DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my best friends has been down in the dumps for a long time now. Ever since the new year, it seems to have gotten worse. It's not that she is without good reason. She lost her job a few years ago and was getting unemployment insurance until the time ran out. Now she is piecing together jobs here or there, but hardly making enough money to keep her place and eat. I am at a loss for how to help her. I do not have any real money to give her, and I don't have room for her to live with my family and me. But she is my friend. I want to do something to lift her spirits. Any ideas? -- Worried Friend, Racine, Wisconsin

DEAR WORRIED FRIEND: Your friend may be able to find support through a local community organization or house of worship. Often these places host food banks where they give away groceries on a daily or weekly basis. These same organizations commonly offer spiritual counseling, which can be helpful for someone who is depressed. The local unemployment office should offer workshops on staying employment-viable. Your friend can check into the availability of classes, workshops and counseling there.

Research the outlets listed above and present them to your friend as options for support. Stay positive and let her know you believe in her. When people have been out of work for prolonged periods of time, they often lose faith in themselves. Be a cheerleader!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a recent college graduate, and now I work as an investment banker for one of the top global investment banks. I studied finance during college and figured this would be a commendable career path. However, almost eight months in, I have come to the conclusion that this is truly not for me. I had some forewarning about my career path and its work hours, but mine are insane. I'm just not happy, and I'd never want to compromise my happiness for monetary gain. I make decent money for my age, but I don't even have enough time to spend the money I make. All of my spare time is used either to sleep or to finish work tasks at home that didn't get completed. I don't know what specific career would make me happy at the age of 23, but I know what I'm doing right now is not it. Do you have any suggestions? -- Gotta Go, New York City

DEAR GOTTA GO: I strongly recommend that you stay for a bit longer. While this may not be your career track long-term, what you should do for your professional reputation is to work there for at least a year, preferably longer, to show that you are not a quitter. You want to build a reputation of being a professional who takes your job seriously.

Instead of giving up just yet, learn everything you can about your industry and master your job. You never know when you will need those skills in the future. While you are working so hard, save as much money as you can. This will be your cushion when you leave your job and work to figure out what's next.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been asked to conduct a workshop to help introduce a senior citizen group to the Internet, and I am having a difficult time putting the program together because 60 percent of the group has never sat in front of a computer before. I am aware that I will receive some pushback from the group because they will have to confront their fears regarding technology. How can I make logging on the Internet a fun experience for this particular group of people? -- Bridging the Gap, West Orange, New Jersey

DEAR BRIDGING THE GAP: Start by letting this group of people know something that they already know -- namely, that everything is hard when you don't know how to do it and easy once you figure it out. Promise them that once they learn a few simple steps, they will be able to walk into a whole new world that is exciting, fun and as close as the push of a button.

Compare the computer to a television set. It looks like nothing when it's turned off but comes to life in myriad ways once you turn it on and engage the remote. Continue to look for familiar examples that these seniors will understand as you walk them through how to use a computer. Gently work with them one-on-one to show them how to get online. Be patient. When they get it, they will be excited. It takes time and follow-up on your part so that if they forget how to do a step, you are there to remind them.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a senior in high school in Missouri, and many of my classmates have decided which colleges they are planning to attend in the fall. I am frustrated because my family constantly asks me what my plans are when I graduate from high school. At the present time, I am not sure what I want to do regarding college; however, I do have a dream of opening a petite coffee shop in Philadelphia when I am older. I tell my friends about my dreams of being an entrepreneur, and they look at me as if I am crazy. They badger me with myriad questions about making a living with a coffee shop. This is my dream, and I need help figuring out my first step to make it come true. -- I Can Dream, St. Louis

DEAR I CAN DREAM: You are clear about your dream, but not about the steps to making it come true. Since you want to run a business, why not go to a college that teaches just that? Enroll in a college that has a strong business program.

While in school, get a job in the restaurant business. Find a coffee shop that you like and get a job there -- any job. Be a keen observer and learn each role. Figure out what it takes to run a coffee shop and make it profitable.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Every year, a co-worker helps his daughter sell Girl Scout cookies, and it's hard to say no because the dad forces everyone to make a purchase. The cookies are amazing, but I would prefer to purchase them from a place of happiness as opposed to being forced to make a purchase. How can I make the experience more enjoyable the next time around because I believe in helping the organization? -- Cookie Peddler, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR COOKIE PEDDLER: One way to feel more at ease about this experience is to think about the big picture. Your co-worker is doing a great thing by helping his daughter in her sales effort. Not every parent joins in for these endeavors. Forgive him for not being a skilled salesperson. If you can look at him with compassion, it may help you to feel less irritated, especially since you actually do like the product.

To any parent out there who is attempting to help a child sell any goods to friends and co-workers as a fundraiser for an organization, charity or school, remember to be gracious. Do not be pushy. Instead, speak about the cause. Ask repeat contributors to give again, but do not push them. If you keep track of what your "customers" buy, you may also want to be specific when you ask again. "Did you like those shortbread cookies you bought last year? Would you be interested in buying more?" Then step back and allow the person to think about it. Graciousness often makes more sales.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My fraternity brother, who is also my line brother, has recently gotten engaged to his girlfriend of more than six years. I am very happy for both of them, as they are wonderful for each other and have an amazing spiritual foundation. I haven't met the wife because we attended different universities, but I am excited for the wedding, which has been set for the summer. I am not only excited that my close friend is getting married, but I am elated because this is my first wedding as an adult. It would be negligent if I didn't mention that I am a recent college graduate and I currently reside in one of the most expensive states in the U.S. The wedding is out of state, which will require me to cover flight and hotel accommodations. With this in mind, what are some good gift ideas for the future husband and wife? -- My First Wedding, New York City

DEAR MY FIRST WEDDING: Congratulations to your friend who is getting married. As you make your way to your friend's wedding, create a budget that lets you know what resources you need in order to cover expenses. With a clear understanding of what you need and what you have, go to the couple's gift registry and look for something that fits within your modest budget. Usually, couples will select a broad range of items they need to start their life together, typically across a range of prices. Do not feel ashamed that you can afford only a small gift. The gift of your presence counts for a lot, too!

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)