DEAR HARRIETTE: I used to be best friends with a girl in middle school, and our moms became close friends as a result. Years later, we have grown apart, but they are still close friends. I am happy my mother has a confidante and partner in crime, but both mothers do not seem to understand that their daughters do not share the same bond. They think setting us up on "play dates" of sorts will work to rekindle our friendship. We grew apart because of a difference in values and interests, and I am happy with the current amount of friends I have. I am always cordial to the daughter when I see her, but I find this maternal meddling frustrating. Is there any way to politely tell my mother to get over the end of my middle school friendship? -- No Old Friends, Memphis, Tennessee
DEAR NO OLD FRIENDS: The direct approach is the best approach. Talk to your mother and tell her that you are happy that she and the other mom have become so close. Then point out that the same is not true for you and her daughter, and it is OK. The two of you do not share the same values, interests or friends, so neither of you is trying to cultivate a bond. Ask your mother to let you live your life as she enjoys hers.