DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend told me that her husband was up for a huge job and not to say anything yet. Last time we talked about it, it sounded like a shoo-in. My husband and I are getting together with them soon, and in our texts to each other, I asked when he was going to be making his move. She ignored that question. Now it feels awkward. What if he didn't get the job after all? Do I say anything when we hang out together, or should I just let her say whatever she wants to tell us? Since she told us, I think she should close the loop. No? -- Want to Know, Chicago
DEAR WANT TO KNOW: This is why it's so much better for people to keep news to themselves until it is real. Of course people want to tell their friends what is going on in their lives, but then you are responsible for managing that information. Yes, your friend should tell you, either individually or when your two families are together, the status of her husband's job. She doesn't owe you an explanation, but out of respect for the initiation of the information, she should help to close the gap one way or another.
Still, you should not ask anymore. Instead, simply enjoy your time together. Ignore the elephant in the room. If you have already told your husband, implore him not to say anything. Let your friends reveal whatever they choose, which could be nothing at all. If that's the case, you will have to let it go.