DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a fine artist, with a studio attached to my home. Friends and visitors often ask to see the studio, and I am happy to oblige. Sometimes, a visitor will ask how much a particular piece costs.

This puts me on the spot. I usually say, “Well, I would normally charge $300 for that painting, but with my ‘friends and family’ discount, I would charge $150.”

On a few occasions, I’ve had a visitor who looks aghast and murmurs something to the effect of, “I didn’t think it would be so expensive.”

Miss Manners, I do not know how to respond! I have already halved the price (which is never outlandish to begin with), and am now made to feel I’m being greedy or unreasonable. My reaction has been a strained smile and some breezy comment about how the piece was particularly time-consuming, etc., but by then the atmosphere has changed, and is difficult to undo.

Am I being rude? Should I have declined to discuss prices in this context? I suspect my guest has been rude by implying my work is not worth the (discounted!) price. How can I handle this situation more politely in the future?

GENTLE READER: Although the studio is adjacent to your home, you keep it separate for a reason (less paint in the yogurt). Miss Manners wonders if your guests need more space between their slightly impertinent question and the implied sales pitch of your answer: They may have asked the price out of mere curiosity.

Either tell them you have not yet set a price, or, if you think they are serious about a purchase, tell them that you would sell it to a commercial dealer for $300 -- with an emphasis on the word "commercial" that invites them to ask a further question.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I beg for guidance on the proper etiquette with one’s cutlery at hotel buffet breakfasts. While there are abundant clean plates, the protocol seems to be that one has but a single set of cutlery.

Perhaps this is to shame one into avoiding gluttonous behavior.

However, when moving from bacon and eggs to toast or muffins, how should one get a clean knife? The knife and fork disappear in the hands of the waitstaff. Asking for new ones is rarely met with a gracious response from the (admittedly busy) servers.

GENTLE READER: Is this a trick question, Miss Manners wonders?

One gets a new knife and fork by requesting them, an answer that does not depend on whether those previously supplied were made dirty by yourself or an unnamed third party.

As to whether the staff is spending breakfast judging you, she cannot say for certain, but suspects they have better things to occupy their thoughts -- such as when this meal service is finally going to be over.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have seen a close relative in the news for something nefarious. I know they must be upset by the reports, and I sincerely feel bad for them, as I know this action was out of character.

Should I acknowledge the incident and comfort them, or just ignore the whole thing? I want to let them know things will be OK, but don’t want to embarrass them.

GENTLE READER: Miss Manners notes that the action was not, however, so out of character that you appear to have any doubt about the facts.

The approach to take is to ask how they are doing. You will not need -- or want -- to mention the incident directly, or even add any special inflection when you ask how they are. Most people are well-informed about their own lives, so they will make the connection and you can then follow that lead.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was dealing with someone who was complaining about a political situation, which he said made him feel very sad and scared. I replied, sincerely, that I was sorry he felt so bad about it and I hoped he felt better soon. Then he complained about “people who say they’re sorry but are really insincere about it.”

Is there any way to express my sympathies about how bad he felt without agreeing with his view of the situation?

GENTLE READER: There is, and you already did it. The best way to avoid a fight with someone who appears to be seeking one is not to worry yourself about subtext.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband died unexpectedly three months ago. It was a shock and I am not OK.

But sometimes I have to go grocery shopping. As I start to move around in the world again, people stop me frequently and ask how I’m doing.

This is difficult to answer, and I understand they are trying to be kind. But then they often go on to share with me painful stories of the spouse, sibling, child or dear friend they lost, and how hard it was for them.

I think this is an effort to show solidarity or demonstrate that I’m not alone in my grief. But it ends up with me shouldering the burden of gathering heartbreaking, sometimes traumatic, stories as I go through my day. This near-constant reminder of how unhappy people are inside is not making things easier; it’s making me want to go back to hibernating.

When someone, maybe with good intent, starts oversharing, how do I politely get them to just ... not? I’m sure their pain is real and that they also need support, but I am not the person to give it right now.

GENTLE READER: “Thank you so much for asking. I’m still at that stage where everything reminds me of my loss, which is why I am not going out. I would love to see you again and talk more when I’m able to. Excuse me.” The difficult -- but critical -- next step is then to walk away.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A few months ago, I met a man on a singles website and we began dating. Things seemed to be progressing nicely between us until he blurted out that he was married.

He explained that he hoped we would continue to see each other anyway, because we got along so well. He said he'd never lied to me by telling me he was single, and since I'd never asked if he was married, he saw no need to tell me.

I was disgusted, and told him he had been deceptive by being on a singles site in the first place. I told him he was a bad person and walked out.

The problem is that he lives in my neighborhood, and I have since seen him shopping in the same stores I do, usually alone. So far, he has been too far away or too preoccupied to have noticed me.

If we run into each other in some aisle, however, do I say something? Pretend I don’t see him? What if he tries to speak to me?

GENTLE READER: You can cut him, of course, but Miss Manners suggests that you nod coolly and move on.

She hopes that you do not have fantasies of denouncing him in front of the other shoppers. It would only suggest to them that you are angry because he jilted you.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When and where should a lady wear white gloves?

GENTLE READER: Nowadays, probably when she is handling valuable antiques, serving on the staff of a very fancy restaurant, or dressing up as Minnie Mouse.

But Miss Manners remembers a time when it was considered ladylike to wear short white cotton gloves in summertime. It was simply a finishing touch before going out in public. This was before people started going out in public in their pajamas, workout clothes and unadorned underwear.

It was also before those innocent little gloves became symbolic of all the disadvantages of being a lady, and were spoken of as if they were handcuffs.

Perhaps you are referring to over-the-elbow kid gloves, worn with full formal dress. These are also rare nowadays, as “white tie” is seldom worn. You can see them being mishandled in period costume dramas, where eating and drinking while wearing gloves would have tipped off real people of the period that those characters were clueless interlopers.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I received a wedding invitation from a good friend that began, “Mrs. Sallie Doe and the Late Mr. John Doe request the presence of your company at the marriage of their daughter.”

I was torn between amusement and pity. Assuming I could not attend, how would one direct regrets to the Dear Departed?

Now I’m wondering if the Dear Departed will be on hand to give the bride away -- which might be a compelling reason to attend. A penny for your thoughts?

GENTLE READER: That you should try very hard to suppress the amusement and go with the pity.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)