get to the bottom of what's happening now. A pep talk may be enough to get him back on track. If not, start looking for his replacement.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)