DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my employees has formally complained about me at least twice in recent weeks. My human resources director informed me. It's odd, because she has never said anything to me about her issues with me. I am a big believer in being direct in my communication with my team. Should I say something to her about this, even though she didn't tell me? -- To the Point, Chicago

DEAR TO THE POINT: Go back to your human resources director and learn more about your employee's concerns. Find out what her complaints are so that you can assess what the issues are and how you might address them. Ask your H.R. director for any insights that may help you to navigate this challenge effectively. Also, find out if it is OK for you to go back to your employee to discuss this issue. Sometimes, people bring their concerns to H.R. and ask for them to remain confidential. Be in alignment with your H.R. director before you go to this employee.

With consensus, go back to the employee in question, and ask her to share her concerns with you directly. Your goal here is to build a better rapport with her so that you two can work out your differences without the need for mediation. Let her know that you understand she is dissatisfied with particular aspects of your leadership style. Talk it out if you can, and come up with a plan that allows the two of you to feel at ease moving forward.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I participated in a webinar the other day about financial fitness and realized that if I don't do something dramatic, I am going to be in trouble when it comes time for me to retire. I have extremely limited resources, so I don't think I can afford a fancy financial planner like was mentioned during this course. What can I do now when my pennies are limited but my eyes are open to the reality of my pathetic financial future? -- Stop Being Broke, Syracuse, New York

DEAR STOP BEING BROKE: I recently spoke with a financial adviser from Prudential, ShirleyAnn Robertson, who broke it down simply. She explained that everyone can use a financial adviser; you don't have to wait to be wealthy to get one. In fact, you have a much better chance of building wealth if you have a professional who knows about money management helping to guide your financial steps.

The mistake that many people make is what you described: They are often too embarrassed to ask for help. You made a good first effort by participating in the financial webinar. Next, go to your bank or another financial institution and get a consultation with someone about your specific financial profile. Find someone who will work with you wherever you are financially. Do not be afraid to ask.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in a quiet suburban neighborhood where everybody pretty much knows each other. Most of us work outside the home, including myself, but the other day I did not go in. At a certain point, I heard a car pull up to the house next to mine, so I looked out the window. I saw the teenage daughter of my neighbor enter the house with a teenage boy. They stayed there for several hours before leaving. I know this is none of my business, but I feel very uncomfortable about this situation. I did not go over there because that felt like overstepping my bounds. I think I should tell her parents what I saw. Am I right, or should I keep my observations to myself? -- Not a Busybody, Salt Lake City

DEAR NOT A BUSYBODY: By all means, reach out to this teen's mom right away. Call her and tell her you do not mean to meddle, but you have something to tell her. Just say what you saw with no embellishments. Do not theorize on what may have happened in the house. Tell her approximately what time the car pulled up and how long the two were inside.

Listen for her reaction. She will likely be embarrassed, but hopefully she will be grateful that you are looking out for her child's welfare. The way she handles the information will be a cue for you as to how you will handle sharing information with her in the future.

DEAR HARRIETTE: The other day I was driving down the street, and I saw a celebrity in a car nearby. No kidding. I saw Venus Williams in a minivan that said U.S. Open on it. I was so excited, and because we were all in a traffic jam, I took the opportunity to roll down my window and call out to say "hello" to her. Now, she doesn't know me from anybody, but I figured it was OK to greet her. She smiled and waved and said "hi" back. I was so excited. I'm not a groupie kind of person, but this just happened, and I feel good that somebody who is a real celebrity was nice enough to greet me back. When I told my girlfriends, one of them said that I didn't have class because I interrupted Venus' privacy. She made me feel really bad even though Venus herself was lovely. Was I wrong to say hello to her? -- Thoughtful, New York City

DEAR THOUGHTFUL: Saying hello to a celebrity who is in earshot of you with her window down is fine. Had you yelled and been loud about it, that would be a different matter. As you experienced, Venus graciously spoke back to you. When it wouldn't be appropriate is if the celebrity were in a semi-private place and preoccupied, like seated at dinner or at a play. Driving by in a car is OK.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a co-worker who speaks so loudly on the phone that it is hard to concentrate on my work. I think she needs a hearing aid or something. We work in cubicles, so it's an open-air situation. I cannot keep my concentration, though. It's as if she is screaming. Several people have asked her to tone it down, but she shrugs us off. I'm not kidding when I say I think she has a hearing problem. Even though she's not old, that has to be the problem. My brother-in-law has hearing aids, and he's in his 40s. He said his hearing loss came from listening to too much loud music. Anyway, what can I do or say to get her to understand she's too loud? -- Driving Me Crazy, Shreveport, Louisiana

DEAR DRIVING ME CRAZY: If you are friendly with your co-worker, you could tell her about your brother-in-law. Having an example to illustrate something that you think is going on with a person can be illuminating.

Shy of that, go to your supervisor and explain what is going on. Ask if it's possible for you to move farther away from this person or if she might be able to be moved into a room with a door. Ask your supervisor to speak to her about the volume of her conversation. If nothing changes, get permission to wear noise-canceling headphones in the office. By listening to music at a low volume, you may be able to tune out your co-worker's loud voice.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend at work who often asks me to borrow a few dollars. He always returns it, so I haven't thought much of it. But the other day when he asked to borrow something like $20, I didn't have any cash on me, so I told him I couldn't help him out. He got really mad. He asked me to go to the ATM to get the money because he really needed it. I was busy and said I could not do that. It got me to thinking: I wonder what he needs these small sums for all the time. I have decided I don't want to be part of it, but I'm not sure how to handle it so that he stays calm. Help! -- Off the Dole, Detroit

DEAR OFF THE DOLE: Pull your friend to the side and tell him you need to talk. Ask him why he regularly asks you for money. Ask him if everything is OK with him and his life. Express your genuine concern, then draw the line. Tell him that you will no longer be able to spot him money. Explain that it makes you uncomfortable and you would rather not have that type of relationship with him. State any regret that this change in your dynamic may cause, but make it crystal-clear to him that you will no longer be a source of money.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)